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I still don't understand why it faux-pas to just put cash in a nice card... I just do it anyway. It's a more universal gift card without fees and expiration da

I still don't understand why it faux-pas to just put cash in a nice card... I just do it anyway. It's a more universal gift card without fees and expiration dates... Anyone who tries to put me down for doing so will simply not be receiving a gift from me next year... Screw stressful stores. plastic cards, and standing in line, my method is much more "green"... :P

a4isms 5y ago
“I think a gift card is a bad gift. You take money that is good everywhere...” (long pause, punctuated by applause and laughter) —Mitch Hedberg, 1968 - 2005
hamandcheese 5y ago
Is it? In my family it definitely isn’t.
- ncpa-cpl 5y ago
  My family accepts cash and equivalents for Christmas. The past four Christmas I've sent bank transfers on the 25th. Shopping malls, ATMs and banks get just too crowded those days.
- mixmastamyk 5y ago
  Probably some trade consortium trying to convince you that cash is looked down upon. I've yet to meet a younger person who didn't appreciate "cold hard cash" in a card, a la Lucy Van Pelt.
- TigeriusKirk 5y ago
  We make the same "hope it fits" joke every year and everyone still smiles, so I guess it works fine.
lhorie 5y ago
In chinese culture, it's a pretty normal thing to give red envelopes with cash inside[0] [0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_envelope https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_envelope
- mikepurvis 5y ago
  Those are a family thing, though. Other than at my wedding, I've only ever received a straight cash gift from family members (eg, grandparents).
  - AussieWog93 5y ago
    Every Chinese kid gets these during the New Year celebrations. It's not a family thing so much as it's cultural.
    - mikepurvis 5y ago
      But mostly within families, right? Admittedly I don't have any first hand exposure to these customs, but are red envelopes being given at work parties or between adult friends? The Wikipedia article cited in this thread is a bit vague on this: "Red envelopes are gifts presented at social and family gatherings such as weddings or holidays such as Chinese New Year. The red color of the envelope symbolizes good luck and is a symbol to ward off evil spirits. It is also gifted when a person is visiting as a gesture of kindness for visiting. The act of requesting red packets is normally called tao hongbao or yao lishi, and in the south of China, dou li shi. Red envelopes are usually given out to the younger generation who are normally still in school or unemployed." I loved Sacred Economics and I'm all about figuring out how to reintegrate potlatching and other gift economy ideas into the western world. We desperately need mechanisms other than inheritance for transferring wealth to the younger generations. So I'd love to hear that these practices are occurring outside extended families, but that's not been my impression.
      - AussieWog93 5y ago
        I've definitely seen hongbao exchanged between adult friends in a wedding setting, but I'm not sure if this extends to the general case.
      - lhorie 5y ago
        I mean, it's "mostly within families" in the sense that most gifting occurs within family anywhere, but it certainly isn't restricted to familial contexts; you could definitely give them to friends, co-workers, teachers or other acquaintances. Traditionally, there's some nuances to it, e.g. it's often a tradition associated with visiting someone, and it is meant to have symbolic intent, meaning that it doesn't fit settings like secret santas.
oneoff786 5y ago
It’s not really a faux pas but it’s not very thoughtful. Receiving a small amount of money is also irrelevant to most middle class and above people.
- mikepurvis 5y ago
  I don't see a gift card as much more thoughtful than cash, but there's at least the slight push of "use this to spoil yourself" when it's something indulgent like Starbucks, the liquor store, Steam, whatever. Versus cash where you may have given it with that intent, but it just as easily ends up folded into the general pot and becoming something boring like gas, groceries, whatever.
  - chongli 5y ago
    Yeah exactly. As the article points out, if you give someone a gift card to a book store knowing they’re an avid reader then that person will presumably use it to buy some books they really want to read. Then when they’re reading they’ll think of you and feel good. On the other hand, if you go out and just buy them some books they might smile and thank you sheepishly but then those books might sit unread on a shelf forever. People’s tastes can be very specific and so it may be very difficult to buy them a gift they’ll truly appreciate and enjoy unless you’re very close. It’s much easier to buy a gift card for a retailer (coffee, books, video games, makeup, fashion) in their area of interest than to try to buy something truly suited to their tastes. This is especially the case for casual acquaintances such as coworkers.
toomuchtodo 5y ago
I zelle’d (US instant payment system for participating financial institutions) someone their cash wedding gift, to heck with social convention.
- sabujp 5y ago
  this is the correct way, fast, no transaction fees, no one takes a cut
  - kelnos 5y ago
