11 ms·

The 'specialness spiral:' Why we label ordinary objects as too special to use

57 points by Kaibeezy 5y ago

Kaibeezy 5y ago
Guilty AF. I always attributed it to having a good memory, overloading objects with meaningful stories, and then being unwilling to let them go for fear of losing the memory trigger. Similarly, my fridge is full of nearly empty jars and bottles of interesting sauces and condiments. If I chuck it, how will I remember to buy that one again?
- mandmandam 5y ago
  Try taking a photo to commemorate that special jar of mold; it helps let go.
  - prionassembly 5y ago
    Rarely does the special jar of mold photograph well. The light hits it in so many different ways. Also, we want to see the thing age. I feel the same about paper books. I kind of even regret that so many books come in non-yellowing paper now.
    - AnimalMuppet 5y ago
      Your user name is kind of interesting in connection to your first paragraph...
    - alpaca128 5y ago
      This reminds me so much of The Milk at some university that a student many years ago left behind and has never been thrown away since then.
      - alt219 5y ago
        Some history of The Milk: https://alum.mit.edu/slice/investigating-milk-mits-historic-dairy-product https://alum.mit.edu/slice/investigating-milk-mits-historic-...
  - Sophistifunk 5y ago
    "I was breeding that mould! His name was Albert!"
    - Kaibeezy 5y ago
      Aaaactually, I had some leftover refried beans turn into Boris Johnson. Whatta head of hair! (/rummages around for Imgur password)
- ilikepi 5y ago
  > Similarly, my fridge is full of nearly empty jars and bottles of interesting sauces and condiments. If I chuck it, how will I remember to buy that one again? A photo album on your phone might help...you could even mark up each photo with text to remind you what you liked about each thing.
  - ImprovedSilence 5y ago
    Absolutely great idea. I do it for hot sauces and beverages. Also recipes and grilling times and stuff too, just take a pic or screen grab, & throw it in the album.
- bentcorner 5y ago
  I used to do this a lot as a kid. I still do it, but I used to, too. I got a can of Barq's soda as a kid, during a road trip to another city. It wasn't sold in my city so I saved it for something special. It must have sat in my room for years before I realized how ridiculous it was and threw it away. Part of it was that by that time you could easily by Barq's soda in my city.
poulsbohemian 5y ago
This is exactly why I will sneak expensive bottles of wine onto the table on a school night. Gotta enjoy it while you can.
jrochkind1 5y ago
> To find out, we ran another experiment in which participants imagined buying a bottle of wine. We had half of the participants imagine considering opening it one night, but deciding not to. This is the second study like this on HN in a couple weeks. When the heck did asking participants to imagine something and then asking them how they felt, and assuming this tells you something valid about things other than imagining things... when did this become a popular form of research? It seems crazy to me.
- verve_rat 5y ago
  Seems like you could probably do some effective and efficient research using games. I always have to force myself to use the one shot super weapon, or even a few grenades, in order to not end the game without ever using them. Video games seem like the perfect arena in which to do and apply this research.
  - samplatt 5y ago
    In a lifetime of regret and missed opportunities, this is one area at least where I've learned my lesson. I can now go through a whole game and use all the "special" stuff that I'm given, and usually even at the appropriate times! Kinda proud. It sounds silly but it took a lot of letting go.
    - didsomeonesay 5y ago
      It's not silly, you found a dojo for practicing "letting go"! Hope your can transfer this to life. Will try your method if i ever find the appropriate time to play the "special" games on the steam backlog...
  - bentcorner 5y ago
    RPG players do this all the time - they save those health and mana potions for a time they really need it, and invariably never do. Games that streamline these mechanics by making recovery items more fungible lose a little personality but are probably easier to balance.
contravariant 5y ago
Is it just me does this seem like some flimsy research? I mean asking people to choose between two types of paper and observing that people who choose type A are more likely to choose type A the next time is hardly conclusive evidence of anything. It'd be weirder if it didn't happen. And if you ask people for reasons why they shouldn't open a bottle of wine just yet they're obviously going to suggest that they're waiting for a better occasion. For something that doesn't even seem like much of a problem, or at least hasn't been established to be a problem by anything other than the author's gut feeling, this all doesn't seem to amount to much more than just affirming people's preconceptions.
- derefr 5y ago
  > For something that doesn't even seem like much of a problem Presumably the author’s occupation, “marketing science”, is interested in getting people to use things (and use them up) so that they’ll need to buy more of them, so that they a marketer can then sell them those things.
- memco 5y ago
