5 ms·

EJ: How I Feel today

42 points by palebluedot 15y ago

pseudonym 15y ago
Hopefully this will be an endcap to the public side of this, at least. Here's hoping she can get what reimbursement she's entitled to and get back to her life.
shawnee_ 15y ago
ESFP
daimyoyo 15y ago
This will become a textbook example of how(and how not) to handle disasters in the Web 2.0 world. As an aside, I'm glad AirBnB is finally doing the right thing.
OpenAmazing 15y ago
I hope you will come back here in search of answers to the many questions that loom large. That's an interesting thing to say, especially after recounting the emotional impact the internet trolls have had on her. It seems she may be struggling with how best to react to her new internet fame.
Cushman 15y ago
Ouch. They mishandled this badly. I think it's clear by now that EJ could have become an extraordinary spokeswoman for the Airbnb Guarantee; instead, all they get is a single "gratified".
juliano_q 15y ago
Well, she obviously had a trauma and have to recover now, and it will take some time. I hope that they catch the criminals, EJ recovers well and Airbnb learn with their mistakes. That said, I think we can move on from this history. It is a sad history, but much worst and much better stuff happends every day. It will be the best for us and for her if we just move on.
btucker 15y ago
Here are my take-aways from this whole fiasco: 1) If you're in a business where your customers' lives could be seriously impacted 24/7, you must be reachable 24/7. 2) When something goes horribly wrong and far outside any predetermined policy, follow in the footsteps of Derek Sivers, Tony Hsieh, Gary Vaynerchuk, and the thousands of business owners that have come before them and just do right by the customer. Don't worry about setting precedent, don't worry about losing money (within reason), just do whatever you can to show that you truly care. Make sure all your employees know this & give them the freedom to make decisions on their own to help the customer. 3) Don't create a situation where you're "clarifying" what your customer has said publicly and calling into question their feelings. 4) When you screw up (and you will), own up to it in a public way as quickly as possible. Make a big deal about it. Your future customers will appreciate the candor and seeing your commitment to getting things right.
mc32 15y ago
Here's how I feel about the events: ABNB reacted overly cautiously to the detriment of their customers and also themselves. They were utterly unprepared and made many missteps and outright blunders --naive, really. EJ described the harrowing experience. There was sympathy, and there was some disbelief, as well (unfortunately, there appeared to have been some strong-arming too). ABNB, eventually, after much public outrage and prodding, finally, after severe fall-out, came correct. There was reticence, it appears. EJ is now pinning the reaction to her statements, at least tangentially, on ABNB. She had me till that. And still has me on board for the stuff before that. However, one cannot publish something, at large, i.e. broadcast it, and think everyone is going to be sympathetic to you. It's naive. The only people one can fault are the respondents. I'm not saying she brought that onto herself. No. However, it's just part of the deal. It's like buying meat at the butcher's and not expecting it means there's a cow somewhere that will get slaughtered. It's part and parcel. The reaction to her posting has nothing to do with ABNB, directly. It cannot be pinned on the ABNB donkey. The reaction comes across as appealing to emotion. I think that horse has been beaten.
- scott_s 15y ago
  Consider that EJ is like most people who write anything online, including you and I on this site. We may know that everything we say is, in theory, open to the whole world, but in practice, no one cares. I think she wrote her blog post in that mindset. It's similar to a mindset that, say, you have when writing a comment on HN. Now consider what would happen when seemingly the entirety of the internet is analyzing what you said. It's easy to say she should have known that her blog is a broadcast medium, but really, it's not most of the time. Most of the time, very few people probably read it. Most forum posts and blog entries get lost amid the noise. I think it's unrealistic to assume that everyone who writes things on the internet that normally gets lost among the noise should be emotionally prepared to be temporarily not lost among the noise.
  - mc32 15y ago
    I'm sympathetic. It's a very reasonable and persuasive argument. Unfortunately, it's one of those things one cannot control -short of censorship. The same thing happens with people's email transcripts. The same happens with politicians and open mics. Most of the time ill-conceved/or personal emails or rants or candid opinions to an open mic are not picked up and broadcast --sometimes, depending on context, opportunity and misfortune, they are -to lots of regret, embarrassment and perhaps, lawful correction. Occasionally, opportunity. Basically, to me, they seem inextricable. I cannot/am not able to see a way to separate them in an unmoderated open forum. My main point wasn't that she should have realized it's a broadcast medium. Rather, realize the medium is subject, by its public nature, to a spectrum of reactions. Some of those can be reactionary and unwelcome. It's part of discourse.
