5 ms·

I remember there was a moment back in the late 90ies many who already worked with the Web joked on usenet etc that "the Internet is becoming mainstream" (usuall

I remember there was a moment back in the late 90ies many who already worked with the Web joked on usenet etc that "the Internet is becoming mainstream" (usually as an eye-roll reaction to trolls or somebody gullible forwarding a hoax email ...) I think we made a big mistake trying to convince everyone that the digital life is like real. E.g. you can have real conversations etc. (they are real but not the same, maybe our discussions online are too real idk), please bear with me ... IMO there has been a huge interest by Tech to make everyone believe that Online life is very much like real life, for some of us it even did become so (SecondLife, gaming, etc). And there are many calls to enforce real-name policies and to outlaw anonymity in Tech. The theory is that this will improve authenticity, get rid of trolls ("if only we could back this with more security, root of trust", etc). But when I just judge from myself, how I use the web ... I am not actually "really me" in the same sense. Even posting under my real name I often catch myself having provided some kind of snapshot of my inner state of mind or general feeling, and which to my horror shouldn't be taken at face value (yet it is because I said it and it is written). When speaking pseudonymously it allows me to air half-baked thoughts and feelings so that I can get feedback (in a safe way) and then allows to improve my thinking on the subject. I wonder would I say the same things under my real identity ? and the scary answer is sometimes I accidentally do. And I guess others also make these mistakes. Compartmentalizing is really hard and once I said shit the cat is out of the bag ... what was written may haunt me forever. Getting judged by a prospective employer wading through our social media footprint is already reality, and before entering some countries I have to unlock my phone now. None of this is supposed to be like that IMO because we humans don't compartmentalize our thoughts the same way when we are online as we do when we have a conversation IRL What tricks us into thinking that "just because we say it we should stick to it", because we use the written form. By saying it in our head and WRITING IT DOWN, it becomes very hard to take a step back and retract our position. Writing things down is one of the keys in how we commit to something according to Robert Caldini[1]. And because we usually write online our not well thought out positions (spitballing), we end up making these spitballs our personal hills to die on. This is something we haven't yet realized: ONLINE != IRL, yet we want to force people to believe it is the same. [1] Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion https://www.amazon.com/Influence-Psychology-Persuasion-Robert-Cialdini/dp/006124189X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1JAZDBSVAC45X&keywords=influence+robert+cialdini&qid=1562336848&s=gateway&sprefix=influence%2Caps%2C1700&sr=8-1 https://www.amazon.com/Influence-Psychology-Persuasion-Rober...

wayoutthere 7y ago
Totally agree with you here! I use forums like these as a way to pressure-test crazy ideas, or ways I tell a story. My post history is probably full of crazy shit as a result. In no way will I ever link this account to my real name; in fact I’ll probably abandon it in a few months and start another. As a result, I also tend to take online argumentation to be more of an academic exercise than one capable of changing opinions. You can also argue the opposing side of an issue to understand the nuance there. But the net takeaway is that the online world does not represent reality; it represents all the possibilities of reality — which can sometimes be horrifying.
WorldMaker 7y ago
The problem is that "online" still has real consequences: those spitballs that become personal hills to die on bleed back out into the real world as partisanship or, worse, violence. Things that are written may not just haunt us forever, but things that we read may as well. Mental health is something culturally we don't have strong controls on, and yet evidence backs that our physical health is strongly correlated to our mental health. I think the thing we haven't yet realized is not just that online != "real life" but that online is worse than real life: it's a Fairy space. Anything we can imagine can become real enough online that it affects our real life (health, wealth, etc). On the surface it is shiny and whimsical, and underneath it is full of monsters (of our own creation, most likely). We exist in a time where nearly everyone has a magic mirror to a fairy space in their pocket, and old fairytales tell us we should be frightened and proceed with huge amounts of caution.
- nradov 7y ago
  Caution is unnecessary. People are responsible for their own mental health. It's not my problem.
  - WorldMaker 7y ago
    We are a social species. We call them "memes" and discuss the "virality" of content for multiple reasons. It's starting to feel that mental health is a lot like herd immunity and the mental health of an individual is directly related to the overall mental "vaccination state" of their community. Unfortunately compared to real world germ theory, we don't have a lot of good ideas yet for what mental "vaccinations" even are.

wayoutthere 7y ago

Totally agree with you here! I use forums like these as a way to pressure-test crazy ideas, or ways I tell a story. My post history is probably full of crazy shit as a result. In no way will I ever link this account to my real name; in fact I’ll probably abandon it in a few months and start another. As a result, I also tend to take online argumentation to be more of an academic exercise than one capable of changing opinions. You can also argue the opposing side of an issue to understand the nuance there. But the net takeaway is that the online world does not represent reality; it represents all the possibilities of reality — which can sometimes be horrifying.

WorldMaker 7y ago

The problem is that "online" still has real consequences: those spitballs that become personal hills to die on bleed back out into the real world as partisanship or, worse, violence. Things that are written may not just haunt us forever, but things that we read may as well. Mental health is something culturally we don't have strong controls on, and yet evidence backs that our physical health is strongly correlated to our mental health. I think the thing we haven't yet realized is not just that online != "real life" but that online is worse than real life: it's a Fairy space. Anything we can imagine can become real enough online that it affects our real life (health, wealth, etc). On the surface it is shiny and whimsical, and underneath it is full of monsters (of our own creation, most likely). We exist in a time where nearly everyone has a magic mirror to a fairy space in their pocket, and old fairytales tell us we should be frightened and proceed with huge amounts of caution.

nradov 7y ago
Caution is unnecessary. People are responsible for their own mental health. It's not my problem.
- WorldMaker 7y ago
  We are a social species. We call them "memes" and discuss the "virality" of content for multiple reasons. It's starting to feel that mental health is a lot like herd immunity and the mental health of an individual is directly related to the overall mental "vaccination state" of their community. Unfortunately compared to real world germ theory, we don't have a lot of good ideas yet for what mental "vaccinations" even are.