  Quite! The article doesn't start off on a great note: > Fast forward to today. I have never worn my Target blouse. What had started out as ordinary now holds a special place in my closet, and no occasion feels quite worthy of my wearing it. > What happened here? Why do people own so many unused possessions, treating them as though they are too special to use? One person bought a blouse they don't wear and then extrapolate that people own so many unused possessions? Where is the data that shows how many people have unused possessions, how much of their possessions are unused and how many of those are unused due to their specialness? The article does build a decent case that the idea that once something is assigned a special status that status becomes amplified in an interesting way that should be investigated, but isn't itself a good investigation of that effect.
MarkusWandel 5y ago
One way out of this is if the special item somehow becomes worthless over time. A food item that spoils, clothing that goes so hopelessly out of style that you can never wear it, gadgets that are no longer compatible with anything. Another is if you can convince yourself that it'll be just as special to some other person, then pass it on to them. But in that case, don't ask about it later, in case you were wrong.
- iJohnDoe 5y ago
  This is the solution. It’s important for people to realize this. Once people realize that those special items are going to waste, then hopefully a positive change can happen, and those items can be used instead of collecting dust and going to waste.
scrooched_moose 5y ago
I've probably given away 15-20 endgrain cutting boards over the last few Christmases to various family and friends - nothing fancy, just random pattern to use up scrap from other projects instead of tossing it in the fire pit. I know of at least 4 that have never been used for anything but serving trays because they're "special". I find it hilarious every time - they're made to be used and abused. I've told every one of them "if you actually manage to use it enough to damage it, I'll just make you another one", but they still sit there in pristine condition.
- matkoniecz 5y ago
  I guess that they already have cutting boards (and this one is not superior in this role), but their trays were uglier than this one. So keeping it in "pretty tray" role makes sense.
- soylentnewsorg 5y ago
  you gave people who know you your time, your thoughtfulness, and your acquired and honed skill. those are not cutting boards - they are photographs of a moment. anywise, the way to solve your issue is to give them a second cutting board - then the first one becomes a non-scarce commodity and both will likely get used.
  - nathannecro 5y ago
    I like this perspective. I think it applies well to many things we collect. I've been collecting fountain pens for more than a decade now and I've observed that new collectors end up buying their "trophy" pen only to have it remain uninked and kept in a drawer someplace. It's only a few more years later, when another "trophy" is inevitably collected, that both pens see use.
    - stevekemp 5y ago
      Similar story with watch-collectors - some people buy their grail, then leave it in a safe. There's a big mismatch between people who have "pristine" watches, and those that have seen life and suffered the inevitable scratches, dents, and damage.
Groxx 5y ago
>Interestingly, participants who had the initial opportunity to use the notebook, but hadn't, were significantly less likely to use the notebook later in the session, versus those who hadn't had the option. And this finding was not limited just to notebooks. We saw the same pattern in other scenario-based experiments using bottles of wine and TV episodes. eeeehhhhhhhh.... I dunno. "People who don't do a thing once are less likely to do it the next time" seems like it would explain this as well or better, and it's a simpler explanation. And I don't buy that the imaginary-wine followup question implies "more special" either. By telling them that they did not open it immediately, they've set up that initial "did not use" - there are many reasons to not-use something, many of which work in future unspecified scenarios as well. That doesn't imply it is growing less likely to be used with each event, maintenance is sufficient. --- I absolutely agree that some things for some people fall into this kind of spiral. They also get out of it sometimes - I've personally had or seen quite a few "argh, why do we even have this?! [use it or lose it]" sequences. But I think more fall into knickknack-like territory - they were never going to be used, adding more time doesn't change that. It's closer to an emotional attachment to something, and not wanting to lose it. There's no ideal future where it will be used.
ModernMech 5y ago
My grandmother had an oriental rug that no one was allowed to step on. For 40 years she tried to keep this rug pristine because she was going to sell it one day. Anytime any of us grandchildren or even the eventual great grandchildren stepped on it, they would get a harsh scolding. She died never having sold that rug, but after her death there was a lot of fighting over who would get the thing. It tore our family apart, the arguing over it. Finally the victor took it to an auction house to get it appraised and sold. It was worthless. They put it up for auction and no one wanted it. Eventually the auction house asked us if we wanted them to dispose of it for a fee. I think about this a lot when I consider letting go of material possessions. That rug has become sort of a symbol to me, of the encumbering nature of our possessions. Or maybe it was just a conduit for my grandmother’s undiagnosed mental health issues. Either way I try to live with fewer things in my life these days.
