8 ms·
Another Side of MeToo: Male Managers Fearful of Mentoring Women
- nzbahz 8y agoIsn't that the way it's always worked? A friend who works at a university told me how male professors always leave the door open when they are talking with female students in their offices. They can easily ruin your life... just like that.
- knorby 8y agoThe professors ruining the students' life through traumatic actions done to the students, right? I'm sure that's what you meant.
- nzbahz 8y agoWhat's the traumatic action here? A female student not being able to force a professor to change a grade under the threat of being called a rapist?
- knorby 8y agoRape and sexual assault come to mind, since that's what happens far more often than blackmail for petty ends. Plenty of studies have shown how bunk your claim is. It is a sexist conspiracy theory.
- loco5niner 8y agoHonestly, it works both ways, unfortunately. But an open door can protect both parties.
- geofft 8y agoThe way I heard it is less that "they" (the women) can ruin your life as that other people might infer something untoward which would be bad for both of you, but yes. The other option is to have glass walls for offices instead of opaque ones, but that requires having some foresight in building architecture.
- twunde 8y agoI knew one ex-coworker who was also a part-time professor who would always make sure that there was a second person anytime he was with a student.
- sakuul 8y agoNo, it's not!
- emmanuel_1234 8y agoHaving worked in a French university, around 2005-2010, we actually received an explicit memo that male should not receive female students in their office without a third person being there.
- aries1980 8y agoHow does this stop two of them conspiring against the third one?
- hyeonwho4 8y ago> to identify men who make women uncomfortable This is a very revealing trick: start with sexual harassment, but segue into a focus on workplace discomfort. It shouldn't be a manager's problem that their professional communication makes team members uncomfortable. Workplace social discomfort is universal, and it should not be a barometer for MeToo.
- geofft 8y ago> It shouldn't be a manager's problem that their professional communication makes team members uncomfortable. I would think it's quite the opposite - the purpose of a manager is to make their teams effective and keep up morale so they can be productive. If a manager's approach to "professional communication" makes their team members uncomfortable, that's a sign they're a bad manager, just like if my approach to "professional sysadminning" makes my teammates uncomfortable and fearful, I'm a bad sysadmin. Communicating well and productively and in a way that doesn't make people uncomfortable is a skill. Like any other skill, it's learnable to some extent and there's innate aptitude to some extent and if you don't have the skill you're not qualified for the job.
- dools 8y agoSomeone should tell these guys about the Rock Test: https://medium.com/@annevictoriaclark/the-rock-test-a-hack-for-men-who-dont-want-to-be-accused-of-sexual-harassment-73c45e0b49af https://medium.com/@annevictoriaclark/the-rock-test-a-hack-f... It's not rocket science (it's the Rock science!)
- etxm 8y agoDoes that mean Karen’s rich ass is going to buy me coffee??
- bassman9000 8y agoArticle misses the point. It's not the fear of being denounced for being inappropriate. It's the fear of being denounced even when you behave appropriately.
- dools 8y agoWhich is about as probable as being struck by lightning, being the victim of a terrorist attack or being bitten by a shark. All these things belong in the Jeopardy category "remote risks that loom large in popular culture for no good reason".
- WalterSear 8y agoFrom multiple experiences, I know this to be untrue. It's consequently misandrist. And softly misogynist.
- geofft 8y agoThis isn't new - the "Billy Graham rule" has been around since around 1948. My parents taught it to me. It's received some recent news as Mike Pence adopted it. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Graham_rule https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Graham_rule The question is whether you think that the self-protection from scandal is worth the systemic discrimination the rule requires you to do.
- ravitation 8y agoThis would be systematic discrimination, not systemic.
- geofft 8y agoIf an entire denomination has historically male clergy and believes in following the Billy Graham rule, is it not systemic, too? (But yeah, if it's just me by myself in an otherwise-equitable industry, yes. I'm not convinced I'm in an otherwise-equitable industry though.)
- ravitation 8y agoYou are talking about a type of discrimination that you explicitly say "you" (i.e. one) choose to do, not about the nature of the evangelical clergy. Unless the "you" in your statement is only supposed to be a stand-in for the evangelical clergy reading your comment... Which I took it to not be.
- jdc 8y agoSee also the Aniyata rules from the Theravada Buddhist monastic code, dating back to the early part of the first millenium (BC). https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Patimokkha#Aniyata https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Patimokkha#Aniyata
- loco5niner 8y ago>The question is whether you think that the self-protection from scandal is worth the systemic discrimination the rule requires you to do. From a Christian perspective(both Billy Graham and Mike Pence are Christians) it's honestly more about being true to your wife than avoiding scandal (though it is both). It's the same reason many Christian men put internet filters on their phones and computers, to protect themselves (and their relationships) from themselves.
- charliebrownau 8y agoGlobal Socialist LEFT :- * Blame ALL WESTERN MEN * Remove due Process * Duthal Model makes Men guilty automatically when ANY crime has a female in it (since the 70s) * remove due process & have kangaroo courts in Western Universities * Blame ALL men for rape, dv, crime * refuse to arrest WOMEN with the same crime for the same punishment/conviction * Refuse to hold WOMEN accountable for lying about RAPE and DV ---------- Men CHOOSE to walk away from Helping wamans Dating wamans Cohabit with wamans Marrying wamans No more free food No more free lifts No more free beer/wine Men start to record themselfs via CCTV and audio bugs 1 week later after news of wall street doing that Canada cucked system BANS the use of footage for EVIDENCE against waman Are you REALLY FUCKING SURPRISED WHEN MEN REFUSE TO HELP WOMEN WAKE THE FUCK UP
- x0f1a 8y agoThe problem is really complex. As a manager sometimes needing to give bad feedback, or assinging unpleasant tasks to females direct reports, it is always stressful for me. There is a chance that even without malice, the female subordinate interpret that I am being unfair or punishing her. So I just avoid it, I don’t know how to approach hierarchy that sometimes generate uncomfortable situations with a metoo era. The solution is not what the article suggests, I have daughters and I want a better world for them, but this is not about educating managers.