6 ms·

I think a lot of the rhetoric in this article could also be applied to people who struggled in school early on due to an unknown mental health diagnosis, essent

I think a lot of the rhetoric in this article could also be applied to people who struggled in school early on due to an unknown mental health diagnosis, essentially internalizing that they’re either too stupid or lazy to succeed. As someone who had great parents, but parents who denied mental health as an issue or excessively large tonsils as a trigger for sleep apnea and behavioral issues a lot in this article resonates. Especially given my experience finally seeking professional help after college and realizing that a lot of why I’d been struggling was because of ADHD likely caused by sleep apnea caused by my tonsils. Seeing this drastic change in mood and my mental ability was life changing, but to this day sometimes I still catch myself re-itorating the words of my HS guidance counselor telling me I didn’t have the grades to study at an elite college or to be an engineer.

dfsegoat 7y ago
Lifelong ADDer here. Yes, the damage of lifelong undiagnosed mental / attentional issues is absolutely a real and crippling thing. You HAVE to break those patterns and the negative self-talk. Cognitive behavioral therapy is helpful for this. Probably the biggest thing I've found helpful was David Goggins book "Can't hurt me: Master your mind and defy the odds". [1]: >>"For David Goggins, childhood was a nightmare — poverty, prejudice, and physical abuse colored his days and haunted his nights. But through self-discipline, mental toughness, and hard work, Goggins transformed himself from a depressed, overweight young man with no future into a U.S. Armed Forces icon and one of the world's top endurance athletes..." The audible version is PHENOMENAL IMO. He talks explicitly about learning disabilities and attentional issues - but be-forewarned his language is very raw, but it is 100% authentic. 1 - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41721428-can-t-hurt-me https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41721428-can-t-hurt-me
jigglesniggle 7y ago
This is kind of dangerous. The article is basically saying you should not demand more of society. I had problems in school and everyone brushed me off -- am I not right to be angry? Am I not right to demand I get the same consideration that others got? What do I need to do to do it, get back into school, and get the same free money?
- corodra 7y ago
  Well, let's put it this way. Being a Polish-Jew in a rural, and very southern high school in Florida, one where I was considered a minority because there were no other minorities, wasn't all roses. Then when it came to being a white male applying for scholarships. More than half of those scholarship books pretty much told me that I need not apply. My post high school education is quite lacking because of it. It took me a while in my 20s to realize how much of a benefit all of that was. And to quit being angry. Compared to all my peers from high school, I have a pretty damn good amount of resiliency. There's already a few known suicides in my graduating class, post-graduating. Plenty of drug addiction. Only a few folks really escaped like I did. But even them, when I touched based with them, it's all doom and gloom. In my early 20s, I faced an eviction, plenty of debt, debt collectors and lots of other problems that, well, never crushed me. Honestly, a lot of problems I shrugged off and found solutions. I think the worst thing that's ever affected me was my cats dying a few months ago. That, honestly, was the worst thing that happened to me, even though I was homeless for a while, couldn't find work, scrapped to pay for food. I could do all that again if I have to. Losing a pet... that hurts. But that brings me to the next, and I think biggest benefit from all those problems from school. I have a "sixth sense" on people's intentions. Just a gut reaction that's been correct every time. You have no idea how beneficial this has been since I went into business for myself. It also means, I have zero tolerance for assholes and incompetence. The time I save from wasting time on assholes, I spend on my real friends. I value my real friends and have tight relationships with them. Something my generation really doesn't have. Now, I am abrasive to people the moment I realize someone is underhanded, a user, asshole, etc. Even if they're mostly strangers and it's only been 5 minutes since I met them. But my friends are fully aware that I'm loyal, without end, to them. And thus far, every time I ignored that gut feeling on someone being bad, it always bit me in the ass. If I listened, I would find out from someone else a few months later on what bullet I just dodged. At the end, the world truly owes you nothing. Having a rough life is actually a blessing. It builds resilience and teaches you to greater appreciate the good and not focus on the toxic. Without experiencing hate, you can't truly love. Plus, you can't blame the entire world population over what a group of teenagers did. The older you get, the more you realize all teens, all over the world, are an equal amount of stupid.
  - 7y ago
uwuhn 7y ago
I got my tonsils removed in high school and it was life-changing. I didn't have oversized tonsils, but I would get tonsilitis 2-3 times a year.

