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To solve a problem, we need to be smarter than the problem - or the problem needs to be dumber than us. When vocalizing something, you're forced to constrict t

To solve a problem, we need to be smarter than the problem - or the problem needs to be dumber than us. When vocalizing something, you're forced to constrict the blob of complexity you're carrying in your head into a linear narrative, which is by definition simpler. Now that you have simplified the problem you are more likely to get hold of it and solve it. This happens all the time - when I am solving a technical/logical problem, sometimes I feel like my wife thinks I am just staring blankly at the screen day-dreaming. So I get insecure and start to explain to her how hard the problem is, but because she's a physician I have to translate it into common language first, and 99% of the time I say "never mind, got it" before I have a chance to really bore her. Come to think of it, this may be how therapy works. You are forced to take all the "mess" that's in your head and narrate it to someone else, in the process getting much simpler perspective on it. Writing is the same way for me. For example, all the ideas in this post were in my head in some amorphous way, but now that I wrote them out they became neat little analogies I can use in the future.

TeMPOraL 6y ago
> Come to think of it, this may be how therapy works. You are forced to take all the "mess" that's in your head and narrate it to someone else, in the process getting much simpler perspective on it. On a related note: some people close to me like to unload the contents of their head at me. I couldn't understand why - I initially assumed this was a kind of "I need someone to emphasize with me and validate my feelings" thing. Hearing roughly similar thoughts about the same issue for the fifth time in a month got particularly tiresome, and I struggled to understand why these people are doing it. Until one day I looked at the evening "mind dumps" I take in my .org mode file, and it hit me: it's the same thing. It has the same cadence, and same tendency to jump back and forth between related topics. Much like I sort through my thoughts by writing them down in solitude, these people are sorting through their thoughts by talking at me. All that time, I've just been a rubber duck. That is to say: I think not only this may be how therapy works, I think many (most?) people do this in social context - perhaps being afraid or unacustommed to talking to themselves, or to writing thoughts down (one needs to be a fast typist to write at the speed of thought, which is perhaps why this kind of sorting your thoughts through writing isn't as popular as through talking).
- xyzelement 6y ago
  > That is to say: I think not only this may be how therapy works, I think many (most?) people do this in social context - perhaps being afraid or unacustommed to talking to themselves, or to writing thoughts down I agree with that. I see my wife maintain her perspective by talking through with friends and family first. I do the same by writing.
- whatshisface 6y ago
  One advantage of talking to someone instead of writing is that they will perk up and catch anything wrong or suspicious you say. This could be as simple as a factual inaccuracy, or as subtle as an emotional misapprehension. Of course, you need people in your life who can deal with hearing something wrong in a fruitful way for this to work - but if you have them, it's a very valuable benefit.
wruza 6y ago
This may have downsides, especially with first simple words that come to mind (like in “everything is X” or “this is <adjective>”). Words turn ideas into a network of associative meanings that already exist and may fix them in stone once you get used to it. This happened to me many times so I got a habit of asking a lot of questions first rather than verbalizing ideas asap, and then using handmade verbs/adjs/nouns to describe thin differences. As a russian classic said, feelings and emotions turned into words lose their power. Like a deep overwhelming emotion if analyzed and verbalized may turn into “I like her feet” if you didn’t use/know approriate terms or concepts before.
- xyzelement 6y ago
  Right - but no risk of that here because: 1. You've already struggled with the amorphity by the time you vocalized it. So you're not missing it. 2. If you over-simplify it, you'll just not find a solution, so you know.
amelius 6y ago
> you're forced to constrict the blob of complexity you're carrying in your head into a linear narrative, which is by definition simpler. Not necessarily, for example a compiler thinks a tree (AST) is simpler than a linear representation ...
imperialdrive 6y ago
Your gift is impressive, and I'm thankful. Kudos for sharing.

TeMPOraL 6y ago

> Come to think of it, this may be how therapy works. You are forced to take all the "mess" that's in your head and narrate it to someone else, in the process getting much simpler perspective on it. On a related note: some people close to me like to unload the contents of their head at me. I couldn't understand why - I initially assumed this was a kind of "I need someone to emphasize with me and validate my feelings" thing. Hearing roughly similar thoughts about the same issue for the fifth time in a month got particularly tiresome, and I struggled to understand why these people are doing it. Until one day I looked at the evening "mind dumps" I take in my .org mode file, and it hit me: it's the same thing. It has the same cadence, and same tendency to jump back and forth between related topics. Much like I sort through my thoughts by writing them down in solitude, these people are sorting through their thoughts by talking at me. All that time, I've just been a rubber duck. That is to say: I think not only this may be how therapy works, I think many (most?) people do this in social context - perhaps being afraid or unacustommed to talking to themselves, or to writing thoughts down (one needs to be a fast typist to write at the speed of thought, which is perhaps why this kind of sorting your thoughts through writing isn't as popular as through talking).

xyzelement 6y ago
> That is to say: I think not only this may be how therapy works, I think many (most?) people do this in social context - perhaps being afraid or unacustommed to talking to themselves, or to writing thoughts down I agree with that. I see my wife maintain her perspective by talking through with friends and family first. I do the same by writing.
whatshisface 6y ago
One advantage of talking to someone instead of writing is that they will perk up and catch anything wrong or suspicious you say. This could be as simple as a factual inaccuracy, or as subtle as an emotional misapprehension. Of course, you need people in your life who can deal with hearing something wrong in a fruitful way for this to work - but if you have them, it's a very valuable benefit.

wruza 6y ago

This may have downsides, especially with first simple words that come to mind (like in “everything is X” or “this is <adjective>”). Words turn ideas into a network of associative meanings that already exist and may fix them in stone once you get used to it. This happened to me many times so I got a habit of asking a lot of questions first rather than verbalizing ideas asap, and then using handmade verbs/adjs/nouns to describe thin differences. As a russian classic said, feelings and emotions turned into words lose their power. Like a deep overwhelming emotion if analyzed and verbalized may turn into “I like her feet” if you didn’t use/know approriate terms or concepts before.

xyzelement 6y ago
Right - but no risk of that here because: 1. You've already struggled with the amorphity by the time you vocalized it. So you're not missing it. 2. If you over-simplify it, you'll just not find a solution, so you know.

amelius 6y ago

> you're forced to constrict the blob of complexity you're carrying in your head into a linear narrative, which is by definition simpler. Not necessarily, for example a compiler thinks a tree (AST) is simpler than a linear representation ...

imperialdrive 6y ago

Your gift is impressive, and I'm thankful. Kudos for sharing.