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The biggest reality check in my life was working at an engineering firm with a bunch of near retirement baby boomers with no children. They all came across ass

The biggest reality check in my life was working at an engineering firm with a bunch of near retirement baby boomers with no children. They all came across ass listless, unhappy, and living a life with no greater purpose. It was unquestionably one of the ugliest things I have ever seen. As you get older and friends drift and pass away family is one of the most important things in life. I know anti-natalism is hip right now but it makes me sad to think of all the millennials and gen-z who will reach their 50s and 60s when it is too late and be stuck in a life without purpose.

yoyohello13 5y ago
I think this is dependent on the people. I’ve also seen many couples who couldn’t have kids that have very fulfilling lives. They volunteer, are active in and well liked by the community. I think meaning can come from many places. Kids are an almost guaranteed source but you can find meaning without children if you look for it. This might just be wishful thinking on my part since I’m unable to have kids, but I’d like to think I’m not destined for a lonely meaningless future.
- joeberon 5y ago
  I've also seen many people who have had kids who have flown the nest who now do not have fulfilling lives.
- TedDoesntTalk 5y ago
  I had a great uncle and aunt who could not have children. They lived to their mid/late 80s. They were definitely not living a life without meaning. It definitely is possible. I saw it.
wavefunction 5y ago
Life has whatever purpose you give to it. That's it.
- abfan1127 5y ago
  while true, I think many people struggle to give as deep a purpose to (hiking, being a foodie, knitting) as investing in another person. Not that it isn't possible. Its just a challenge. Not that being a parent isn't a challenge either.
- rootusrootus 5y ago
  Yes, but is fundamentally true that humans don't really have any other reason for existence than to make more humans. So it makes sense that it's the easy button for manufacturing purpose.
  - EVa5I7bHFq9mnYK 5y ago
    You can work as an obstetrician to the same end.
    - rootusrootus 5y ago
      I don't know if I'd rate that as easy, however. LOL
joeberon 5y ago
See, to me the fact that you can only find true meaning in your life by having children is totally bizarre. Are you somehow not aware that it is simply a biological imperative for you? I'm not having kids, and if I regret it, who cares? My personal feeling of life satisfaction, determined by the biological feeling of wanting to procreate, is not worth the stress put on both myself and the planet of having children. The idea that we must fundamentally be beholden to recreation is a disgusting relic. There are, thankfully, ways to overcome these ways that our monkey brain controls us (ask the Buddhists, for example) Explain to me exactly how does having children give life purpose any more than drinking beer or writing a piece of music or whatever? It doesn't intrinsically, it is entirely subjective, and it is just another feeling. You can be free of being a slave to that feeling, as many millennials and gen-z, and people throughout history, have discovered.
hsn915 5y ago
All the old but happy people I know have children (and grand children). The more, the happier. All the grumpy old people I know have no children, or just one. On a day to day bases, it might feel like taking care of children is plenty stressful, but in the long run it's the ultimate form of joy/happiness.
- EVa5I7bHFq9mnYK 5y ago
  Maybe it's the other way around? Grumpy people don't fxxc.
deleted 5y ago
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mypalmike 5y ago
You must not live in the US. Statistically speaking anyhow. https://time.com/4370344/parents-happiness-children-study/ https://time.com/4370344/parents-happiness-children-study/
deleted 5y ago
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jokethrowaway 5y ago
Totally agree with you. I noticed that trend as well. Maybe millennials will retain their friendship and they will be doing stupid tik-toks as 60 years old.
gamechangr 5y ago
It is super popular to be against the idea that kids will add value in your life. I am not sure Hacker News is the right demographic to understand the value of parenthood. Most parents would agree that having kids is life changing for the better.
- yoyohello13 5y ago
  > I am not sure Hacker News is the right demographic to understand the value of parenthood. I don't know. Seems like I see a comment espousing the joys of parenthood almost every day on here.

yoyohello13 5y ago

I think this is dependent on the people. I’ve also seen many couples who couldn’t have kids that have very fulfilling lives. They volunteer, are active in and well liked by the community. I think meaning can come from many places. Kids are an almost guaranteed source but you can find meaning without children if you look for it. This might just be wishful thinking on my part since I’m unable to have kids, but I’d like to think I’m not destined for a lonely meaningless future.

joeberon 5y ago
I've also seen many people who have had kids who have flown the nest who now do not have fulfilling lives.
TedDoesntTalk 5y ago
I had a great uncle and aunt who could not have children. They lived to their mid/late 80s. They were definitely not living a life without meaning. It definitely is possible. I saw it.

wavefunction 5y ago

Life has whatever purpose you give to it. That's it.

abfan1127 5y ago
while true, I think many people struggle to give as deep a purpose to (hiking, being a foodie, knitting) as investing in another person. Not that it isn't possible. Its just a challenge. Not that being a parent isn't a challenge either.
rootusrootus 5y ago
Yes, but is fundamentally true that humans don't really have any other reason for existence than to make more humans. So it makes sense that it's the easy button for manufacturing purpose.
- EVa5I7bHFq9mnYK 5y ago
  You can work as an obstetrician to the same end.
  - rootusrootus 5y ago
    I don't know if I'd rate that as easy, however. LOL

joeberon 5y ago

See, to me the fact that you can only find true meaning in your life by having children is totally bizarre. Are you somehow not aware that it is simply a biological imperative for you? I'm not having kids, and if I regret it, who cares? My personal feeling of life satisfaction, determined by the biological feeling of wanting to procreate, is not worth the stress put on both myself and the planet of having children. The idea that we must fundamentally be beholden to recreation is a disgusting relic. There are, thankfully, ways to overcome these ways that our monkey brain controls us (ask the Buddhists, for example) Explain to me exactly how does having children give life purpose any more than drinking beer or writing a piece of music or whatever? It doesn't intrinsically, it is entirely subjective, and it is just another feeling. You can be free of being a slave to that feeling, as many millennials and gen-z, and people throughout history, have discovered.

hsn915 5y ago

All the old but happy people I know have children (and grand children). The more, the happier. All the grumpy old people I know have no children, or just one. On a day to day bases, it might feel like taking care of children is plenty stressful, but in the long run it's the ultimate form of joy/happiness.

EVa5I7bHFq9mnYK 5y ago
Maybe it's the other way around? Grumpy people don't fxxc.

deleted 5y ago

[deleted]

mypalmike 5y ago

You must not live in the US. Statistically speaking anyhow. https://time.com/4370344/parents-happiness-children-study/ https://time.com/4370344/parents-happiness-children-study/

deleted 5y ago

[deleted]

jokethrowaway 5y ago

Totally agree with you. I noticed that trend as well. Maybe millennials will retain their friendship and they will be doing stupid tik-toks as 60 years old.

gamechangr 5y ago

It is super popular to be against the idea that kids will add value in your life. I am not sure Hacker News is the right demographic to understand the value of parenthood. Most parents would agree that having kids is life changing for the better.

yoyohello13 5y ago
> I am not sure Hacker News is the right demographic to understand the value of parenthood. I don't know. Seems like I see a comment espousing the joys of parenthood almost every day on here.