4 ms·

Okay. So what are you going to do about it?

111 points by khingebjerg 16y ago

patio11 16y ago
If only there were a cheap, easy way to automatically send appointment reminders in Mandarin. ;) (Sadly, HIPAA -- American health privacy legislation -- means that there is a lot of uncertainty about whether they can actually use it or not, and since I'm not a lawyer and don't have an extra $100k lying around I can't resolve that ambiguity at the moment.)
- jonknee 16y ago
  AFAIK you're good to go as long as you don't reveal any patient information (called PHI in the HIPAA world). So instead of leaving a message like, "Calling to confirm John Doe's appointment at Johnson Health Institute" it would need to be "Calling to confirm an appointment at Johnson Health Institute". That way if the number is incorrect for some reason there hasn't been a breach of privacy.
- deleted 16y ago
  [deleted]
edw519 16y ago
This is exactly what happened to me 2 days ago at my haircut. My barber and I enjoy talking about the Pittsburgh Steelers (American football). Somehow, our discussion turned into my nonstop complaining... "I hate when they run up the middle on first down!" "The referees call too many penalties!" "The kicker should go back to bagging groceries!" "The announcers don't understand the game!" "Instant replay ruins the experience!" "They should just pounce on fumbles instead of trying to pick them up and run with them!" Finally, he said, "Well then, what are you going to do about it?" I answered the only way I could, "I'm going to drink more beer and yell louder at the TV. Maybe, just maybe, someone will hear me and do what I say."
- DanielBMarkham 16y ago
  Yelling at the TV is a long-established American tradition. :) Sebastian's got a great article here -- he's really been on a roll lately. The only thing I'd add is that sometimes you can't do anything. When I read that book on stoicism last month, one of the key points was that you need to sort out the things you can change, the things you can't, and the things you have some bit of leverage with. Ignore the things you can't change, act on the ones you can. The ones in the middle -- the things you can change but only a little bit -- you internalize, separating the parts that you own and the parts you don't. For instance, you can't make yourself win a sports match. But you _can_ make sure you play the game as absolutely the best as possible. This is such a simple observation -- almost stupidly simple -- yet we keep getting the three categories mixed up, worrying about stuff we can't change, and giving up on things we can.
  - alex_c 16y ago
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer
- deleted 16y ago
  [deleted]
- mashmac2 16y ago
  Interesting comparison to the Speed-Freak Football article from yesterday (http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1969332 http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1969332). For those who missed it, the Oregon football team's offense is playing faster then the referees move the first down markers and return balls, changing the sport. The fans respond by booing the refs!
- jimbokun 16y ago
  So about an hour and a half from now, we know you will be drinking much beer and yelling progressively louder at the TV. :) EDIT: "The kicker should go back to bagging groceries!" Neglected to mention that this one seems to have worked. :)
- lionhearted 16y ago
vsync 16y ago
Great post. This is similar to the idea of a site my friend and I put together called Lessons Learned (http://lessonslearnedby.us/ http://lessonslearnedby.us/). We've only just started coding on it again after focusing on ramping up another more easily monetizable project with investor interest, but even in its simplest form we found that it makes a huge difference when walking away from a situation to say not just "well that rocked/sucked" or even "won't do that again" but to ask ourselves "what lesson can I learn from this?" It seems being mindful and asking the right questions, consistently, pays immense dividends. I'm adding this question to my list. One could even say I've "learned" a "lesson" :)
jonknee 16y ago
I have come across this in my city--lots of people complaining and fewer people changing things (almost all of whom are quieter than the complainers). The easiest thing to do is complain and it's very rarely helpful. The reason why things aren't optimal (for you) isn't because no one has had the opportunity to complain.
raintrees 16y ago
Unless I am listening to my wife. Usually, she doesn't want solutions from me, just an ear :) That, and no more lists...
- gfodor 16y ago
  Arguably this is more sound advice than the one in the article. More often than not (particularly in relationships) complaining is a toll on the road to getting over it, whatever it is.
deleted 16y ago
[deleted]
jharrison 16y ago
What do you do when the answer is, "Nothing"? I find myself in situations that I really really want to change but can't come to a solution that I feel will work for everyone involved (family). My solution is basically to delay action and tell myself that THAT is my solution, for now. One of the comments in the post was to "change your mind". Maybe that's what I'm doing.
jeberle 16y ago
A former boss of mine had a simple rule: you can't complain unless you can suggest an alternative. It was a great source of ideas.
deleted 16y ago
[deleted]
ig1 16y ago
While I agree with the sentiments behind this post, complaining is often used as a way of venting frustrations that you can't do something about (trivially anyway). It helps people feel less frustrated if they can complain about it.