stevenp 15y ago
I'd be curious to know whether the Airbnb guys were honest with pg about what was really going on, since pg commented a few days ago on HN: "I've talked to the Airbnb guys and they are already doing everything they could be doing to help this woman." The tone of some of the comments made by public people (like pg) seemed to imply that EJ was lying, without saying it directly. Assuming that Airbnb's mea culpa about being "paralyzed" is true, I think EJ deserves an apology from some of these people that have characterized her as being less than honest, based on their friendships/personal connections with the Airbnb team. I like Airbnb (I'm staying in one of their rentals right now!) and I hope that in the end this whole situation makes them more successful.
- pbreit 15y ago
  Everyone bends a little in their own direction but I didn't see anything worthy of the "liar" designation.
Mafana0 15y ago
I hate to be that guy, but... Why should we have every single blog post by EJ on top stories here on HN? Why is "how she feels today" so important and still relevant? She caused all the drama and blamed Airbnb for something she is more responsible about than Airbnb. Airbnb did the right thing after all, some think that it's late, I don't. I'm just pissed about the attention that we give to her words. I won't be surprised if she authors a book to talk about how "Airbnb should have responded much more quickly to my urgent pleas for help, that they should have communicated with more sensitivity, and that they should have taken decisive action to help me feel safe during what has been a desperate time.". Come on, stop blaming them, they didn't make your "integrity being called into question", and your "character publicly trashed". You did.
- kyro 15y ago
  Yeah, she's received more than her fair share of sympathy.
- hk43 15y ago
  I already have -7 points and I am sure that this will also get downvoted but: AirBnB did not warn users - even so this was NOT the first case of a trashed home. THEY did know better, yet they never warned their users that this could happen. You might call this common sense, but their website paints the "we are all happy people" image, so they were actively trying to erode this common sense. Yes, they are partly to blame for this.
- djcapelis 15y ago
  It's on HN right now because it's an amazingly good and open discussion about how someone who was involved in a PR nightmare feels after it moves from being a story to being something in the past. If you read carefully, there are important lessons in PR and how to do good customer service embedded all around this story. There are lessons on crisis management, and yes, there are lessons on irrational human behavior and responses, especially in terms of how media attention, time and the reactions of others changes people's perspectives. I've found HN's comment section to be equally full of lessons on irrationality. From the person who is angry that EJ can't be satisfied to the person whose heart was still captured by her original story and unsatisfied by the outcome. These are how your customers respond when you do something wrong and are disappointed in you. For a site that focuses on startups, these lessons are worth seeing.
throwaway_away 15y ago
Am I the only one that feels EJ is being a bit dramatic about the situation? I made this throwaway in case I am really just crass and insensitive... but time and time again I see examples of what I call the new "American Dream" - which is to sue someone or some organisation for hurt, pain, and suffering. Airbnb fucked up. I see that. EJ had a really shitty experience, and I would not want meth addicts to ransack my house and steal my identity. But what would make her happy? What does Airbnb need to do now? I have a feeling it involves millions of dollars... because millions of dollars in compensation seems to be the cure for this kind of emotional damage.
- scott_s 15y ago
  I think it's unfair to blame her for a lawsuit you have made-up. As for being dramatic, people who are coping with PTSD probably look "a bit dramatic" to the outside world.
  - kyro 15y ago
    You don't know if she's coping with PTSD. You and a few others have been throwing that around. Learn your psychology and psychiatry first before you start making your diagnoses.
    - scott_s 15y ago
      You're right, I don't know because she has not been diagnosed, nor am I a psychiatrist. But considering her descriptions of what the past several weeks have been like, and the words she has used to describe the events, it sounds to me more likely than not. My point with bringing this up is before thinking that she is overreacting, consider that she might be suffering from PTSD.
- deleted 15y ago
  [deleted]
startupcomment 15y ago
It was inevitable that something of this nature was bound to occur eventually. The folks at AirBNB should have had better policies and procedures in place to help to avert and react to such situations.

