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I don't believe men's genetics are more "varied" than women's. In fact I think that's the result of men being promoted more than women and in more disciplines w

I don't believe men's genetics are more "varied" than women's. In fact I think that's the result of men being promoted more than women and in more disciplines whereas women are expected to be lovers, child-bearers, and live casual lives. I do believe that it's much worse to be a below-average man than it is to be a below-average women, simply because people are usually more supportive of women. If you're a woman who isn't particularly smart, attractive, or talented, you still have the support of other women (who are usually more friendly) and men (who want to be your boyfriend/husband and take care of you). If you're a below-average man, nobody supports you - women just aren't interested (and you would be expected to take care of them anyways), and other men aren't interested because men are usually less friendly. I don't think any of the above is very controversial either. In fact most people realize there's an issue with many many miserable men. The main controversy is how to fix this issue. Some lonely / ugly / socially-awkward men are really aggressive and dangerous towards women, and it's hard to tell which ones. I absolutely agree with you that it would really help if men are less cold around other strange men and try to talk / learn about them. In fact there's not much reason not to be friendly towards other men, or to be scared of them. Unlike with women, a strange man can't necessarily overpower you, and he's unlikely to be creepy towards you, his interest is more likely to be genuine. The main issue IMO is that lots of men just don't care much about talking with strangers, and can't really tell when someone needs human interaction.

verve_rat 5y ago
>I don't believe men's genetics are more "varied" than women's. That's cool, that's cool. You believe what you want. Question to anyone reading this: What (if there is any) does the research say?
- WithinReason 5y ago
  Research agrees: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Variability_hypothesis#Modern_studies https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Variability_hypothesis#Modern_...
  - Sammi 5y ago
    "Research agrees that there indeed is more variability in males" would have been much clearer to me :) I had to click the link and read some of the article to be sure what you meant.
    - WithinReason 5y ago
      Noted!
fho 5y ago
I've been a member of a "mens round table" [1]. The organizer was a friend of mine and wanted to include me because (from his point of view) I was doing alright in life [2]. While not the target audience the group comprised mostly young 20-30 yo men, who were searching for their place in life. Bluntly generalizing their problems revolved around insecurity and not finding a partner. Actually most of them dropped out after eventually finding somebody. Surprisingly (to me), another major issue that was discussed was problems with parents. This expressed in different ways, but was mostly "why don't you have a job/wife/family/house/etc yet?". [1] "We are not a support group!" [2] Surprise ... I am not :-)
commandlinefan 5y ago
> In fact there's not much reason not to be friendly towards other men I get what you mean here, but when I was a kid, I was friends with everybody. It never occurred to me to not be, until I found out that, especially as an adolescent, you're judged by the company you keep (by both boys and girls). If you're friends with a bunch of "losers", you're a loser too. That's a stigma you can't escape, either. I learned in my teens to be way more aloof than I'm naturally inclined to be as a survival tactic. There's less teenage drama as you get older but in reality it doesn't completely go away: there are still people (especially women) who will avoid you if your associate circle is too unimpressive.

verve_rat 5y ago

>I don't believe men's genetics are more "varied" than women's. That's cool, that's cool. You believe what you want. Question to anyone reading this: What (if there is any) does the research say?

WithinReason 5y ago
Research agrees: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Variability_hypothesis#Modern_studies https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Variability_hypothesis#Modern_...
- Sammi 5y ago
  "Research agrees that there indeed is more variability in males" would have been much clearer to me :) I had to click the link and read some of the article to be sure what you meant.
  - WithinReason 5y ago
    Noted!

fho 5y ago

I've been a member of a "mens round table" [1]. The organizer was a friend of mine and wanted to include me because (from his point of view) I was doing alright in life [2]. While not the target audience the group comprised mostly young 20-30 yo men, who were searching for their place in life. Bluntly generalizing their problems revolved around insecurity and not finding a partner. Actually most of them dropped out after eventually finding somebody. Surprisingly (to me), another major issue that was discussed was problems with parents. This expressed in different ways, but was mostly "why don't you have a job/wife/family/house/etc yet?". [1] "We are not a support group!" [2] Surprise ... I am not :-)

commandlinefan 5y ago

> In fact there's not much reason not to be friendly towards other men I get what you mean here, but when I was a kid, I was friends with everybody. It never occurred to me to not be, until I found out that, especially as an adolescent, you're judged by the company you keep (by both boys and girls). If you're friends with a bunch of "losers", you're a loser too. That's a stigma you can't escape, either. I learned in my teens to be way more aloof than I'm naturally inclined to be as a survival tactic. There's less teenage drama as you get older but in reality it doesn't completely go away: there are still people (especially women) who will avoid you if your associate circle is too unimpressive.