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After years of living for the moment and YOLOing, author felt bad because she was in her 30s and didnt have wealth, then her parents gave her a large lump sum o

After years of living for the moment and YOLOing, author felt bad because she was in her 30s and didnt have wealth, then her parents gave her a large lump sum of money and she was able to apply things she learned from financial management books. The end.

rhexs 5y ago
I can’t wait until I can move into a “retired millionaire’s” house at below market rent when I run into tough times. What an inspiring article.
- throwaway0a5e 5y ago
  Read between the lines there. She describes him the way people describe their significant others and not the way people generally describe mentors and/or business partners. People don't generally know their landlords well enough to get an understanding of the details of their business and landlords don't tend to rent stuff out at highly discounted rates without very specific business reasons or emotional attachment.
  - exporectomy 5y ago
    Yep. Economics work differently for women because of the asymmetry in the market for sex. Nothing wrong with that, but it's a bit of a taboo.
mcavoybn 5y ago
Yeah I was waiting for the point in this article where it became about "outdoorsy types" and not the author but it never happened. I'd be embarrassed too, mismanaging money and relying on my parents support at 34 years old. I guess the author was just so embarrassed that she published this article about it. Great job with the antagonizing, clickbait title though. I'm guessing "My Tone-deaf Autobiography about How Irresponsible I am" was thrown out.
- exporectomy 5y ago
  Why are people critical of being supported by your parents in your 30's? Because that's not "normal" or "proper" or unfair on those who don't have that support? Or for a real reason that's bad according to some fundamental moral standard? We're all supported by our parents to some extent. Why is it so wrong for late-support outliers to exist? That sounds like being a teenager when everyone is trying to make it look like they're independent but really their mum still does their washing and cooks their dinner because it's shameful to be supported by your parents. In my country, due to high house prices, adult professionals often buy their first house with money from their parents because they can't otherwise afford it. It's call "The bank of mum and dad". Is that irresponsible? Is it OK only after it's become common but was wrong for the first few people who did it?
  - corndoge 5y ago
    It's more that it's just ridiculous to generalize this clearly fortunate situation to "outdoorsy types" instead of "the author"
  - bradlys 5y ago
    At least in the US, it’s seen as not being able to be individualistic and make it on your own. There’s a very high value to being able to not be reliant on anyone - literally anyone or anything. Government handouts to family support to even the help of friends - there’s a strong desire to be able to do everything by yourself. If your parents helped you get your house, it’s not only a sign of likely coming from a privileged background (not many households in the US can just give their kids a downpayment on a house…) but it’s also a sign that you couldn’t even do what others have managed on their own. As many people do it without the bank of mom and dad and do it without having come from a background of privilege - it doesn’t look good. Some will rationalize it and talk about keeping money in the family or what not - but most Americans see it from a mile away as somewhat shameful or regrettable. Keeping money in the family is also somewhat shameful in itself as it is something typically very privileged people do and it is seen as keeping the money out of the rest of us. (Creating royal families and a class of nobility essentially)
m0llusk 5y ago
Actually, she put all of her nest eggs into an inflated asset which sounds like she still hasn't really learned the most important lessons.
notesinthefield 5y ago
The older the company I mix with, the more I realize how common it is for parents to give their kids a huge leg up financially. I am one of the only people in my friend group to not have been given the equivalent of a large home down payment by the time they were thirty.
- deleted 5y ago
  [deleted]
- xwolfi 5y ago
  Huh you have nice friends. My parents a rich and the only thing they gave me directly was a rent payment on a flat I was leaving when I moved abroad . They paid the $1000 rent for 6 months in case it didnt pan out and needee to crash back. That was amazingly nice but a house downpayment, I d feel like cheating at life.
  - war1025 5y ago
    My understanding is that it's pretty common on the US coasts (i.e. the major metros where housing is super unaffordable). I imagine it's a self feeding cycle. Young adults can't purchase homes, so their parents cosign and give a big down payment. Then sellers are able to ask more because wealthy parents are backing the sale, which just makes housing even more unaffordable.
  - IkmoIkmo 5y ago
    Even so, the safety net can be useful. I have a friend who knows his parents have >1m available, and he knows that given their spending patterns, the returns on investments and actuarial tables, it's likely a $2m windfall will come his way within the next 20 years. That allows a wildly different lifestyle. He can spend 100% of what he earns, and still - retire early - buy a large home - send his kids to uni - enjoy quality of life of the top 15% Not having to buy a home, invest in stocks, reserve money for retirement, savings etc, is a big deal. Meanwhile other friends who have no such parents are more stuck in the rat race and will likely work till an old age retirement, not have a big home, will struggle with kids' education blablabla. The other thing is that if he fucks up, his parents will help him out. This is one of the reasons I think that he started his own business and continued through years of no-income, whereas others had no such luxury to fail for a few years. e.g. there's plenty of people who, if they had not climbed the corporate ladder the past few years, would permanently be locked out of the housing market. He has no such problem, as if shit really hits the fan there's always a safety net. Your parents might be reserved, but unless they're quite unique, they'll definitely step in if you really fall. Lastly, don't think it applies to you but I find as kids get older and the 'house' discussion comes up, suddenly rich parents step-in in ways they wouldn't have before (e.g. to fund a fun lifestyle). I've seen this housing-purchase support so often and it can't be overstated how much of a leg up this can be. And even if no support is given, inheritance of rich parents typically covers the mortgage and then some mid-life. Don't mean to make it too personal and dump a lot of 'you're actually privileged' on you, I don't know you so I really can't say, every family is different. But on a more general note, having rich parents is definitely useful even if there's not been much financial help so far.
princeb 5y ago
> was able to apply things she learned from financial management books some people learn this early (the author's friend who grew up poor), and some people learn this late (the author), and some people never get a chance to learn this lesson, ever (not mentioned, the resort bums who reach 40 years old full of sports injuries, zero savings with no future and no more ability to ski). in any case, the author seems self-aware enough to know that there will be comments on the internet like yours. she expresses remorse for having gone through this path on crutches. at least she has a story to share. someone who "retired" early from a corporate finance job with a couple of million in investments (whose life the author was only a few decisions away from), goes out and finally lives his dream never having lost anything is about as uninteresting as a trust fund kid exploring the world.