dfsegoat 7y ago

Lifelong ADDer here. Yes, the damage of lifelong undiagnosed mental / attentional issues is absolutely a real and crippling thing. You HAVE to break those patterns and the negative self-talk. Cognitive behavioral therapy is helpful for this. Probably the biggest thing I've found helpful was David Goggins book "Can't hurt me: Master your mind and defy the odds". [1]: >>"For David Goggins, childhood was a nightmare — poverty, prejudice, and physical abuse colored his days and haunted his nights. But through self-discipline, mental toughness, and hard work, Goggins transformed himself from a depressed, overweight young man with no future into a U.S. Armed Forces icon and one of the world's top endurance athletes..." The audible version is PHENOMENAL IMO. He talks explicitly about learning disabilities and attentional issues - but be-forewarned his language is very raw, but it is 100% authentic. 1 - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41721428-can-t-hurt-me https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/41721428-can-t-hurt-me

jigglesniggle 7y ago

This is kind of dangerous. The article is basically saying you should not demand more of society. I had problems in school and everyone brushed me off -- am I not right to be angry? Am I not right to demand I get the same consideration that others got? What do I need to do to do it, get back into school, and get the same free money?

corodra 7y ago
Well, let's put it this way. Being a Polish-Jew in a rural, and very southern high school in Florida, one where I was considered a minority because there were no other minorities, wasn't all roses. Then when it came to being a white male applying for scholarships. More than half of those scholarship books pretty much told me that I need not apply. My post high school education is quite lacking because of it. It took me a while in my 20s to realize how much of a benefit all of that was. And to quit being angry. Compared to all my peers from high school, I have a pretty damn good amount of resiliency. There's already a few known suicides in my graduating class, post-graduating. Plenty of drug addiction. Only a few folks really escaped like I did. But even them, when I touched based with them, it's all doom and gloom. In my early 20s, I faced an eviction, plenty of debt, debt collectors and lots of other problems that, well, never crushed me. Honestly, a lot of problems I shrugged off and found solutions. I think the worst thing that's ever affected me was my cats dying a few months ago. That, honestly, was the worst thing that happened to me, even though I was homeless for a while, couldn't find work, scrapped to pay for food. I could do all that again if I have to. Losing a pet... that hurts. But that brings me to the next, and I think biggest benefit from all those problems from school. I have a "sixth sense" on people's intentions. Just a gut reaction that's been correct every time. You have no idea how beneficial this has been since I went into business for myself. It also means, I have zero tolerance for assholes and incompetence. The time I save from wasting time on assholes, I spend on my real friends. I value my real friends and have tight relationships with them. Something my generation really doesn't have. Now, I am abrasive to people the moment I realize someone is underhanded, a user, asshole, etc. Even if they're mostly strangers and it's only been 5 minutes since I met them. But my friends are fully aware that I'm loyal, without end, to them. And thus far, every time I ignored that gut feeling on someone being bad, it always bit me in the ass. If I listened, I would find out from someone else a few months later on what bullet I just dodged. At the end, the world truly owes you nothing. Having a rough life is actually a blessing. It builds resilience and teaches you to greater appreciate the good and not focus on the toxic. Without experiencing hate, you can't truly love. Plus, you can't blame the entire world population over what a group of teenagers did. The older you get, the more you realize all teens, all over the world, are an equal amount of stupid.
- 7y ago

uwuhn 7y ago

I got my tonsils removed in high school and it was life-changing. I didn't have oversized tonsils, but I would get tonsilitis 2-3 times a year.