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What kinks do you think are unhealthy? I’d wager that truly unhealthy kinks are uncommon.

syops 5y ago
Virtually all sex acts can be done in a healthy way provided both parties are truly into it. Porn has created expectations in men as to what women normally want and as a result a lot of women do sex acts that they don't truly like. Porn has distorted the view of what is 'normal' and the expectations of what a woman should consent to.
- haswell 5y ago
  The parent comment asks for specifics, but you go back to generalizing porn in response. > Porn has distorted the view of what is ‘normal’ Surely you mean some porn, but you have not clarified which types. What do you say to plain, “vanilla” porn that pushes no boundaries? As with so many things, this is not a black or white issue, and statements like your final sentence do nothing to advance a nuanced conversation about the subject.
  - syops 5y ago
    It's easy to find research on the topic. The research supports my view.
    - haswell 5y ago
      So share the research that supports your view… As the person making claims without evidence, the onus is on you at this point. You’re not going to change minds if you’re not willing to share where you’re coming from.
      - syops 5y ago
        A person sufficiently interested in exploring whether or not I'm right can easily use a search engine and find the research. If a person can't be bothered to do that on their own then I think nothing I post will change their mind. An intellectually curious person will delve into the issue once they see dissenting opinions being expressed.
        haswell 5y ago
        Someone else in the thread was kind enough to share what they felt are good sources, so I’ll take a look at those. I can only conclude that you have nothing to back your position, and you are postulating based on 2nd hand information. Of course I can go google something, but the value of a community like HN is that the sources shared by members here tend to be good ones (or at least better than average). Your refusal to contribute followed by a No True Scotsman argument are pretty disappointing.
        syops 5y ago
        There is another possible conclusion. Namely, that what I wrote is indeed true as to why I didn't post links. This topic is sort of like an anti-vax topic. I can post lots of links that vaccines are safe and worth taking but if someone is too obtuse to even bother to look up the relevant information themself then nothing I post/say will sway them. Hence, posting links to scientific research to an anti-vaxxer is meaningless. It's not a "no true Scotsman" argument because I'm not making an argument. I'm simply stating why I didn't post links. That isn't an argument it's just a rationalization for why I didn't post links to the research. It's really quite easy to find stuff written about the destructive aspects to porn. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/experimentations/201803/4-ways-porn-use-causes-problems https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/experimentations/201...
  - dqv 5y ago
    It's kind of like how social media warps our perception of what people (should) look like. Or how many vacations we should be going on [0,1]. Porn can affect how long we think sex should last and the positions we think we should be in [2]. Yes, even vanilla porn. While I think the anti-porn movement started with a religious-purity undertone, the secular explanations for why porn isn't such a great idea are convincing [3]. I would also ask anyone engaging in this discussion to replace the word "porn" with "alcohol" and see if it makes sense. Examine if it is useful to respond "well not everyone gets addicted to alcohol" when discussing the problems with alcohol. At least with me, there is an implied understanding that it's possible to use porn without getting addicted (even if I am becoming more skeptical of this assumption). [0]: https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/how-the-decades-rise-of-social-media-changed-travel.html https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/how-the-decades-ri... [1]: https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/traveling-for-social-media-is-gaining-momentum-for-2020.html https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/traveling-for-soci... [2]: https://www.npr.org/2019/05/25/723192364/what-we-dont-talk-about-when-we-talk-about-porn https://www.npr.org/2019/05/25/723192364/what-we-dont-talk-a... (Consider whether the violence argument is useful in this discussion. I personally don't believe violence activates as many neural pathways as arousing images and orgasm.) [3]: https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/research/ https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/research/
- reshie 5y ago
  expectations is perhaps a personality problem and lack of honest communication. normal is subjective even if it is inherited from societal norms. communication and being able to talk freely is key.
  - 1123581321 5y ago
    Humans have trouble communicating freely and honestly. They do better when they have fewer misleading assumptions to work through.
AussieWog93 5y ago
>I’d wager that truly unhealthy kinks are uncommon. The algorithm on PornHub promotes incest videos so heavily that creators of regular porn have started putting words like "stepmom", "step-sister" and "step-daughter" in the title of their videos even when the actual content has nothing to do with that. It's one of the reasons I stopped using the site and went over to Reddit.
- rkk3 5y ago
  Not just the Algorithm. Each major company has a family-xxx studio for their content. They have significant production value & popular performers, which feeds the optimization cycle. God only know's what societal effect it has when you fetish step children like that at scale.
  - dk775 5y ago
    Beyond that there are categories that I believe normalize behaviors such as transgenders, where the reasons for their increased visibility in wider society cannot be uncoupled. So it muddies the waters whether the porn, is playing any role, and prevents critical questioning of root causes. which in this case “sissy hypno genre” within trans porn directly tells viewers they want to be a girl and get fucked over and over. This is a large portion of transgender porn genre that viewers will eventually rabbithole to w the algorithm. Personally I’d be very skeptical of supporting my child transitioning if it was rooted in blatant porn brainwashing such as this.
    - AussieWog93 5y ago
      I would be beyond surprised if trans porn was a significant factor in peoples' decision to transition.
r0b05 5y ago
There are a few, but what about sexualization of teenagers and children. Do you think it's uncommon? You don't need to wager, just look at the amount of content available for a kink and you can establish demand.

