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You know they say that if you go to prison the longer you stay... more and more people start abandoning you just because of time. I'm talking about over a perio
by crimsonalucard 6y ago
You know they say that if you go to prison the longer you stay... more and more people start abandoning you just because of time. I'm talking about over a period of 10-20 years. Eventually contact is lost because everyone moves on.
First your girlfriend stops visiting, then your wife, then your kids.
They say the one connection that stays constant are your parents. If you're in jail for 20 years your parents will love you till the day you die and that love never fades. No one will ever love you as much as your parents.
The connection is one way unfortunately. Children will never love their parents as much as their parents love them.
As bad as your relationship is with your parents. Once they're gone, you're pretty much alone.
- soulofmischief 6y agoYou obviously haven't met my mother. Every time I see my mom these days she's asking for money for drugs or is too busy wrapped in her phone to have a conversation. And I know plenty other people whose love for their parents far outweighs the love their parents show in return. Mother's Day is always a slog for me as I internally sort my desire for respect and sense of humanitarian duty.
- pupppet 6y agoOof that's harsh, sorry you got a dud.
- tw04 6y agoIndeed. There are absolutely parents who match his description but to say that's every parent is more than a bit of a stretch.
- crimsonalucard 6y agoIt's definitely not every parent nor is it even almost every parent. I would say it's the majority though, as in over 50% for sure.
- crimsonalucard 6y agoOf course there are exceptions. But the general rule stands. I say the above from anecdotal experience from my parents and other parents I know, and from quotations I hear from people actually living in prison. I guess drugs throw off all the priorities, because in the end the actual mechanism that triggers love is in itself a chemical/drug as well.
- soulofmischief 6y agoIf you're making a general rule, I would refrain from using absolutisms like "never" which alienate the outliers like myself and invalidate your statement. It's deeper than drugs. The drug problem is a symptom of the greater problem: selfishness and complete lack of responsibility.
- proximitysauce 6y ago> As bad as your relationship is with your parents. Once they're gone, you're pretty much alone. Absolutely untrue. If your parents are toxic and damaging, you should cut them from your life. Some people can't live healthy lives if they keep contact with their abusive parents.
- crimsonalucard 6y agoI'm in total agreement with you. If your parents are toxic, dump them for sure. Not every parent is like my description, I'm just describing a generality that describes the majority. Despite this, I truly believe the statement below: If you don't have parents that will stick with you while you're still in prison for 30 years, then you don't have anyone on the face of this earth who will do this for you. You are alone.
- proximitysauce 6y agoThat's kinda a crappy message to be spreading on Mother's Day for people who don't have parents (or aren't in contact with them) tbh.
- rat9988 6y agoI still agree with his point of view
- crimsonalucard 6y agoI'm sorry. Just telling the truth. I mostly posted because I feel a lot of people have bad relationships with parents that actually do love them but for various other reasons (psychological problems, poverty, stress, drugs etc... ) ended up just having a bad relationship with their parents. I think it's absolutely worth it to try and establish contact and maintain a relationship if you feel that the relationship problems are superficial and underneath it all your parents do love you. In that article, the mother lost contact with both of her children. It is not a trivial situation to be in when both children don't want contact. She must have done many things that were really serious and really horrible. But her last email she wrote that she loves both of them no matter what, and I think that is real. What I am saying is that as imperfect as people are as much damage and toxicity they have done, if you sense that underneath it all there's genuine love then it's absolutely worth maintaining that relationship because you're never going to get someone to love you like this again. If true love even exists, it can only exist from parent to child.
- throwaway9482 6y ago“Once they’re gone you’re pretty much alone” All this says is how you feel about your life, many of us out here have completely different situations, including myself
- crimsonalucard 6y agoMaybe what you say is true. Tell me about your situation. I know that when someones parents are toxic and abusive they need to be cut off. However, for many parents when the situation is reversed they do not have a choice. The love is too great and the parents have to stick with the child until the very very end. If you murdered someone, a good number of parents will never abandon you. They will give up everything to help you including their own lives. Do you have a friend or someone other than your parents who will stick with you no matter what? Tell me about it.