- im3w1l 5y ago
  Specialness fascinates me. And the pointless rituals that goes along with it. They have a strong effect on us, which in some sense makes them not pointless. Like placebo, inert in itself, but effective because we make it so. It's a good story, and if not for the arguments over who would get it, I could see it having been a nice anchor to remember eccentric old grandma.
- weq 5y ago
  Watching shows like pawn stars, or american pickers, or car sos, you see many ways that these types of though processes can play out. So many people goto the grave never getting around to there hopes and dreams. To the day they die. Often the familys of these people have no idea what todo with these posessions, and its interesting how often their the most treasured item ends up being the least appreciated asset of there estate.
bluedino 5y ago
I have some external hard drives, and some internal SSD's, as well as some USB thumbdrives, brand new in the package. Haven't found anything to store on them yet. I keep re-using old ones. Eventually I'll find one a few years later in some tiny (relative to current sizes) and laugh at how I never used it and originally paid $250 for it.
- nextaccountic 5y ago
  Just use them for backups!
aimor 5y ago
At some point I had a moment of realization that most things are meant to be used. That is, those fancy decorative soaps smell better on your hands than on the shelf, chocolates taste better in your mouth than in the box, if someone gives you a gift they want to enjoy it. Unsurprisingly I agree with the article's advice: use the things you have as soon as it's appropriate to use them. Light candles for dinner, write in the margins of your books, eat off china with silverware. This makes ordinary moments more enjoyable and more special.
- KozmoNau7 5y ago
  Exactly, things have a purpose and more often than not, that purpose is to be used up, possibly repaired and then used again, until it finally wears out or breaks completely. I tend to baby new things until the feeling of novelty wear off, then I just use them. I don't abuse them, but I stop trying to avoid normal wear and tear. Repairing things is also something I find relaxing and interesting. As a consequence, I tend to stick to things that are durable and can be repaired, designs and materials that have stood the test of time, and I keep them for as long as I can. A well-worn patina on an obviously beloved object is hard to fake.
hlesesne 5y ago
I can’t think of a single thing I own that I feel this way about. Yet, I feel like I spend and spend on the things that don’t actually inspire me. Is there an inverse relationship between good stewardship/financial maturity and the number of lines or code I commit? Feels like it.
- criddell 5y ago
  I have things that are special to me, but nothing that is too special to never be used. In the past I think I've had similar feelings to what you describe: I buy a lot of stuff, but it's just stuff. These days if I'm going to buy something, I get what I think is the best one and if I can't afford that, I wait until I can. I probably over spend on some stuff, but the wait also leads to me buying fewer things. I'm still not sentimental about physical things though. I have no qualms about giving away or selling things that were given to me as gifts or bequeathments.
bitwize 5y ago
I'm reminded of that one special potion that sits and sits and sits in your inventory, unused, because once it's used it will be gone and where will you find another one? Megalixirs (restore all HP and MP to all party members) and Hero Drinks (the same, plus temporary invincibility to all) are likely candidates in Final Fantasy games, but in Final Fantasy XII Ethers (restore some MP to one character) are incredibly rare and MP recharges slowly over time anyways so why use them? You might need them later...
jrootabega 5y ago
I have noticed the opposite phenomenon: at some point I lose my reverence for new things and start treating them poorly. Usually electronics like a new phone, new laptop, new headset. When they're new, I feel their value in their weight and physical characteristics. Once I get used to that, they start feeling commonplace and I treat them carelessly, and don't even really feel bad about it.
JoeAltmaier 5y ago
I buy last-year's special thing, and use it up. Phones, cars, bicycles, whatever. It was good enough last year, so it must be pretty good. And I treat it like a tool. Saves a lot of money too. I long ago categorized that 'too good to use' impulse as a childish one. As a kid I wouldn't want to use up a new box of crayons or whatever, and would end up never using them much at all. Later I recognized this as a feeling that I wasn't good enough for nice things. I consciously shed that attitude, and taught my children to be confident enough to open everything and use it up. Life is too short.
- ip26 5y ago
  In my case I later realized it was due to being not very well-off with multiple siblings. Once I used up that box of crayons, that very well may have been my last set of crayons. Of course, in reality crayons that you can't use are not that much better than crayons you don't have.
jrootabega 5y ago
I remember as a kid my parents brought me a nice rubber ducky. I was very upset when they told me it was marzipan and I was supposed to eat it, after which it would no longer exist. It may have also been a marshmallow peep.