42 points by palebluedot 15y ago

Hopefully this will be an endcap to the public side of this, at least. Here's hoping she can get what reimbursement she's entitled to and get back to her life.

shawnee_ 15y ago

ESFP

daimyoyo 15y ago

This will become a textbook example of how(and how not) to handle disasters in the Web 2.0 world. As an aside, I'm glad AirBnB is finally doing the right thing.

OpenAmazing 15y ago

I hope you will come back here in search of answers to the many questions that loom large. That's an interesting thing to say, especially after recounting the emotional impact the internet trolls have had on her. It seems she may be struggling with how best to react to her new internet fame.

Cushman 15y ago

Ouch. They mishandled this badly. I think it's clear by now that EJ could have become an extraordinary spokeswoman for the Airbnb Guarantee; instead, all they get is a single "gratified".

juliano_q 15y ago

Well, she obviously had a trauma and have to recover now, and it will take some time. I hope that they catch the criminals, EJ recovers well and Airbnb learn with their mistakes. That said, I think we can move on from this history. It is a sad history, but much worst and much better stuff happends every day. It will be the best for us and for her if we just move on.

btucker 15y ago

Here are my take-aways from this whole fiasco: 1) If you're in a business where your customers' lives could be seriously impacted 24/7, you must be reachable 24/7. 2) When something goes horribly wrong and far outside any predetermined policy, follow in the footsteps of Derek Sivers, Tony Hsieh, Gary Vaynerchuk, and the thousands of business owners that have come before them and just do right by the customer. Don't worry about setting precedent, don't worry about losing money (within reason), just do whatever you can to show that you truly care. Make sure all your employees know this & give them the freedom to make decisions on their own to help the customer. 3) Don't create a situation where you're "clarifying" what your customer has said publicly and calling into question their feelings. 4) When you screw up (and you will), own up to it in a public way as quickly as possible. Make a big deal about it. Your future customers will appreciate the candor and seeing your commitment to getting things right.

mc32 15y ago

Here's how I feel about the events: ABNB reacted overly cautiously to the detriment of their customers and also themselves. They were utterly unprepared and made many missteps and outright blunders --naive, really. EJ described the harrowing experience. There was sympathy, and there was some disbelief, as well (unfortunately, there appeared to have been some strong-arming too). ABNB, eventually, after much public outrage and prodding, finally, after severe fall-out, came correct. There was reticence, it appears. EJ is now pinning the reaction to her statements, at least tangentially, on ABNB. She had me till that. And still has me on board for the stuff before that. However, one cannot publish something, at large, i.e. broadcast it, and think everyone is going to be sympathetic to you. It's naive. The only people one can fault are the respondents. I'm not saying she brought that onto herself. No. However, it's just part of the deal. It's like buying meat at the butcher's and not expecting it means there's a cow somewhere that will get slaughtered. It's part and parcel. The reaction to her posting has nothing to do with ABNB, directly. It cannot be pinned on the ABNB donkey. The reaction comes across as appealing to emotion. I think that horse has been beaten.

scott_s 15y ago
Consider that EJ is like most people who write anything online, including you and I on this site. We may know that everything we say is, in theory, open to the whole world, but in practice, no one cares. I think she wrote her blog post in that mindset. It's similar to a mindset that, say, you have when writing a comment on HN. Now consider what would happen when seemingly the entirety of the internet is analyzing what you said. It's easy to say she should have known that her blog is a broadcast medium, but really, it's not most of the time. Most of the time, very few people probably read it. Most forum posts and blog entries get lost amid the noise. I think it's unrealistic to assume that everyone who writes things on the internet that normally gets lost among the noise should be emotionally prepared to be temporarily not lost among the noise.
- mc32 15y ago
  I'm sympathetic. It's a very reasonable and persuasive argument. Unfortunately, it's one of those things one cannot control -short of censorship. The same thing happens with people's email transcripts. The same happens with politicians and open mics. Most of the time ill-conceved/or personal emails or rants or candid opinions to an open mic are not picked up and broadcast --sometimes, depending on context, opportunity and misfortune, they are -to lots of regret, embarrassment and perhaps, lawful correction. Occasionally, opportunity. Basically, to me, they seem inextricable. I cannot/am not able to see a way to separate them in an unmoderated open forum. My main point wasn't that she should have realized it's a broadcast medium. Rather, realize the medium is subject, by its public nature, to a spectrum of reactions. Some of those can be reactionary and unwelcome. It's part of discourse.

