4 ms·
> I’ve often wondered why, in a poor country where women work as hard as men to feed their children, feminine softness is so highly prized. As for me, I no long
by emodendroket 5y ago
> I’ve often wondered why, in a poor country where women work as hard as men to feed their children, feminine softness is so highly prized. As for me, I no longer consider it a valuable attribute.
Isn't this its own answer? It's prized precisely because it is unattainable for most.
- somtoxhi 5y ago> Isn't this its own answer? It's prized precisely because it is unattainable for most. No, the question is why value softness so highly when you cannot survive without "hardness", when as a soft woman, you cannot even feed your children. Softness will lead to death.
- SideburnsOfDoom 5y agoBecause she's describing what is more accurately self-effacing stoicism, and subservience, not precisely "softness"? Endurance and self-sacrifice are not soft. e.g.: > A good Asian woman is supposed to shine dimly, like a moon, and reflect her husband’s sunlight. Not that she's completely sold on that model either.
- CRConrad 5y ago> > A good Asian woman is supposed to shine dimly, like a moon, and reflect her husband’s sunlight. > Not that she's completely sold on that model either. As I read it, that is the "softness" / "stoicism" she's talking about. She's just exemplifying.
- SuoDuanDao 5y ago>Endurance and self-sacrifice are not soft. I'm probably reading too much into this, but there tends to be a tradeoff between 'hardness' and 'toughness'. 'Endurance' requires some flexibility and ability to absorb/disperse energy that may require some degree of 'softness'.
- scollet 5y agoWhat?
- fxtentacle 5y agoThat explanation doesn't work for me. Women in Germany at my age never had a shortage of anything. Yet most of them present themselves as strong and fiercely competitive. It's rare to see a German woman embrace her softer side or act playfully in public.
- emodendroket 5y agoIf it doesn’t, then think about foot binding in China. It was supposedly beautiful, but it also advertised something about your social status if you could afford to deliberately render your daughters useless for field work. Consider also the traditional Western reverence for fair skin being replaced with an appreciation for tans (first indicating that you could avoid field work, then later that you could afford vacations).
- jesussaves 5y agoFunny reading your comment I can totally understand why. the world would be a better place if people like you could realize why you should keep your mouth shut.
- the_gipsy 5y agoThe context is quite different. In a “shortage” context, women must survive both against poverty and a patriarchal society, at the same time. In Germany they are free of both.
- bilbo0s 5y agoNot sure this holds up. I'm extremely familiar with subsaharan Africa. Whether a tribe is patriarchal, egalitarian, or matriarchal in nature, you tend to observe the females "embracing softness". I don't have an answer as to why that is, but the "scarcity" theory is consistent with my observations. The "social organization" theory is not. That's not to say that "scarcity" theory is correct, only that it isn't contradicted by observation in the same way that "social organization" theory is.
- deleted 5y ago[deleted]
- scotty79 5y agoSomehow that makes me think of fathers in western countries seriously imagining lives of their sons as foodball stars and even attempting to work towards this imagined future.