57 points by Kaibeezy 5y ago

Guilty AF. I always attributed it to having a good memory, overloading objects with meaningful stories, and then being unwilling to let them go for fear of losing the memory trigger. Similarly, my fridge is full of nearly empty jars and bottles of interesting sauces and condiments. If I chuck it, how will I remember to buy that one again?

mandmandam 5y ago
Try taking a photo to commemorate that special jar of mold; it helps let go.
- prionassembly 5y ago
  Rarely does the special jar of mold photograph well. The light hits it in so many different ways. Also, we want to see the thing age. I feel the same about paper books. I kind of even regret that so many books come in non-yellowing paper now.
  - AnimalMuppet 5y ago
    Your user name is kind of interesting in connection to your first paragraph...
  - alpaca128 5y ago
    This reminds me so much of The Milk at some university that a student many years ago left behind and has never been thrown away since then.
    - alt219 5y ago
      Some history of The Milk: https://alum.mit.edu/slice/investigating-milk-mits-historic-dairy-product https://alum.mit.edu/slice/investigating-milk-mits-historic-...
- Sophistifunk 5y ago
  "I was breeding that mould! His name was Albert!"
  - Kaibeezy 5y ago
    Aaaactually, I had some leftover refried beans turn into Boris Johnson. Whatta head of hair! (/rummages around for Imgur password)
ilikepi 5y ago
> Similarly, my fridge is full of nearly empty jars and bottles of interesting sauces and condiments. If I chuck it, how will I remember to buy that one again? A photo album on your phone might help...you could even mark up each photo with text to remind you what you liked about each thing.
- ImprovedSilence 5y ago
  Absolutely great idea. I do it for hot sauces and beverages. Also recipes and grilling times and stuff too, just take a pic or screen grab, & throw it in the album.
bentcorner 5y ago
I used to do this a lot as a kid. I still do it, but I used to, too. I got a can of Barq's soda as a kid, during a road trip to another city. It wasn't sold in my city so I saved it for something special. It must have sat in my room for years before I realized how ridiculous it was and threw it away. Part of it was that by that time you could easily by Barq's soda in my city.

poulsbohemian 5y ago

This is exactly why I will sneak expensive bottles of wine onto the table on a school night. Gotta enjoy it while you can.

jrochkind1 5y ago

> To find out, we ran another experiment in which participants imagined buying a bottle of wine. We had half of the participants imagine considering opening it one night, but deciding not to. This is the second study like this on HN in a couple weeks. When the heck did asking participants to imagine something and then asking them how they felt, and assuming this tells you something valid about things other than imagining things... when did this become a popular form of research? It seems crazy to me.

verve_rat 5y ago
Seems like you could probably do some effective and efficient research using games. I always have to force myself to use the one shot super weapon, or even a few grenades, in order to not end the game without ever using them. Video games seem like the perfect arena in which to do and apply this research.
- samplatt 5y ago
  In a lifetime of regret and missed opportunities, this is one area at least where I've learned my lesson. I can now go through a whole game and use all the "special" stuff that I'm given, and usually even at the appropriate times! Kinda proud. It sounds silly but it took a lot of letting go.
  - didsomeonesay 5y ago
    It's not silly, you found a dojo for practicing "letting go"! Hope your can transfer this to life. Will try your method if i ever find the appropriate time to play the "special" games on the steam backlog...
- bentcorner 5y ago
  RPG players do this all the time - they save those health and mana potions for a time they really need it, and invariably never do. Games that streamline these mechanics by making recovery items more fungible lose a little personality but are probably easier to balance.

contravariant 5y ago

Is it just me does this seem like some flimsy research? I mean asking people to choose between two types of paper and observing that people who choose type A are more likely to choose type A the next time is hardly conclusive evidence of anything. It'd be weirder if it didn't happen. And if you ask people for reasons why they shouldn't open a bottle of wine just yet they're obviously going to suggest that they're waiting for a better occasion. For something that doesn't even seem like much of a problem, or at least hasn't been established to be a problem by anything other than the author's gut feeling, this all doesn't seem to amount to much more than just affirming people's preconceptions.

derefr 5y ago
> For something that doesn't even seem like much of a problem Presumably the author’s occupation, “marketing science”, is interested in getting people to use things (and use them up) so that they’ll need to buy more of them, so that they a marketer can then sell them those things.
memco 5y ago
Quite! The article doesn't start off on a great note: > Fast forward to today. I have never worn my Target blouse. What had started out as ordinary now holds a special place in my closet, and no occasion feels quite worthy of my wearing it. > What happened here? Why do people own so many unused possessions, treating them as though they are too special to use? One person bought a blouse they don't wear and then extrapolate that people own so many unused possessions? Where is the data that shows how many people have unused possessions, how much of their possessions are unused and how many of those are unused due to their specialness? The article does build a decent case that the idea that once something is assigned a special status that status becomes amplified in an interesting way that should be investigated, but isn't itself a good investigation of that effect.