    And safe and easy. Cash in an envelope could be lost, and then it's gone. A check could be lost and would need to be canceled and re-written. And either way you have to take an extra step to get it in your bank account. (At least with a check, most banks have a phone deposit option. You'd have to physically take the cash to a bank branch or at best ATM.)
stronglikedan 5y ago
I'm with you. Cash for adults. Toys for kids. If it discourages anyone from giving me a gift in the future, that's all the better. I like give giving, not gift exchanging.
LouisSayers 5y ago
If you're poor then it's definitely appreciated. If you've got money then it's nice, but doesn't have the same effect.
mavhc 5y ago
https://jeremyperson.com/2009/12/25/dilbert-christmas-gifts https://jeremyperson.com/2009/12/25/dilbert-christmas-gifts I'm terrible at gifts, but I'd never give cash/gift cards (cash that expires and you can only spend in one shop) The point of a gift is to show that you understand your friend/family member and have spent your own time to try to make them happy
- geek_at 5y ago
  I agree to an extent but if you know somebody is saving up for something (eg. niece saving up for a gaming pc) then it's a great gift to bring them closer to their goal. For a co-worker you should probably think a bit harder
  - mavhc 5y ago
    If they ask for cash, fair enough
- kelnos 5y ago
  > cash that expires In some places, gift cards cannot legally expire. Other objections still apply, but fortunately not always that one, which I agree is gross.
cmckn 5y ago
I don’t think it is, at least not in my family. Cash is no more of a faux pas than a gift card, at least. I happen to think either is a pretty lame gift. Instead of a gift card to LUSH, for example, just buy me a bath bomb or whatever. Maybe I won’t like the scent you choose, maybe I’ll love it—that’s the nature of receiving a gift. Besides, gift cards are rarely enough to cover an actual purchase with taxes and etc added, so they often end up forcing the recipient to spend some of their own money (or they gather dust until they expire). I know some people are “hard to buy for” but this might be an indication that you shouldn’t be giving them a gift. If you don’t know them well enough to have a gift idea, or don’t feel comfortable asking for ideas, are you really obligated to get them something?
- winternett 5y ago
  Pro Tip: Cracker Barrel Country stores are great... They have tons of low-cost and quite universally likeable throw-away nick-nacks that you can pick up and keep in a closet of your house until an awkward "I don't know what to get this person" situation comes up. :P
  - deleted 5y ago
    [deleted]
  - smokey_the_bear 5y ago
    I don’t like getting Knickknacks, but my favorite kitchen accessories make good gifts for many people. Instant read thermometers, silicone oven mits, etc
    - denton-scratch 5y ago
      Err, no! I have rather a small kitchen, and I like cooking. In the same way that a carpenter prefers to choose his own tools, I prefer to choose my own kitchen implements. I'd prefer to receive consumable ingredients that can last a year or two on the shelf (no, not stem ginger in brandy, thanks all the same).
- jerlam 5y ago
lmkg 5y ago
I mean, it's all cultural. But the idea is that a gift is personal, and that cash is impersonal. The universality is exactly what makes it impersonal. The ideal gift (again, in US cultural context) is one that reflects something unique about the giver, or recipient, or the relationship between them. An exchange of cash is something that happens between strangers on a regular basis.
- mrfusion 5y ago
  Could it also be that it would get awkward if two people exchanged cash gifts and they were different amounts. (Also could get awkward if it was the same amount.)
  - philote 5y ago
    If it's a type of exchange where that may happen, then neither side likely needs the money. It's best to get just give a card. I think cash is more appropriate for parents/grandparents/aunts giving money to their kids/grandkids/etc, and less appropriate between peers. If you feel the need to get your peer something, then get them something you think they may like. If you don't know what that is, then IMO you should stick with a card or nothing at all. My family has been moving away from gift giving, in favor of spending time together instead. Show people you care for them all year long and don't buy in to these over-commercialized traditions.
- Symbiote 5y ago
  This is generally solved with a note alongside the cash. "Please treat yourself to a meal at my favourite restaurant, X." "I think you can buy some plants for the garden."
  - ska 5y ago
    > This is generally solved with a note alongside the cash. I think "solved" here should be "mitigated". Certainly culturally it seems lots of people don't consider this equivalent although logically it could be seen as "better".
  - 5y ago
cm2012 5y ago
“Every year I give Leslie the same present I give everyone. A crisp twenty dollar bill..."
mrfusion 5y ago
I wish this were a real thing: https://mobile.twitter.com/TwoClawsMedia/status/1210030954485633025 https://mobile.twitter.com/TwoClawsMedia/status/121003095448...
cosmojg 5y ago
The opposite is true in my circles. Cash is always appreciated while gift cards will earn you dirty looks from bystanders and an awkward, "Erm, uh, thanks!" from the recipient.
pdabbadabba 5y ago
