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Upvoted, unfortunately it happened to me. I out-earned my spouse by 4x and lost everything when she decided she wasn't happy. Do not expect any gratitude : You

Upvoted, unfortunately it happened to me. I out-earned my spouse by 4x and lost everything when she decided she wasn't happy. Do not expect any gratitude : You have no idea who your ex-wife until you meet her in family court. My ex wife took half of our (my) assets (including my 401k). The lawyers took what was left as I was fighting to prevent her from moving away 3'000 miles with our kids (I had to pay for both her and my lawyer) In the end my ex wife won her move away. I lost my kids and I am now stuck paying more than half my salary in child support + child support add-ons such as private school, nannies, healthcare. The remaining of my salary is spent on travel across the country once a month to be able to see my kids. It is a very risk bet... you don't have much to win and a lot to loose if you are a men (custody) and the higher earner.

throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago
Upvoting everything you have said. Feeling sorry for you too.
throwawaymariag 5y ago
I helped mine move to this country and find an occupation that was earning $130k and growing multiple digits% every year. Then she must have heard about California divorces... Rather than staying in our unhappy marriage (arguably not anyone's particular fault) because she thought she had to, she filed, got half of everything, even stuff that was arguably more mine that hers. I'd always been a marriage skeptic... When we moved to the US we got married, because that's how we could continue our relationship. I thought I was smart when I insisted to sign a pre-nup in our country of origin. I didn't suspect California would not see the pre-nup that way - Why would I be more careful then and research it in more details?: We were in love then. The news that the prenup would be contested was the first bitter news. (California doesn't yet have a case that went in front of a judge about that country's prenup validity). When we settled, she cashed in, and immediately after, announced to me, that in fact, she was unhappy here, and that she was going back to our country of origin (2nd bitter news). I get to keep the kids (thank god) here with me. But she has long stopped working and I'll support her early retirement with monthly payments that are huge money where she is going. Why would she even work there? She has until the kids get 18 to figure the plan for after, and the assets she has from the settlement, if invested right, will cover even that (+ she has a new fiancee anyway). Yes marriage is antiquated -- I had a "modern" marriage where I was super involved (cooking, taking care of the house and the kids), and a traditional "fuck you" divorce.

throwaway_sjfgd 5y ago

Upvoting everything you have said. Feeling sorry for you too.

throwawaymariag 5y ago

I helped mine move to this country and find an occupation that was earning $130k and growing multiple digits% every year. Then she must have heard about California divorces... Rather than staying in our unhappy marriage (arguably not anyone's particular fault) because she thought she had to, she filed, got half of everything, even stuff that was arguably more mine that hers. I'd always been a marriage skeptic... When we moved to the US we got married, because that's how we could continue our relationship. I thought I was smart when I insisted to sign a pre-nup in our country of origin. I didn't suspect California would not see the pre-nup that way - Why would I be more careful then and research it in more details?: We were in love then. The news that the prenup would be contested was the first bitter news. (California doesn't yet have a case that went in front of a judge about that country's prenup validity). When we settled, she cashed in, and immediately after, announced to me, that in fact, she was unhappy here, and that she was going back to our country of origin (2nd bitter news). I get to keep the kids (thank god) here with me. But she has long stopped working and I'll support her early retirement with monthly payments that are huge money where she is going. Why would she even work there? She has until the kids get 18 to figure the plan for after, and the assets she has from the settlement, if invested right, will cover even that (+ she has a new fiancee anyway). Yes marriage is antiquated -- I had a "modern" marriage where I was super involved (cooking, taking care of the house and the kids), and a traditional "fuck you" divorce.