111 points by khingebjerg 16y ago

If only there were a cheap, easy way to automatically send appointment reminders in Mandarin. ;) (Sadly, HIPAA -- American health privacy legislation -- means that there is a lot of uncertainty about whether they can actually use it or not, and since I'm not a lawyer and don't have an extra $100k lying around I can't resolve that ambiguity at the moment.)

jonknee 16y ago
AFAIK you're good to go as long as you don't reveal any patient information (called PHI in the HIPAA world). So instead of leaving a message like, "Calling to confirm John Doe's appointment at Johnson Health Institute" it would need to be "Calling to confirm an appointment at Johnson Health Institute". That way if the number is incorrect for some reason there hasn't been a breach of privacy.
deleted 16y ago
[deleted]

edw519 16y ago

This is exactly what happened to me 2 days ago at my haircut. My barber and I enjoy talking about the Pittsburgh Steelers (American football). Somehow, our discussion turned into my nonstop complaining... "I hate when they run up the middle on first down!" "The referees call too many penalties!" "The kicker should go back to bagging groceries!" "The announcers don't understand the game!" "Instant replay ruins the experience!" "They should just pounce on fumbles instead of trying to pick them up and run with them!" Finally, he said, "Well then, what are you going to do about it?" I answered the only way I could, "I'm going to drink more beer and yell louder at the TV. Maybe, just maybe, someone will hear me and do what I say."

DanielBMarkham 16y ago
Yelling at the TV is a long-established American tradition. :) Sebastian's got a great article here -- he's really been on a roll lately. The only thing I'd add is that sometimes you can't do anything. When I read that book on stoicism last month, one of the key points was that you need to sort out the things you can change, the things you can't, and the things you have some bit of leverage with. Ignore the things you can't change, act on the ones you can. The ones in the middle -- the things you can change but only a little bit -- you internalize, separating the parts that you own and the parts you don't. For instance, you can't make yourself win a sports match. But you _can_ make sure you play the game as absolutely the best as possible. This is such a simple observation -- almost stupidly simple -- yet we keep getting the three categories mixed up, worrying about stuff we can't change, and giving up on things we can.
- alex_c 16y ago
  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer
deleted 16y ago
[deleted]
mashmac2 16y ago
Interesting comparison to the Speed-Freak Football article from yesterday (http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1969332 http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1969332). For those who missed it, the Oregon football team's offense is playing faster then the referees move the first down markers and return balls, changing the sport. The fans respond by booing the refs!
jimbokun 16y ago
So about an hour and a half from now, we know you will be drinking much beer and yelling progressively louder at the TV. :) EDIT: "The kicker should go back to bagging groceries!" Neglected to mention that this one seems to have worked. :)
lionhearted 16y ago

vsync 16y ago

Great post. This is similar to the idea of a site my friend and I put together called Lessons Learned (http://lessonslearnedby.us/ http://lessonslearnedby.us/). We've only just started coding on it again after focusing on ramping up another more easily monetizable project with investor interest, but even in its simplest form we found that it makes a huge difference when walking away from a situation to say not just "well that rocked/sucked" or even "won't do that again" but to ask ourselves "what lesson can I learn from this?" It seems being mindful and asking the right questions, consistently, pays immense dividends. I'm adding this question to my list. One could even say I've "learned" a "lesson" :)

jonknee 16y ago

I have come across this in my city--lots of people complaining and fewer people changing things (almost all of whom are quieter than the complainers). The easiest thing to do is complain and it's very rarely helpful. The reason why things aren't optimal (for you) isn't because no one has had the opportunity to complain.

raintrees 16y ago

Unless I am listening to my wife. Usually, she doesn't want solutions from me, just an ear :) That, and no more lists...

gfodor 16y ago
Arguably this is more sound advice than the one in the article. More often than not (particularly in relationships) complaining is a toll on the road to getting over it, whatever it is.

deleted 16y ago

[deleted]

jharrison 16y ago

What do you do when the answer is, "Nothing"? I find myself in situations that I really really want to change but can't come to a solution that I feel will work for everyone involved (family). My solution is basically to delay action and tell myself that THAT is my solution, for now. One of the comments in the post was to "change your mind". Maybe that's what I'm doing.

jeberle 16y ago

A former boss of mine had a simple rule: you can't complain unless you can suggest an alternative. It was a great source of ideas.

deleted 16y ago

[deleted]

ig1 16y ago

While I agree with the sentiments behind this post, complaining is often used as a way of venting frustrations that you can't do something about (trivially anyway). It helps people feel less frustrated if they can complain about it.