Cash in a nice card can certainly be as good or better than a gift card. It's not necessarily a faux-pas. But it really depends on the situation. In some cases a gift card can be better if it is clear that the giver put some thought into the selection of the card (i.e., where it can be redeemed). There is something about the fact that the funds on a gift card can only be used in a restricted way that encourages the recipient to use it on something special. When I get cash, by contrast, I usually just put it in my bank account. I appreciate getting it, but its a different experience from a well selected gift card. (This can be at least partially addressed by including a note with the cash with some ideas on how to spend it.) Note, however, that I'm assuming that the gift card is well selected. In practice, I find that this is usually not the case--probably because the giver was simply looking for an alternative to giving cash. Under these circumstances I agree that cash is actually better. There are few gifts worse than a gift card to a restaurant you don't like, for products you aren't interested in, or to a totally generic store. I think the gold standard remains a thoughtful, nonmonetary gift. But that's often just not realistic. Edit: A sibling comment points out that this is all cultural. And they're exactly right. So I suppose I should specify that I'm a Christmas-celebrating American. YMMV for gift-giving holidays and rituals from other traditions.
- skinnymuch 5y ago
  The last two times, I’ve included a short url that redirects to a notion page personalized for the person. As in it includes the nickname or something. The page includes instructions on how to add the gift card to the store’s app and/or site (with an account). All relevant links included to make it as easy as possible. I also looked up apps that can be gift card aggregators and will include that next time too. —- I did a similar thing when I gifted Alexa Echo Show devices (the ones with a screen). These instructions included how to use a separate Amazon account so the device won’t get your contacts etc, if the person wants that privacy. Along with two 3 minute videos setting up the device and going over a few basic aspects of it. This would be a ton of work for one gift. I have now done this gift 5x and primarily to average technical people. Basically what I’m saying is. Gift giving is hard. It makes me super anxious and stressed. I think I’ve found my own niche/trick of including personalized instructions and information. I’ve never tried this on an equally techy person though!
tqi 5y ago
From the article: Personal financial columnists and comedians do not understand the jobs that gift cards do. They are not cash-but-worse-in-every-way. Closed loop cards allow a giver to personalize a gift to the recipient. A Barnes and Noble gift card to a favorite niece tells that niece that you remember she is a reader, unlike those uncreative family members who would just give her cash. If anyone’s psychology is being manipulated, it is likely the recipient, on a theory very similar to the one that causes many readers’ employers to offer a gym stipend instead of the equivalent amount of salary. You appreciate the money more, not less, because of the story about your relationship it comes with.
jimbokun 5y ago
My father in law would do things like taping bills to the bottom of a Nutella jar and wrapping that as a gift for grandkids. Was appreciated by all. Cash as a gift can be fun if you are creative with it.
- guptaneil 5y ago
  This. I recently got married and one of the gifts was a box of origami boats made from cash, with a nice card about how our marriage boat will take us on many great journeys. At the end of the day, it was cash but it really stuck out as an excellent gift.
IMTDb 5y ago
It really depends on the economic situation of the recipient. I am lucky enough to have more than enough money to maintain the life that I want to have. Giving me cash makes no material difference to me. It will most likely sit in a savings account for potentially the rest of my life. Don't do that especially if you need it (please!). Finding an actual "physical" gift can be hard, time consuming, stressful, would prompt you to spend more than you afford to "ensure a proper gift", etc. Gift cards for something I don't usually do is a relatively easy way to solve that. It's like saying "I know you can afford it, but you don't seem to XYZ that often, and maybe you'll like it". XYZ can be [discover a store], [try an experience], [visit some place] or anything else. If I know someone put a little money on that, I will honour that and hopefully discover something new, which is the best gift ever !. And you can put the exact amount that you feel comfortable putting (and in fact the amount itself does not really matter). But indeed, if the recipient is in any position where cash could be helpful, or if they are saving for a purpose (travel, house, child, ...). Just give cash instead.
kelnos 5y ago
