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> It seems to me like people skills are a weak spot for you. That's not true as I always hangout with the people in different teams, and, we get along pretty w

• Tactic 8y ago
  If you don't want to quit the team/job, then I would recommend trying to adopt the viewpoint that regardless of your manager's shortcomings (we all have them) at least they understand your value as a technical resource. However, if this: > I can't stand to report to him remains true... the only solution in the end that will leave you with day-to-day satisfaction is to leave the situation. It sounds like you are aware of this. Life is not always fair but in general it is consistent.
• beat 8y ago
  If you can't stand to report to him, then you find another job, or at least find another department within your company so you're not under him. And it probably wouldn't hurt to talk about this conflict with other managers you do trust at the company (if you don't trust any of them, the problem almost certainly isn't them). I've been in your shoes - a peer got promoted to be my manager when our old manager retired. We were okay as peers, but very bad in a hierarchy, and I eventually got fired. I should have just quit instead. Still, though, I think you're letting resentment blind you. It's easy to be the hero of your own story, and for anyone you're in conflict with to be the villain, but that doesn't mean it's right. We're all unreliable narrators. Try this exercise. Repeat after me... "I may be wrong. I am often wrong." This is my mantra. Recognize your own fallibility. Try looking at it from the perspective of "What if I'm wrong?" It solves a lot of problems (or leads to the correct solutions). And the more you do it, the easier it is. Consider my earlier point, that what he did isn't incompetence - not if his goal was to get out of technical and into management. And since he's apparently good at those people things, he might well be recognizing where his talents are, doing the right thing for himself and the organization. Consider also a telling bit of evidence in your response to me - "we worked together for two years on a daily basis". If that's true, is it also true that you did all the work and he unfairly claimed credit? What was he doing, if he wasn't writing code? Is "kiss-ass" a fair assessment, or an resentful interpretation of his useful work? Try to stop being angry long enough to consider that.
• tdumitrescu 8y ago
  This is not likely to work out well for you. You disliked the guy when he was just your coworker, and now he's become your manager and you have this seething resentment ("I can't stand to report to him"), which I'm sure he and others can see. It can be difficult transitioning even to having a teammate you like become your manager, and the fact that you dislike him puts a 10x multiplier on that difficulty. A situation where you resent, distrust, and dislike your manager is not sustainable and in a lot of companies will end with your removal if you can't truly get over it. Assuming that you can't see yourself working happily with this guy as your manager (which, to be clear, I think is perfectly reasonable on your part), you could try to transfer to a different team if your company's big enough, but I'm guessing most likely this will end with you leaving the company either on your terms or theirs.