Virtually all sex acts can be done in a healthy way provided both parties are truly into it. Porn has created expectations in men as to what women normally want and as a result a lot of women do sex acts that they don't truly like. Porn has distorted the view of what is 'normal' and the expectations of what a woman should consent to.

haswell 5y ago
The parent comment asks for specifics, but you go back to generalizing porn in response. > Porn has distorted the view of what is ‘normal’ Surely you mean some porn, but you have not clarified which types. What do you say to plain, “vanilla” porn that pushes no boundaries? As with so many things, this is not a black or white issue, and statements like your final sentence do nothing to advance a nuanced conversation about the subject.
- syops 5y ago
  It's easy to find research on the topic. The research supports my view.
  - haswell 5y ago
    So share the research that supports your view… As the person making claims without evidence, the onus is on you at this point. You’re not going to change minds if you’re not willing to share where you’re coming from.
    - syops 5y ago
      A person sufficiently interested in exploring whether or not I'm right can easily use a search engine and find the research. If a person can't be bothered to do that on their own then I think nothing I post will change their mind. An intellectually curious person will delve into the issue once they see dissenting opinions being expressed.
      - haswell 5y ago
        Someone else in the thread was kind enough to share what they felt are good sources, so I’ll take a look at those. I can only conclude that you have nothing to back your position, and you are postulating based on 2nd hand information. Of course I can go google something, but the value of a community like HN is that the sources shared by members here tend to be good ones (or at least better than average). Your refusal to contribute followed by a No True Scotsman argument are pretty disappointing.
        syops 5y ago
        There is another possible conclusion. Namely, that what I wrote is indeed true as to why I didn't post links. This topic is sort of like an anti-vax topic. I can post lots of links that vaccines are safe and worth taking but if someone is too obtuse to even bother to look up the relevant information themself then nothing I post/say will sway them. Hence, posting links to scientific research to an anti-vaxxer is meaningless. It's not a "no true Scotsman" argument because I'm not making an argument. I'm simply stating why I didn't post links. That isn't an argument it's just a rationalization for why I didn't post links to the research. It's really quite easy to find stuff written about the destructive aspects to porn. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/experimentations/201803/4-ways-porn-use-causes-problems https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/experimentations/201...
- dqv 5y ago
  It's kind of like how social media warps our perception of what people (should) look like. Or how many vacations we should be going on [0,1]. Porn can affect how long we think sex should last and the positions we think we should be in [2]. Yes, even vanilla porn. While I think the anti-porn movement started with a religious-purity undertone, the secular explanations for why porn isn't such a great idea are convincing [3]. I would also ask anyone engaging in this discussion to replace the word "porn" with "alcohol" and see if it makes sense. Examine if it is useful to respond "well not everyone gets addicted to alcohol" when discussing the problems with alcohol. At least with me, there is an implied understanding that it's possible to use porn without getting addicted (even if I am becoming more skeptical of this assumption). [0]: https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/how-the-decades-rise-of-social-media-changed-travel.html https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/how-the-decades-ri... [1]: https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/traveling-for-social-media-is-gaining-momentum-for-2020.html https://www.travelpulse.com/news/features/traveling-for-soci... [2]: https://www.npr.org/2019/05/25/723192364/what-we-dont-talk-about-when-we-talk-about-porn https://www.npr.org/2019/05/25/723192364/what-we-dont-talk-a... (Consider whether the violence argument is useful in this discussion. I personally don't believe violence activates as many neural pathways as arousing images and orgasm.) [3]: https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/research/ https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/research/
reshie 5y ago
expectations is perhaps a personality problem and lack of honest communication. normal is subjective even if it is inherited from societal norms. communication and being able to talk freely is key.
- 1123581321 5y ago
  Humans have trouble communicating freely and honestly. They do better when they have fewer misleading assumptions to work through.

AussieWog93 5y ago

>I’d wager that truly unhealthy kinks are uncommon. The algorithm on PornHub promotes incest videos so heavily that creators of regular porn have started putting words like "stepmom", "step-sister" and "step-daughter" in the title of their videos even when the actual content has nothing to do with that. It's one of the reasons I stopped using the site and went over to Reddit.

rkk3 5y ago
Not just the Algorithm. Each major company has a family-xxx studio for their content. They have significant production value & popular performers, which feeds the optimization cycle. God only know's what societal effect it has when you fetish step children like that at scale.
- dk775 5y ago
  Beyond that there are categories that I believe normalize behaviors such as transgenders, where the reasons for their increased visibility in wider society cannot be uncoupled. So it muddies the waters whether the porn, is playing any role, and prevents critical questioning of root causes. which in this case “sissy hypno genre” within trans porn directly tells viewers they want to be a girl and get fucked over and over. This is a large portion of transgender porn genre that viewers will eventually rabbithole to w the algorithm. Personally I’d be very skeptical of supporting my child transitioning if it was rooted in blatant porn brainwashing such as this.
  - AussieWog93 5y ago
    I would be beyond surprised if trans porn was a significant factor in peoples' decision to transition.

r0b05 5y ago

There are a few, but what about sexualization of teenagers and children. Do you think it's uncommon? You don't need to wager, just look at the amount of content available for a kink and you can establish demand.