I don't think it always is a faux-pas, and it depends on the recipient and your relationship with them. Some people believe that cash is an impersonal gift and that you should spend more effort to find a personal gift that the recipient would enjoy. I would find it weird if a friend came to my birthday party and gave me cash, but a gift of a nice whiskey or gin, or a silly joke gift, would feel normal. (Also no gift at all would be fine!) I've given cash as wedding gifts with the suggestion/hope that the couple spends it on something fun during their honeymoon (but of course they're free to spend it on whatever they like). Plenty of friends who I've talked to have agreed that cash is a fine wedding gift (and sometimes preferred). Most people set up gift registries for weddings, so it's not like the non-monetary gifts from the registry are a big surprise that required a lot of thought and personal attention on the giver's part. > Anyone who tries to put me down for doing so will simply not be receiving a gift from me next year Hell, anyone who complains in any way about a gift they've received should fall off the gift-giving list, regardless of what the gift was. Even if someone gives you a gift you don't like or won't use, the gracious thing is to accept it and give thanks. It really is the thought that counts. If you can re-purpose or re-gift it to someone who would actually appreciate it, and do it in a way that won't end up offending the gift-giver, all the better. I've heard the argument that you should tell the gift giver, because you don't want them to waste their money on something you don't like, but I'm not really persuaded by that. Maybe in some situations, but probably not most. Again, depends on the relationship between the people involved.
- denton-scratch 5y ago
  > I would find it weird if a friend came to my birthday party and gave me cash When I was twelve, my (much richer) friend came to my birthday party; but he didn't know it was my birthday. It was very impressive that on learing the facts, he immediately whipped out his wallet and gave me a tenner (I had never owned a tenner, and I didn't own a wallet).
yumraj 5y ago
Giving cash is common in India, and I believe several other Asian countries. Edit: In fact, in India it is common for folks to keep track of how much who gave, so that that a similar/slightly larger amount can be returned when the time comes. Edit2: Another cultural tidbit, in India generally you give an odd number ending in 1. Common gifts are 11, 21, 51, 101, 501, 1001 ...
- fma 5y ago
  Cash is common in China...or now a days, on WeChat you can send a "Red packet" of money to friends or in a groups. If you go to a wedding, you drop your red packet in a box...while in the US we have "gift registries" where a newly wed are forced to acquire physical possessions they may or may not need. I'm not sure why cash is taboo in US - I suspect it's derived from corporations trying to drive customers to purchase items, even gift cards. After all, $1 saved is $1 not spent and that's bad for profits /s.
ramchip 5y ago
It works until everyone does it. It's kind of weird when I give my mom cash in a card and she gives me cash in a card...
pavon 5y ago
Here's an idea to make a cash gift more fun. If I know a family member is trying to save up for something they want (that is either too pricey or too personalized to buy as a gift outright), I'll fold up some cash (origami style - sometimes with tape) in the shape of that item and send that as a gift to contribute to the purchase of the item. It shows you put some thought into the gift, while leaving them free to spend the money where and however they want. And carefully unfolding it all is a bit of payback for the creative wrapping some siblings like to do :)
- codazoda 5y ago
  Along those lines, my mother in law rolled up two dollar bills in a tin can. We were spending the bills all over town. They are rare enough that some places wondered if they were real. Your bank can probably get you as many as you need.
wildrhythms 5y ago
Even when people ask for specific gifts (think wedding registries... baby shower gift lists...) I still just gift them cash/Venmo with a personal message, usually double or triple whatever the gift ideas recommended. I do not care about the cultural strings attached, because if I was in the situation of asking for gifts- usually caused by a taboo of directly asking for money- I would be thankful for the cash. I see commenters here on HN talking about how 'thoughtful' a gift card is... no, a gift card is selfishly deciding how someone else should spend money that was supposed to be a gift.
teeray 5y ago
There’s also a meme of envelopes getting raided for the cash within them (“don’t send money through the mail”). I’ve never actually heard of anyone getting burned by this in modern times though. For sufficiently valuable gift cards (e.g. Amazon), the same hazard exists.
grishka 5y ago
> why it faux-pas to just put cash in a nice card Maybe it is in the US. Here in Russia it's kinda common to gift cash. There are even special cards for that. Many stores do sell gift cards, but I've yet to see someone buy or redeem one.
- skocznymroczny 5y ago
  In Poland, gift cards are relatively common, but not common enough. The problem is there are many different stores, and it might be hard to gauge which card the recipient would be interested in the most. For women, IKEA cards are common (for furniture). Empik (a store with books, board games, video games and some random third party stuff) is a popular gift card choice. So is Allegro (all kinds of products, started as Ebay-like service, these days is more like Amazon/Aliexpress connecting third party vendors to buyers). For gamers, Steam cards are not too bad.