rhexs 5y ago

I can’t wait until I can move into a “retired millionaire’s” house at below market rent when I run into tough times. What an inspiring article.

throwaway0a5e 5y ago
Read between the lines there. She describes him the way people describe their significant others and not the way people generally describe mentors and/or business partners. People don't generally know their landlords well enough to get an understanding of the details of their business and landlords don't tend to rent stuff out at highly discounted rates without very specific business reasons or emotional attachment.
- exporectomy 5y ago
  Yep. Economics work differently for women because of the asymmetry in the market for sex. Nothing wrong with that, but it's a bit of a taboo.

mcavoybn 5y ago

Yeah I was waiting for the point in this article where it became about "outdoorsy types" and not the author but it never happened. I'd be embarrassed too, mismanaging money and relying on my parents support at 34 years old. I guess the author was just so embarrassed that she published this article about it. Great job with the antagonizing, clickbait title though. I'm guessing "My Tone-deaf Autobiography about How Irresponsible I am" was thrown out.

exporectomy 5y ago
Why are people critical of being supported by your parents in your 30's? Because that's not "normal" or "proper" or unfair on those who don't have that support? Or for a real reason that's bad according to some fundamental moral standard? We're all supported by our parents to some extent. Why is it so wrong for late-support outliers to exist? That sounds like being a teenager when everyone is trying to make it look like they're independent but really their mum still does their washing and cooks their dinner because it's shameful to be supported by your parents. In my country, due to high house prices, adult professionals often buy their first house with money from their parents because they can't otherwise afford it. It's call "The bank of mum and dad". Is that irresponsible? Is it OK only after it's become common but was wrong for the first few people who did it?
- corndoge 5y ago
  It's more that it's just ridiculous to generalize this clearly fortunate situation to "outdoorsy types" instead of "the author"
- bradlys 5y ago
  At least in the US, it’s seen as not being able to be individualistic and make it on your own. There’s a very high value to being able to not be reliant on anyone - literally anyone or anything. Government handouts to family support to even the help of friends - there’s a strong desire to be able to do everything by yourself. If your parents helped you get your house, it’s not only a sign of likely coming from a privileged background (not many households in the US can just give their kids a downpayment on a house…) but it’s also a sign that you couldn’t even do what others have managed on their own. As many people do it without the bank of mom and dad and do it without having come from a background of privilege - it doesn’t look good. Some will rationalize it and talk about keeping money in the family or what not - but most Americans see it from a mile away as somewhat shameful or regrettable. Keeping money in the family is also somewhat shameful in itself as it is something typically very privileged people do and it is seen as keeping the money out of the rest of us. (Creating royal families and a class of nobility essentially)