MarkusWandel 5y ago

One way out of this is if the special item somehow becomes worthless over time. A food item that spoils, clothing that goes so hopelessly out of style that you can never wear it, gadgets that are no longer compatible with anything. Another is if you can convince yourself that it'll be just as special to some other person, then pass it on to them. But in that case, don't ask about it later, in case you were wrong.

iJohnDoe 5y ago
This is the solution. It’s important for people to realize this. Once people realize that those special items are going to waste, then hopefully a positive change can happen, and those items can be used instead of collecting dust and going to waste.

scrooched_moose 5y ago

I've probably given away 15-20 endgrain cutting boards over the last few Christmases to various family and friends - nothing fancy, just random pattern to use up scrap from other projects instead of tossing it in the fire pit. I know of at least 4 that have never been used for anything but serving trays because they're "special". I find it hilarious every time - they're made to be used and abused. I've told every one of them "if you actually manage to use it enough to damage it, I'll just make you another one", but they still sit there in pristine condition.

matkoniecz 5y ago
I guess that they already have cutting boards (and this one is not superior in this role), but their trays were uglier than this one. So keeping it in "pretty tray" role makes sense.
soylentnewsorg 5y ago
you gave people who know you your time, your thoughtfulness, and your acquired and honed skill. those are not cutting boards - they are photographs of a moment. anywise, the way to solve your issue is to give them a second cutting board - then the first one becomes a non-scarce commodity and both will likely get used.
- nathannecro 5y ago
  I like this perspective. I think it applies well to many things we collect. I've been collecting fountain pens for more than a decade now and I've observed that new collectors end up buying their "trophy" pen only to have it remain uninked and kept in a drawer someplace. It's only a few more years later, when another "trophy" is inevitably collected, that both pens see use.
  - stevekemp 5y ago
    Similar story with watch-collectors - some people buy their grail, then leave it in a safe. There's a big mismatch between people who have "pristine" watches, and those that have seen life and suffered the inevitable scratches, dents, and damage.

Groxx 5y ago

>Interestingly, participants who had the initial opportunity to use the notebook, but hadn't, were significantly less likely to use the notebook later in the session, versus those who hadn't had the option. And this finding was not limited just to notebooks. We saw the same pattern in other scenario-based experiments using bottles of wine and TV episodes. eeeehhhhhhhh.... I dunno. "People who don't do a thing once are less likely to do it the next time" seems like it would explain this as well or better, and it's a simpler explanation. And I don't buy that the imaginary-wine followup question implies "more special" either. By telling them that they did not open it immediately, they've set up that initial "did not use" - there are many reasons to not-use something, many of which work in future unspecified scenarios as well. That doesn't imply it is growing less likely to be used with each event, maintenance is sufficient. --- I absolutely agree that some things for some people fall into this kind of spiral. They also get out of it sometimes - I've personally had or seen quite a few "argh, why do we even have this?! [use it or lose it]" sequences. But I think more fall into knickknack-like territory - they were never going to be used, adding more time doesn't change that. It's closer to an emotional attachment to something, and not wanting to lose it. There's no ideal future where it will be used.

ModernMech 5y ago

My grandmother had an oriental rug that no one was allowed to step on. For 40 years she tried to keep this rug pristine because she was going to sell it one day. Anytime any of us grandchildren or even the eventual great grandchildren stepped on it, they would get a harsh scolding. She died never having sold that rug, but after her death there was a lot of fighting over who would get the thing. It tore our family apart, the arguing over it. Finally the victor took it to an auction house to get it appraised and sold. It was worthless. They put it up for auction and no one wanted it. Eventually the auction house asked us if we wanted them to dispose of it for a fee. I think about this a lot when I consider letting go of material possessions. That rug has become sort of a symbol to me, of the encumbering nature of our possessions. Or maybe it was just a conduit for my grandmother’s undiagnosed mental health issues. Either way I try to live with fewer things in my life these days.