a4isms 5y ago

“I think a gift card is a bad gift. You take money that is good everywhere...” (long pause, punctuated by applause and laughter) —Mitch Hedberg, 1968 - 2005

hamandcheese 5y ago

Is it? In my family it definitely isn’t.

ncpa-cpl 5y ago
My family accepts cash and equivalents for Christmas. The past four Christmas I've sent bank transfers on the 25th. Shopping malls, ATMs and banks get just too crowded those days.
mixmastamyk 5y ago
Probably some trade consortium trying to convince you that cash is looked down upon. I've yet to meet a younger person who didn't appreciate "cold hard cash" in a card, a la Lucy Van Pelt.
TigeriusKirk 5y ago
We make the same "hope it fits" joke every year and everyone still smiles, so I guess it works fine.

lhorie 5y ago

In chinese culture, it's a pretty normal thing to give red envelopes with cash inside[0] [0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_envelope https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_envelope

mikepurvis 5y ago
Those are a family thing, though. Other than at my wedding, I've only ever received a straight cash gift from family members (eg, grandparents).
- AussieWog93 5y ago
  Every Chinese kid gets these during the New Year celebrations. It's not a family thing so much as it's cultural.
  - mikepurvis 5y ago
    But mostly within families, right? Admittedly I don't have any first hand exposure to these customs, but are red envelopes being given at work parties or between adult friends? The Wikipedia article cited in this thread is a bit vague on this: "Red envelopes are gifts presented at social and family gatherings such as weddings or holidays such as Chinese New Year. The red color of the envelope symbolizes good luck and is a symbol to ward off evil spirits. It is also gifted when a person is visiting as a gesture of kindness for visiting. The act of requesting red packets is normally called tao hongbao or yao lishi, and in the south of China, dou li shi. Red envelopes are usually given out to the younger generation who are normally still in school or unemployed." I loved Sacred Economics and I'm all about figuring out how to reintegrate potlatching and other gift economy ideas into the western world. We desperately need mechanisms other than inheritance for transferring wealth to the younger generations. So I'd love to hear that these practices are occurring outside extended families, but that's not been my impression.
    - AussieWog93 5y ago
      I've definitely seen hongbao exchanged between adult friends in a wedding setting, but I'm not sure if this extends to the general case.
    - lhorie 5y ago
      I mean, it's "mostly within families" in the sense that most gifting occurs within family anywhere, but it certainly isn't restricted to familial contexts; you could definitely give them to friends, co-workers, teachers or other acquaintances. Traditionally, there's some nuances to it, e.g. it's often a tradition associated with visiting someone, and it is meant to have symbolic intent, meaning that it doesn't fit settings like secret santas.

oneoff786 5y ago

It’s not really a faux pas but it’s not very thoughtful. Receiving a small amount of money is also irrelevant to most middle class and above people.

mikepurvis 5y ago
I don't see a gift card as much more thoughtful than cash, but there's at least the slight push of "use this to spoil yourself" when it's something indulgent like Starbucks, the liquor store, Steam, whatever. Versus cash where you may have given it with that intent, but it just as easily ends up folded into the general pot and becoming something boring like gas, groceries, whatever.
- chongli 5y ago
  Yeah exactly. As the article points out, if you give someone a gift card to a book store knowing they’re an avid reader then that person will presumably use it to buy some books they really want to read. Then when they’re reading they’ll think of you and feel good. On the other hand, if you go out and just buy them some books they might smile and thank you sheepishly but then those books might sit unread on a shelf forever. People’s tastes can be very specific and so it may be very difficult to buy them a gift they’ll truly appreciate and enjoy unless you’re very close. It’s much easier to buy a gift card for a retailer (coffee, books, video games, makeup, fashion) in their area of interest than to try to buy something truly suited to their tastes. This is especially the case for casual acquaintances such as coworkers.

toomuchtodo 5y ago

I zelle’d (US instant payment system for participating financial institutions) someone their cash wedding gift, to heck with social convention.

sabujp 5y ago
this is the correct way, fast, no transaction fees, no one takes a cut
- kelnos 5y ago
  And safe and easy. Cash in an envelope could be lost, and then it's gone. A check could be lost and would need to be canceled and re-written. And either way you have to take an extra step to get it in your bank account. (At least with a check, most banks have a phone deposit option. You'd have to physically take the cash to a bank branch or at best ATM.)

stronglikedan 5y ago

I'm with you. Cash for adults. Toys for kids. If it discourages anyone from giving me a gift in the future, that's all the better. I like give giving, not gift exchanging.

