4 ms·

I'm a bit surprised very few people mention proximity to parents, family, and long time friends as a major reason of picking a place to live. The discussion is

I'm a bit surprised very few people mention proximity to parents, family, and long time friends as a major reason of picking a place to live. The discussion is mostly around beaches, scenery, and climate. It seems that either social capital is not that important for most commenters, or many simply don't realize what they lose when they move to another country for beaches and scenery.

fxtentacle 6y ago
Haha, I was about to comment "right here". I live in the small city where I was born, so within 30 minute walking distance of my parents, one of my sisters, and a few of my friends. It's amazing because our kids can play together and we can easily have the proud grandparents come over for help. Plus, friends can come over for a drink and then walk back home. I did live in Singapore, Vietnam, and the Canary Islands for a while, which was also great, but for different reasons. I'd say the focus on travel in here just shows that most HN readers are younger than me, so they don't have to plan for kids yet.
bipson 6y ago
I think it is an age thing. If you're younger or at least not "settled"/bound by family obligations you want to see/enjoy things e.g. you didn't or don't currently have in your life - most people prefer exotic places, e.g. "beach". The importance of family and friends comes once you realize it actually doesn't really matter that much where you live (unless it is downright terrible to live there). Life is what you make off it - this goes for your "place" as well. And for some people, their friends are essential to do that. For others not at all. I would have never moved for family unless it concerns my household. I only moved once because of "friends"/people I knew when deciding where to study. Wasn't really stupid, just the wrong reason. It is never easier to make friends than as an 18 year old beginning your studies. I always intended to move after studying to work abroad for a few years. Scandinavia or California would have been awesome. I prefer not to move at all now because I/we prefer stability in life now as parents. The doctors we know, the shops we know, the handymen we know - and life isn't that terrible where we are and the daily struggles interesting enough. I would work remote to be able to stay where I am right now, just as an example. Having moved across the continent as a kid I don't fear moving - I just prefer not to unless really necessary. Moving across the country in a few years, to a place I know more "adolescent-friendly" and with "nicer people" to build a house is still an option for me though - but harder for my partner to feel comfortable with. I guess a lot of people (including my dad) are more adventurous and need to see the "foreign land", but everyone has their own incentives and anchors.
rovr138 6y ago
I would 100% move back to Puerto Rico. My mom, sisters, long time friends, family, beaches, scenery, mountains, hurricanes, etc. I’ll take it all. I would need to be able to have and run a central AC like here though. All I hear from friend is how hot it is right now.
- gautamcgoel 6y ago
  You also get some pretty sweet tax breaks, right? I seem to recall reading that somewhere.
  - rovr138 6y ago
    There are some nice tax breaks for tech companies on the island. If you freelance or do contract work, it would be best to get a company setup for that.
kirso 6y ago
This deserves to be a top comment. Once you hustled your life away and have your life full of regrets that you haven't spent it with your loved ones - you realise that location is a pretty useless qualifying factor for life unless your family and closest ones are around.

fxtentacle 6y ago

Haha, I was about to comment "right here". I live in the small city where I was born, so within 30 minute walking distance of my parents, one of my sisters, and a few of my friends. It's amazing because our kids can play together and we can easily have the proud grandparents come over for help. Plus, friends can come over for a drink and then walk back home. I did live in Singapore, Vietnam, and the Canary Islands for a while, which was also great, but for different reasons. I'd say the focus on travel in here just shows that most HN readers are younger than me, so they don't have to plan for kids yet.

bipson 6y ago

I think it is an age thing. If you're younger or at least not "settled"/bound by family obligations you want to see/enjoy things e.g. you didn't or don't currently have in your life - most people prefer exotic places, e.g. "beach". The importance of family and friends comes once you realize it actually doesn't really matter that much where you live (unless it is downright terrible to live there). Life is what you make off it - this goes for your "place" as well. And for some people, their friends are essential to do that. For others not at all. I would have never moved for family unless it concerns my household. I only moved once because of "friends"/people I knew when deciding where to study. Wasn't really stupid, just the wrong reason. It is never easier to make friends than as an 18 year old beginning your studies. I always intended to move after studying to work abroad for a few years. Scandinavia or California would have been awesome. I prefer not to move at all now because I/we prefer stability in life now as parents. The doctors we know, the shops we know, the handymen we know - and life isn't that terrible where we are and the daily struggles interesting enough. I would work remote to be able to stay where I am right now, just as an example. Having moved across the continent as a kid I don't fear moving - I just prefer not to unless really necessary. Moving across the country in a few years, to a place I know more "adolescent-friendly" and with "nicer people" to build a house is still an option for me though - but harder for my partner to feel comfortable with. I guess a lot of people (including my dad) are more adventurous and need to see the "foreign land", but everyone has their own incentives and anchors.

rovr138 6y ago

I would 100% move back to Puerto Rico. My mom, sisters, long time friends, family, beaches, scenery, mountains, hurricanes, etc. I’ll take it all. I would need to be able to have and run a central AC like here though. All I hear from friend is how hot it is right now.

gautamcgoel 6y ago
You also get some pretty sweet tax breaks, right? I seem to recall reading that somewhere.
- rovr138 6y ago
  There are some nice tax breaks for tech companies on the island. If you freelance or do contract work, it would be best to get a company setup for that.

kirso 6y ago

This deserves to be a top comment. Once you hustled your life away and have your life full of regrets that you haven't spent it with your loved ones - you realise that location is a pretty useless qualifying factor for life unless your family and closest ones are around.