m0llusk 5y ago

Actually, she put all of her nest eggs into an inflated asset which sounds like she still hasn't really learned the most important lessons.

notesinthefield 5y ago

The older the company I mix with, the more I realize how common it is for parents to give their kids a huge leg up financially. I am one of the only people in my friend group to not have been given the equivalent of a large home down payment by the time they were thirty.

deleted 5y ago
[deleted]
xwolfi 5y ago
Huh you have nice friends. My parents a rich and the only thing they gave me directly was a rent payment on a flat I was leaving when I moved abroad . They paid the $1000 rent for 6 months in case it didnt pan out and needee to crash back. That was amazingly nice but a house downpayment, I d feel like cheating at life.
- war1025 5y ago
  My understanding is that it's pretty common on the US coasts (i.e. the major metros where housing is super unaffordable). I imagine it's a self feeding cycle. Young adults can't purchase homes, so their parents cosign and give a big down payment. Then sellers are able to ask more because wealthy parents are backing the sale, which just makes housing even more unaffordable.
- IkmoIkmo 5y ago
  Even so, the safety net can be useful. I have a friend who knows his parents have >1m available, and he knows that given their spending patterns, the returns on investments and actuarial tables, it's likely a $2m windfall will come his way within the next 20 years. That allows a wildly different lifestyle. He can spend 100% of what he earns, and still - retire early - buy a large home - send his kids to uni - enjoy quality of life of the top 15% Not having to buy a home, invest in stocks, reserve money for retirement, savings etc, is a big deal. Meanwhile other friends who have no such parents are more stuck in the rat race and will likely work till an old age retirement, not have a big home, will struggle with kids' education blablabla. The other thing is that if he fucks up, his parents will help him out. This is one of the reasons I think that he started his own business and continued through years of no-income, whereas others had no such luxury to fail for a few years. e.g. there's plenty of people who, if they had not climbed the corporate ladder the past few years, would permanently be locked out of the housing market. He has no such problem, as if shit really hits the fan there's always a safety net. Your parents might be reserved, but unless they're quite unique, they'll definitely step in if you really fall. Lastly, don't think it applies to you but I find as kids get older and the 'house' discussion comes up, suddenly rich parents step-in in ways they wouldn't have before (e.g. to fund a fun lifestyle). I've seen this housing-purchase support so often and it can't be overstated how much of a leg up this can be. And even if no support is given, inheritance of rich parents typically covers the mortgage and then some mid-life. Don't mean to make it too personal and dump a lot of 'you're actually privileged' on you, I don't know you so I really can't say, every family is different. But on a more general note, having rich parents is definitely useful even if there's not been much financial help so far.

princeb 5y ago

> was able to apply things she learned from financial management books some people learn this early (the author's friend who grew up poor), and some people learn this late (the author), and some people never get a chance to learn this lesson, ever (not mentioned, the resort bums who reach 40 years old full of sports injuries, zero savings with no future and no more ability to ski). in any case, the author seems self-aware enough to know that there will be comments on the internet like yours. she expresses remorse for having gone through this path on crutches. at least she has a story to share. someone who "retired" early from a corporate finance job with a couple of million in investments (whose life the author was only a few decisions away from), goes out and finally lives his dream never having lost anything is about as uninteresting as a trust fund kid exploring the world.