LouisSayers 5y ago

If you're poor then it's definitely appreciated. If you've got money then it's nice, but doesn't have the same effect.

mavhc 5y ago

https://jeremyperson.com/2009/12/25/dilbert-christmas-gifts https://jeremyperson.com/2009/12/25/dilbert-christmas-gifts I'm terrible at gifts, but I'd never give cash/gift cards (cash that expires and you can only spend in one shop) The point of a gift is to show that you understand your friend/family member and have spent your own time to try to make them happy

geek_at 5y ago
I agree to an extent but if you know somebody is saving up for something (eg. niece saving up for a gaming pc) then it's a great gift to bring them closer to their goal. For a co-worker you should probably think a bit harder
- mavhc 5y ago
  If they ask for cash, fair enough
kelnos 5y ago
> cash that expires In some places, gift cards cannot legally expire. Other objections still apply, but fortunately not always that one, which I agree is gross.

cmckn 5y ago

I don’t think it is, at least not in my family. Cash is no more of a faux pas than a gift card, at least. I happen to think either is a pretty lame gift. Instead of a gift card to LUSH, for example, just buy me a bath bomb or whatever. Maybe I won’t like the scent you choose, maybe I’ll love it—that’s the nature of receiving a gift. Besides, gift cards are rarely enough to cover an actual purchase with taxes and etc added, so they often end up forcing the recipient to spend some of their own money (or they gather dust until they expire). I know some people are “hard to buy for” but this might be an indication that you shouldn’t be giving them a gift. If you don’t know them well enough to have a gift idea, or don’t feel comfortable asking for ideas, are you really obligated to get them something?

winternett 5y ago
Pro Tip: Cracker Barrel Country stores are great... They have tons of low-cost and quite universally likeable throw-away nick-nacks that you can pick up and keep in a closet of your house until an awkward "I don't know what to get this person" situation comes up. :P
- deleted 5y ago
  [deleted]
- smokey_the_bear 5y ago
  I don’t like getting Knickknacks, but my favorite kitchen accessories make good gifts for many people. Instant read thermometers, silicone oven mits, etc
  - denton-scratch 5y ago
    Err, no! I have rather a small kitchen, and I like cooking. In the same way that a carpenter prefers to choose his own tools, I prefer to choose my own kitchen implements. I'd prefer to receive consumable ingredients that can last a year or two on the shelf (no, not stem ginger in brandy, thanks all the same).
jerlam 5y ago

lmkg 5y ago

I mean, it's all cultural. But the idea is that a gift is personal, and that cash is impersonal. The universality is exactly what makes it impersonal. The ideal gift (again, in US cultural context) is one that reflects something unique about the giver, or recipient, or the relationship between them. An exchange of cash is something that happens between strangers on a regular basis.

mrfusion 5y ago
Could it also be that it would get awkward if two people exchanged cash gifts and they were different amounts. (Also could get awkward if it was the same amount.)
- philote 5y ago
  If it's a type of exchange where that may happen, then neither side likely needs the money. It's best to get just give a card. I think cash is more appropriate for parents/grandparents/aunts giving money to their kids/grandkids/etc, and less appropriate between peers. If you feel the need to get your peer something, then get them something you think they may like. If you don't know what that is, then IMO you should stick with a card or nothing at all. My family has been moving away from gift giving, in favor of spending time together instead. Show people you care for them all year long and don't buy in to these over-commercialized traditions.
Symbiote 5y ago
This is generally solved with a note alongside the cash. "Please treat yourself to a meal at my favourite restaurant, X." "I think you can buy some plants for the garden."
- ska 5y ago
  > This is generally solved with a note alongside the cash. I think "solved" here should be "mitigated". Certainly culturally it seems lots of people don't consider this equivalent although logically it could be seen as "better".
- 5y ago

cm2012 5y ago

“Every year I give Leslie the same present I give everyone. A crisp twenty dollar bill..."

mrfusion 5y ago

I wish this were a real thing: https://mobile.twitter.com/TwoClawsMedia/status/1210030954485633025 https://mobile.twitter.com/TwoClawsMedia/status/121003095448...