im3w1l 5y ago
Specialness fascinates me. And the pointless rituals that goes along with it. They have a strong effect on us, which in some sense makes them not pointless. Like placebo, inert in itself, but effective because we make it so. It's a good story, and if not for the arguments over who would get it, I could see it having been a nice anchor to remember eccentric old grandma.
weq 5y ago
Watching shows like pawn stars, or american pickers, or car sos, you see many ways that these types of though processes can play out. So many people goto the grave never getting around to there hopes and dreams. To the day they die. Often the familys of these people have no idea what todo with these posessions, and its interesting how often their the most treasured item ends up being the least appreciated asset of there estate.

bluedino 5y ago

I have some external hard drives, and some internal SSD's, as well as some USB thumbdrives, brand new in the package. Haven't found anything to store on them yet. I keep re-using old ones. Eventually I'll find one a few years later in some tiny (relative to current sizes) and laugh at how I never used it and originally paid $250 for it.

nextaccountic 5y ago
Just use them for backups!

aimor 5y ago

At some point I had a moment of realization that most things are meant to be used. That is, those fancy decorative soaps smell better on your hands than on the shelf, chocolates taste better in your mouth than in the box, if someone gives you a gift they want to enjoy it. Unsurprisingly I agree with the article's advice: use the things you have as soon as it's appropriate to use them. Light candles for dinner, write in the margins of your books, eat off china with silverware. This makes ordinary moments more enjoyable and more special.

KozmoNau7 5y ago
Exactly, things have a purpose and more often than not, that purpose is to be used up, possibly repaired and then used again, until it finally wears out or breaks completely. I tend to baby new things until the feeling of novelty wear off, then I just use them. I don't abuse them, but I stop trying to avoid normal wear and tear. Repairing things is also something I find relaxing and interesting. As a consequence, I tend to stick to things that are durable and can be repaired, designs and materials that have stood the test of time, and I keep them for as long as I can. A well-worn patina on an obviously beloved object is hard to fake.

hlesesne 5y ago

I can’t think of a single thing I own that I feel this way about. Yet, I feel like I spend and spend on the things that don’t actually inspire me. Is there an inverse relationship between good stewardship/financial maturity and the number of lines or code I commit? Feels like it.

criddell 5y ago
I have things that are special to me, but nothing that is too special to never be used. In the past I think I've had similar feelings to what you describe: I buy a lot of stuff, but it's just stuff. These days if I'm going to buy something, I get what I think is the best one and if I can't afford that, I wait until I can. I probably over spend on some stuff, but the wait also leads to me buying fewer things. I'm still not sentimental about physical things though. I have no qualms about giving away or selling things that were given to me as gifts or bequeathments.

bitwize 5y ago

I'm reminded of that one special potion that sits and sits and sits in your inventory, unused, because once it's used it will be gone and where will you find another one? Megalixirs (restore all HP and MP to all party members) and Hero Drinks (the same, plus temporary invincibility to all) are likely candidates in Final Fantasy games, but in Final Fantasy XII Ethers (restore some MP to one character) are incredibly rare and MP recharges slowly over time anyways so why use them? You might need them later...

jrootabega 5y ago

I have noticed the opposite phenomenon: at some point I lose my reverence for new things and start treating them poorly. Usually electronics like a new phone, new laptop, new headset. When they're new, I feel their value in their weight and physical characteristics. Once I get used to that, they start feeling commonplace and I treat them carelessly, and don't even really feel bad about it.

JoeAltmaier 5y ago

I buy last-year's special thing, and use it up. Phones, cars, bicycles, whatever. It was good enough last year, so it must be pretty good. And I treat it like a tool. Saves a lot of money too. I long ago categorized that 'too good to use' impulse as a childish one. As a kid I wouldn't want to use up a new box of crayons or whatever, and would end up never using them much at all. Later I recognized this as a feeling that I wasn't good enough for nice things. I consciously shed that attitude, and taught my children to be confident enough to open everything and use it up. Life is too short.

ip26 5y ago
In my case I later realized it was due to being not very well-off with multiple siblings. Once I used up that box of crayons, that very well may have been my last set of crayons. Of course, in reality crayons that you can't use are not that much better than crayons you don't have.

jrootabega 5y ago

I remember as a kid my parents brought me a nice rubber ducky. I was very upset when they told me it was marzipan and I was supposed to eat it, after which it would no longer exist. It may have also been a marshmallow peep.