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Just to add to the story. My sister claimed for 10+ years she had the DMV book and just needed to study it before getting her permit. She said this repeatedly t

Just to add to the story. My sister claimed for 10+ years she had the DMV book and just needed to study it before getting her permit. She said this repeatedly to my father and brother and no one questioned her. For 10+ years. Then a year ago I just called a driving school near my parents house on her behalf. I offered to pay for everything including study time and taxi rides to and from the school. Whatever it took. She said she still needed more time to read the book, but I said the school would help her. So when the time finally came to schedule a pickup time, she texted me and just said that she isn't interested in learning to drive. So that basically ended our relationship since this lie was too much. Now the only lever I have left is shunning her for her irresponsible life-style choices that put a burden on others. It has had no effect on her but at least I sleep better.

bitexploder 5y ago
Is someone enabling this behavior in her life? My sister is the same way. My parents enabled her for a decade. Now she is 34 and has minimal life skills and no real job skills to speak of. She just works at a day care. It is a tragedy, but my parents bail her out every time and they barely have many resources themselves. My sister can at least drive and has mostly had a job for a few years now... but that is a recent development.
shkkmo 5y ago
> It has had no effect on her I doubt that. It sounds to me like none of your family does a very good job of understanding her. The behavior you describe sounds much less like someone who is uninterested in driving and more like someone who has significant anxiety around that activity that they are surpressing.
staticman2 5y ago
Yeah I agree with the poster that said she is scared of driving. I'm guessing the excuse that she needed to read the book was either her using an excuse to self deceptively avoid facing her fear or just an attempt to save face by not saying how fearful she was.
tsss 5y ago
She is obviously scared of driving.
SyzygistSix 5y ago
So at no point did anyone figure that she was experiencing pathological amounts of anxiety around learning to drive, and most likely other ordinary activities? That sounds to me like an issue mental healthcare professionals help address.

bitexploder 5y ago

Is someone enabling this behavior in her life? My sister is the same way. My parents enabled her for a decade. Now she is 34 and has minimal life skills and no real job skills to speak of. She just works at a day care. It is a tragedy, but my parents bail her out every time and they barely have many resources themselves. My sister can at least drive and has mostly had a job for a few years now... but that is a recent development.

shkkmo 5y ago

> It has had no effect on her I doubt that. It sounds to me like none of your family does a very good job of understanding her. The behavior you describe sounds much less like someone who is uninterested in driving and more like someone who has significant anxiety around that activity that they are surpressing.

staticman2 5y ago

Yeah I agree with the poster that said she is scared of driving. I'm guessing the excuse that she needed to read the book was either her using an excuse to self deceptively avoid facing her fear or just an attempt to save face by not saying how fearful she was.

tsss 5y ago

She is obviously scared of driving.

SyzygistSix 5y ago

So at no point did anyone figure that she was experiencing pathological amounts of anxiety around learning to drive, and most likely other ordinary activities? That sounds to me like an issue mental healthcare professionals help address.