cosmojg 5y ago

The opposite is true in my circles. Cash is always appreciated while gift cards will earn you dirty looks from bystanders and an awkward, "Erm, uh, thanks!" from the recipient.

pdabbadabba 5y ago

Cash in a nice card can certainly be as good or better than a gift card. It's not necessarily a faux-pas. But it really depends on the situation. In some cases a gift card can be better if it is clear that the giver put some thought into the selection of the card (i.e., where it can be redeemed). There is something about the fact that the funds on a gift card can only be used in a restricted way that encourages the recipient to use it on something special. When I get cash, by contrast, I usually just put it in my bank account. I appreciate getting it, but its a different experience from a well selected gift card. (This can be at least partially addressed by including a note with the cash with some ideas on how to spend it.) Note, however, that I'm assuming that the gift card is well selected. In practice, I find that this is usually not the case--probably because the giver was simply looking for an alternative to giving cash. Under these circumstances I agree that cash is actually better. There are few gifts worse than a gift card to a restaurant you don't like, for products you aren't interested in, or to a totally generic store. I think the gold standard remains a thoughtful, nonmonetary gift. But that's often just not realistic. Edit: A sibling comment points out that this is all cultural. And they're exactly right. So I suppose I should specify that I'm a Christmas-celebrating American. YMMV for gift-giving holidays and rituals from other traditions.

skinnymuch 5y ago
The last two times, I’ve included a short url that redirects to a notion page personalized for the person. As in it includes the nickname or something. The page includes instructions on how to add the gift card to the store’s app and/or site (with an account). All relevant links included to make it as easy as possible. I also looked up apps that can be gift card aggregators and will include that next time too. —- I did a similar thing when I gifted Alexa Echo Show devices (the ones with a screen). These instructions included how to use a separate Amazon account so the device won’t get your contacts etc, if the person wants that privacy. Along with two 3 minute videos setting up the device and going over a few basic aspects of it. This would be a ton of work for one gift. I have now done this gift 5x and primarily to average technical people. Basically what I’m saying is. Gift giving is hard. It makes me super anxious and stressed. I think I’ve found my own niche/trick of including personalized instructions and information. I’ve never tried this on an equally techy person though!

tqi 5y ago

From the article: Personal financial columnists and comedians do not understand the jobs that gift cards do. They are not cash-but-worse-in-every-way. Closed loop cards allow a giver to personalize a gift to the recipient. A Barnes and Noble gift card to a favorite niece tells that niece that you remember she is a reader, unlike those uncreative family members who would just give her cash. If anyone’s psychology is being manipulated, it is likely the recipient, on a theory very similar to the one that causes many readers’ employers to offer a gym stipend instead of the equivalent amount of salary. You appreciate the money more, not less, because of the story about your relationship it comes with.

jimbokun 5y ago

My father in law would do things like taping bills to the bottom of a Nutella jar and wrapping that as a gift for grandkids. Was appreciated by all. Cash as a gift can be fun if you are creative with it.

guptaneil 5y ago
This. I recently got married and one of the gifts was a box of origami boats made from cash, with a nice card about how our marriage boat will take us on many great journeys. At the end of the day, it was cash but it really stuck out as an excellent gift.

IMTDb 5y ago

It really depends on the economic situation of the recipient. I am lucky enough to have more than enough money to maintain the life that I want to have. Giving me cash makes no material difference to me. It will most likely sit in a savings account for potentially the rest of my life. Don't do that especially if you need it (please!). Finding an actual "physical" gift can be hard, time consuming, stressful, would prompt you to spend more than you afford to "ensure a proper gift", etc. Gift cards for something I don't usually do is a relatively easy way to solve that. It's like saying "I know you can afford it, but you don't seem to XYZ that often, and maybe you'll like it". XYZ can be [discover a store], [try an experience], [visit some place] or anything else. If I know someone put a little money on that, I will honour that and hopefully discover something new, which is the best gift ever !. And you can put the exact amount that you feel comfortable putting (and in fact the amount itself does not really matter). But indeed, if the recipient is in any position where cash could be helpful, or if they are saving for a purpose (travel, house, child, ...). Just give cash instead.

