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I believe the grandparent comment was in regards to people in your home treating you as if you were "at home". This means your kids/spouse would ask you to do s

by foldor 8y ago

I believe the grandparent comment was in regards to people in your home treating you as if you were "at home". This means your kids/spouse would ask you to do something for them that they wouldn't do if you were "at work". I can agree with him though, that if you're working from home, you need to be able to tell people that no, you can't unload the dishwasher, you're "at work".

krageon 8y ago
One of my parents did this for years, so going purely from experience it's a matter of good communication: When I'm in my study, I am at work. Do not go in there or disturb me unless the house is on fire. Problem solved. I don't really get why a lot of people feel this is an insurmountable obstacle. Surely being able to outline your boundaries and people keeping to them is a core component of a healthy relationship?
- undecisive 8y ago
  Yeah, from personal experience, I spent two years working remotely from home, then a year in a co-working space with colleagues. It wasn't until I then went back to remote working that my wife finally started to 'get' these boundaries - mostly when I started musing about renting a co-working space! I'm not a very assertive person. She is a very assertive person. That really doesn't help. Some people think boundaries are for everyone else. (It didn't help that her mum has always worked from home, and rarely enforced any boundaries.) And at the time, the only desk space was in the middle of a main thoroughfare in the flat. But yes, totally agree. Those years where there were no boundaries were some of the most stressful of my life. The usual inferiority complex, coupled with thinking "I would get so much more done if I wasn't constantly interrupted" is enough to send you crazy or end relationships. We survived though. It still isn't always plain sailing, but mostly it's better. I have my own little office space, away from the day-to-day world. And mostly I can keep my door open, and know I'm unlikely to be disturbed.
  - isostatic 8y ago
    > "I would get so much more done if I wasn't constantly interrupted" This is exactly what I get if I try to work in an office. That said, I do visit an office every few weeks to interrupt people -- it's amazing how much information you can get through occasionally doorstepping people you don't work directly with on a regular basis.
- michaelt 8y ago
  I don't really get why a lot of people feel this is an insurmountable obstacle. Simple enough: 1. You start with a bright line demarcation "I work X am to Y pm in the office with no disturbances" 2. You make a change that is totally reasonable, but removes the bright line. "As long as I get my Z hours a week done, of course I can accept occasional interruptions during the day" After all, why not help your partner with the kids, or get some exercise during the daylight? Everyone is OK with that! 3. Now nobody knows whether it's OK to interrupt you or not.
  - setr 8y ago
    I feel like if the interruption amounts to "Are you free right now?" -- "No.", it's not that concerning. It shouldn't be that difficult to build the expectation that if you're in the study, no one should expect you to be free, and if you're out of it, eg taking a break, then they can. But this particular issue seems trivially resolvable, as long as you manage expectations appropriately. In my own experience, my dad randomly worked from home (mainly when his day consisted of calls), and I just never assumed he was free; at least in the sense that I quietly asked, and naturally expected a "give me 10 minutes", and waited an hour before bugging him again.
noneeeed 8y ago
This is my problem with the idea of working from home at the moment. While we do have a spare room I could use, I think the possiblity for distraction would be too significant. Once my youngest is in school in a couple of years it might become more of an option, but I'd still have the same issue during the holidays. Basically I need a larger house to really make it work though. A friend of mine has an office-shed in his garden, which would be perfect if we had the space but sadly ours is too small for that.
dfsegoat 8y ago
Ahh thank you - yes, I did have a bit of that problem but my wife did help out a lot to shield me from kids etc.

by foldor 8y ago

krageon 8y ago

One of my parents did this for years, so going purely from experience it's a matter of good communication: When I'm in my study, I am at work. Do not go in there or disturb me unless the house is on fire. Problem solved. I don't really get why a lot of people feel this is an insurmountable obstacle. Surely being able to outline your boundaries and people keeping to them is a core component of a healthy relationship?

undecisive 8y ago
Yeah, from personal experience, I spent two years working remotely from home, then a year in a co-working space with colleagues. It wasn't until I then went back to remote working that my wife finally started to 'get' these boundaries - mostly when I started musing about renting a co-working space! I'm not a very assertive person. She is a very assertive person. That really doesn't help. Some people think boundaries are for everyone else. (It didn't help that her mum has always worked from home, and rarely enforced any boundaries.) And at the time, the only desk space was in the middle of a main thoroughfare in the flat. But yes, totally agree. Those years where there were no boundaries were some of the most stressful of my life. The usual inferiority complex, coupled with thinking "I would get so much more done if I wasn't constantly interrupted" is enough to send you crazy or end relationships. We survived though. It still isn't always plain sailing, but mostly it's better. I have my own little office space, away from the day-to-day world. And mostly I can keep my door open, and know I'm unlikely to be disturbed.
- isostatic 8y ago
  > "I would get so much more done if I wasn't constantly interrupted" This is exactly what I get if I try to work in an office. That said, I do visit an office every few weeks to interrupt people -- it's amazing how much information you can get through occasionally doorstepping people you don't work directly with on a regular basis.
michaelt 8y ago
I don't really get why a lot of people feel this is an insurmountable obstacle. Simple enough: 1. You start with a bright line demarcation "I work X am to Y pm in the office with no disturbances" 2. You make a change that is totally reasonable, but removes the bright line. "As long as I get my Z hours a week done, of course I can accept occasional interruptions during the day" After all, why not help your partner with the kids, or get some exercise during the daylight? Everyone is OK with that! 3. Now nobody knows whether it's OK to interrupt you or not.
- setr 8y ago
  I feel like if the interruption amounts to "Are you free right now?" -- "No.", it's not that concerning. It shouldn't be that difficult to build the expectation that if you're in the study, no one should expect you to be free, and if you're out of it, eg taking a break, then they can. But this particular issue seems trivially resolvable, as long as you manage expectations appropriately. In my own experience, my dad randomly worked from home (mainly when his day consisted of calls), and I just never assumed he was free; at least in the sense that I quietly asked, and naturally expected a "give me 10 minutes", and waited an hour before bugging him again.

noneeeed 8y ago

This is my problem with the idea of working from home at the moment. While we do have a spare room I could use, I think the possiblity for distraction would be too significant. Once my youngest is in school in a couple of years it might become more of an option, but I'd still have the same issue during the holidays. Basically I need a larger house to really make it work though. A friend of mine has an office-shed in his garden, which would be perfect if we had the space but sadly ours is too small for that.

dfsegoat 8y ago

Ahh thank you - yes, I did have a bit of that problem but my wife did help out a lot to shield me from kids etc.