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So, what should self worth be based on? "I'm valuable just because I exist?" I'm not suggesting that's what you mean, but to me, that interpretation would be a

So, what should self worth be based on? "I'm valuable just because I exist?" I'm not suggesting that's what you mean, but to me, that interpretation would be a bit arrogant. Isn't there some value in partially placing our self worth based on other's opinions-- so we can attempt to reproduce/be more of the things others find best in ourselves?

mparkola 7y ago
I struggle with this as well as I read many warnings against deriving self-worth from external sources. However I am not free from that and I don't think I'll ever be. I draw the line at excessive rumination when someone does NOT provide that external validation or criticizes me outright.
TravelN0mad 7y ago
> "I'm valuable just because I exist?" That's a start. What missguided thinking would suggest otherwise? But that doesn't mean, that you are valuable (able to provide value) to someone else. However, the point about self worth, I like to make is: self worth starts with you - based on experience, and obviously supported by a feedback loop you gain confidence in what you're good at, and what not. So, the best way to gain self worth is by gaining confidence, is by gaining experience.
Clubber 7y ago
You should determine your own self worth and it should not be reliant on the compliments of others. The problem with being reliant on compliments is what happens if you are in an environment that doesn't give out compliments? Parents and teachers give you compliments to help you along, bosses usually don't or it's not often. On the flip side, what happens if you are in an environment that gives out half hearted, polite, or just plain fake compliments? Does your self worth get artificially inflated? Your paycheck is the compliment and that's all your self worth should require outside of your own self assessment. (Wow this started to get philosophical quick).

mparkola 7y ago

I struggle with this as well as I read many warnings against deriving self-worth from external sources. However I am not free from that and I don't think I'll ever be. I draw the line at excessive rumination when someone does NOT provide that external validation or criticizes me outright.

TravelN0mad 7y ago

> "I'm valuable just because I exist?" That's a start. What missguided thinking would suggest otherwise? But that doesn't mean, that you are valuable (able to provide value) to someone else. However, the point about self worth, I like to make is: self worth starts with you - based on experience, and obviously supported by a feedback loop you gain confidence in what you're good at, and what not. So, the best way to gain self worth is by gaining confidence, is by gaining experience.

Clubber 7y ago

You should determine your own self worth and it should not be reliant on the compliments of others. The problem with being reliant on compliments is what happens if you are in an environment that doesn't give out compliments? Parents and teachers give you compliments to help you along, bosses usually don't or it's not often. On the flip side, what happens if you are in an environment that gives out half hearted, polite, or just plain fake compliments? Does your self worth get artificially inflated? Your paycheck is the compliment and that's all your self worth should require outside of your own self assessment. (Wow this started to get philosophical quick).