kelnos 5y ago

I don't think it always is a faux-pas, and it depends on the recipient and your relationship with them. Some people believe that cash is an impersonal gift and that you should spend more effort to find a personal gift that the recipient would enjoy. I would find it weird if a friend came to my birthday party and gave me cash, but a gift of a nice whiskey or gin, or a silly joke gift, would feel normal. (Also no gift at all would be fine!) I've given cash as wedding gifts with the suggestion/hope that the couple spends it on something fun during their honeymoon (but of course they're free to spend it on whatever they like). Plenty of friends who I've talked to have agreed that cash is a fine wedding gift (and sometimes preferred). Most people set up gift registries for weddings, so it's not like the non-monetary gifts from the registry are a big surprise that required a lot of thought and personal attention on the giver's part. > Anyone who tries to put me down for doing so will simply not be receiving a gift from me next year Hell, anyone who complains in any way about a gift they've received should fall off the gift-giving list, regardless of what the gift was. Even if someone gives you a gift you don't like or won't use, the gracious thing is to accept it and give thanks. It really is the thought that counts. If you can re-purpose or re-gift it to someone who would actually appreciate it, and do it in a way that won't end up offending the gift-giver, all the better. I've heard the argument that you should tell the gift giver, because you don't want them to waste their money on something you don't like, but I'm not really persuaded by that. Maybe in some situations, but probably not most. Again, depends on the relationship between the people involved.

denton-scratch 5y ago
> I would find it weird if a friend came to my birthday party and gave me cash When I was twelve, my (much richer) friend came to my birthday party; but he didn't know it was my birthday. It was very impressive that on learing the facts, he immediately whipped out his wallet and gave me a tenner (I had never owned a tenner, and I didn't own a wallet).

yumraj 5y ago

Giving cash is common in India, and I believe several other Asian countries. Edit: In fact, in India it is common for folks to keep track of how much who gave, so that that a similar/slightly larger amount can be returned when the time comes. Edit2: Another cultural tidbit, in India generally you give an odd number ending in 1. Common gifts are 11, 21, 51, 101, 501, 1001 ...

fma 5y ago
Cash is common in China...or now a days, on WeChat you can send a "Red packet" of money to friends or in a groups. If you go to a wedding, you drop your red packet in a box...while in the US we have "gift registries" where a newly wed are forced to acquire physical possessions they may or may not need. I'm not sure why cash is taboo in US - I suspect it's derived from corporations trying to drive customers to purchase items, even gift cards. After all, $1 saved is $1 not spent and that's bad for profits /s.

ramchip 5y ago

It works until everyone does it. It's kind of weird when I give my mom cash in a card and she gives me cash in a card...

pavon 5y ago

Here's an idea to make a cash gift more fun. If I know a family member is trying to save up for something they want (that is either too pricey or too personalized to buy as a gift outright), I'll fold up some cash (origami style - sometimes with tape) in the shape of that item and send that as a gift to contribute to the purchase of the item. It shows you put some thought into the gift, while leaving them free to spend the money where and however they want. And carefully unfolding it all is a bit of payback for the creative wrapping some siblings like to do :)

codazoda 5y ago
Along those lines, my mother in law rolled up two dollar bills in a tin can. We were spending the bills all over town. They are rare enough that some places wondered if they were real. Your bank can probably get you as many as you need.

wildrhythms 5y ago

Even when people ask for specific gifts (think wedding registries... baby shower gift lists...) I still just gift them cash/Venmo with a personal message, usually double or triple whatever the gift ideas recommended. I do not care about the cultural strings attached, because if I was in the situation of asking for gifts- usually caused by a taboo of directly asking for money- I would be thankful for the cash. I see commenters here on HN talking about how 'thoughtful' a gift card is... no, a gift card is selfishly deciding how someone else should spend money that was supposed to be a gift.

teeray 5y ago

There’s also a meme of envelopes getting raided for the cash within them (“don’t send money through the mail”). I’ve never actually heard of anyone getting burned by this in modern times though. For sufficiently valuable gift cards (e.g. Amazon), the same hazard exists.

grishka 5y ago

> why it faux-pas to just put cash in a nice card Maybe it is in the US. Here in Russia it's kinda common to gift cash. There are even special cards for that. Many stores do sell gift cards, but I've yet to see someone buy or redeem one.

skocznymroczny 5y ago
In Poland, gift cards are relatively common, but not common enough. The problem is there are many different stores, and it might be hard to gauge which card the recipient would be interested in the most. For women, IKEA cards are common (for furniture). Empik (a store with books, board games, video games and some random third party stuff) is a popular gift card choice. So is Allegro (all kinds of products, started as Ebay-like service, these days is more like Amazon/Aliexpress connecting third party vendors to buyers). For gamers, Steam cards are not too bad.