stevenp 15y ago

I'd be curious to know whether the Airbnb guys were honest with pg about what was really going on, since pg commented a few days ago on HN: "I've talked to the Airbnb guys and they are already doing everything they could be doing to help this woman." The tone of some of the comments made by public people (like pg) seemed to imply that EJ was lying, without saying it directly. Assuming that Airbnb's mea culpa about being "paralyzed" is true, I think EJ deserves an apology from some of these people that have characterized her as being less than honest, based on their friendships/personal connections with the Airbnb team. I like Airbnb (I'm staying in one of their rentals right now!) and I hope that in the end this whole situation makes them more successful.

pbreit 15y ago
Everyone bends a little in their own direction but I didn't see anything worthy of the "liar" designation.

Mafana0 15y ago

I hate to be that guy, but... Why should we have every single blog post by EJ on top stories here on HN? Why is "how she feels today" so important and still relevant? She caused all the drama and blamed Airbnb for something she is more responsible about than Airbnb. Airbnb did the right thing after all, some think that it's late, I don't. I'm just pissed about the attention that we give to her words. I won't be surprised if she authors a book to talk about how "Airbnb should have responded much more quickly to my urgent pleas for help, that they should have communicated with more sensitivity, and that they should have taken decisive action to help me feel safe during what has been a desperate time.". Come on, stop blaming them, they didn't make your "integrity being called into question", and your "character publicly trashed". You did.

kyro 15y ago
Yeah, she's received more than her fair share of sympathy.
hk43 15y ago
I already have -7 points and I am sure that this will also get downvoted but: AirBnB did not warn users - even so this was NOT the first case of a trashed home. THEY did know better, yet they never warned their users that this could happen. You might call this common sense, but their website paints the "we are all happy people" image, so they were actively trying to erode this common sense. Yes, they are partly to blame for this.
djcapelis 15y ago
It's on HN right now because it's an amazingly good and open discussion about how someone who was involved in a PR nightmare feels after it moves from being a story to being something in the past. If you read carefully, there are important lessons in PR and how to do good customer service embedded all around this story. There are lessons on crisis management, and yes, there are lessons on irrational human behavior and responses, especially in terms of how media attention, time and the reactions of others changes people's perspectives. I've found HN's comment section to be equally full of lessons on irrationality. From the person who is angry that EJ can't be satisfied to the person whose heart was still captured by her original story and unsatisfied by the outcome. These are how your customers respond when you do something wrong and are disappointed in you. For a site that focuses on startups, these lessons are worth seeing.

throwaway_away 15y ago

Am I the only one that feels EJ is being a bit dramatic about the situation? I made this throwaway in case I am really just crass and insensitive... but time and time again I see examples of what I call the new "American Dream" - which is to sue someone or some organisation for hurt, pain, and suffering. Airbnb fucked up. I see that. EJ had a really shitty experience, and I would not want meth addicts to ransack my house and steal my identity. But what would make her happy? What does Airbnb need to do now? I have a feeling it involves millions of dollars... because millions of dollars in compensation seems to be the cure for this kind of emotional damage.

scott_s 15y ago
I think it's unfair to blame her for a lawsuit you have made-up. As for being dramatic, people who are coping with PTSD probably look "a bit dramatic" to the outside world.
- kyro 15y ago
  You don't know if she's coping with PTSD. You and a few others have been throwing that around. Learn your psychology and psychiatry first before you start making your diagnoses.
  - scott_s 15y ago
    You're right, I don't know because she has not been diagnosed, nor am I a psychiatrist. But considering her descriptions of what the past several weeks have been like, and the words she has used to describe the events, it sounds to me more likely than not. My point with bringing this up is before thinking that she is overreacting, consider that she might be suffering from PTSD.
deleted 15y ago
[deleted]

startupcomment 15y ago

It was inevitable that something of this nature was bound to occur eventually. The folks at AirBNB should have had better policies and procedures in place to help to avert and react to such situations.