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Thank you so much for your questions. My high year in sales was 110k W2, 70k post tax, and 35k post expenses like food rent and car. My low year was 45k, aka

Thank you so much for your questions. My high year in sales was 110k W2, 70k post tax, and 35k post expenses like food rent and car. My low year was 45k, aka just plain old base salary, and after taxes and expenses I broke even. I was living in a pretty expensive part of Boston. I'm sure I could have found a really nasty bedroom for like $650 if I wanted to haha. Right now as a waiter I'm making about $600 a week pre tax. I just came off of a $400 weekend working only 16 hours! My rent here is $650 in a very very nice new apartment and I'm 15 mins from the beach, forest, and farms. I absolutely would do it all over again. I thank my girlfriend every day for basically forcing us to move out here to Eastern Long Island NY for her medical job, because I never would have had the courage to make this move myself. And, I thought it would be really hard to find a job in software out here, so I just applied to literally anything and the restaurant I work at now was the first offer I received. I plunged headfirst and got lucky! Other restaurants are less of a family than we are. Life isn't perfect and you need a few thousand in savings to get this all started without going insolvent, but so far I'm loving my new location and new industry. If you do go for it, maintain contacts elsewhere just in case! :)

pc86 8y ago
Just to run the numbers for everyone, this is $31,200 assuming no vacation all year. So making less money gross as a waiter than you're able to put into a savings account (after taxes and all expenses) as a software developer. I don't think that will be surprising information for anyone here. I've waited tables before and I'd rather be a software developer for half the median software developer salary than a waiter for 3x the median waiter salary.
- anoncoward111 8y ago
  Some points in response to this: I keep nearly all of my gross because of the standard deduction and the nature of cash tips. My rent is $650 a month whereas most people in the bay or in Boston are paying $2200 for equivalent quality. I dont spend 2 hours stuck in traffic or a hot subway every day-- most days I ride my moped which gets 90mpg and uses a hilariously cheap blend of oil and fuel from the hardware store. And, what is most important to me, and this is subjective, is that I actually feel stable and welcome at this employer. I was laid off from the job where I was making 110k gross and banking 30k. So, why not take a job where I'm grossing in the 30s and banking 15k?
  - toomuchtodo 8y ago
    Because you could be making $100k and banking $50k. Every hour you work is an hour you'll never get back. But, as you said, you feel welcomed by your employer and feel the job is stable. If this is what you prioritize, that's your decision.
    - okmokmz 8y ago
      >Because you could be making $100k and banking $50k. But is it really worth it if you have to live in an area you don't want to live, spend time commuting that you'd rather work on something else, etc. that could potentially affect one's stress/anxiety and even cause health issues? I'm aware that there are people with jobs making 6+ figures that are also very happy with their jobs, but I also don't think it's fair to frame his situation as a negative simply because he could be making more.
      - toomuchtodo 8y ago
        > But is it really worth it if you have to live in an area you don't want to live, spend time commuting that you'd rather work on something else, etc. that could potentially affect one's stress/anxiety and even cause health issues? Of course not. I'd encourage a passive job search of remote roles. One should always be looking for their next job. One should always be padding their emergency fund, so they have 6-12 months of reserves. The better your financial position, the more power you have over your own destiny.
  - Matticus_Rex 8y ago
    I think the point is that to frame it as either feeling shitty at a high-paying job or feeling good at a low-paying job is a false dichotomy.
  - lotsofpulp 8y ago
    >I keep nearly all of my gross because of the standard deduction and the nature of cash tips. Instead of the "nature of cash tips", it would be more accurate to state "the nature of people to evade taxes (or do other bad things as defined by society) when chances of being caught are sufficiently low". Also why I always use credit card and tip with credit card.
- pedrosorio 8y ago
  > So making less money gross as a waiter than you're able to put into a savings account (after taxes and all expenses) as a software developer. The OP worked in sales
- xivzgrev 8y ago
  Life is what you make of it. If he feels happy doing job X at 31200, then so be it. No need to look down on it. In fact be happy for him, there's already too much suffering in the world, so someone finding something they enjoy is a blessing. Also he was in software SALES not dev, so not an accurate comparison.
  - praneshp 8y ago
    I agree with your advice (no need to look down, etc). OP however came off as condescending (at least to me) when he said stuff like "breathe fresh air", "stuck in subway for 2 hours", etc in responses, making everything a zero sum game. The way I see it, he moved to wherever because his girlfriend forced him to, and then lucked into find a good job that they enjoy.
    - okmokmz 8y ago
      >OP however came off as condescending (at least to me) when he said stuff like "breathe fresh air", "stuck in subway for 2 hours", etc in responses, making everything a zero sum game. I don't think he was being condescending. I'm at a point where I would absolutely value fresh air, not having to commute more than 15-30 minutes a day, being able to live in a rural area where I can have privacy and space, and other benefits like that far more than the financial benefits. When I started my career I wanted to move up the ladder as quickly as possible so I can earn as much as possible, but I've realized that I really don't care about the money nearly as much as I thought. I don't make a ton, but I already earn more than I spend and am able to splurge on things frequently. If I had to opportunity to move somewhere like that with my girlfriend I absolutely would
      - rootusrootus 8y ago
        I think the point was you can get all of that and still make money at it. I live on the edge of a mid-size metro (Portland, Oregon) making north of 140K with excellent work-life balance, while living next to farmland in a little quiet neighborhood with a nice big yard, the school my kids go to is a hundred yards away, etc. So I don't see why you'd need to give up the job you enjoy just to get the things OP wants. You may need to live somewhere other than NYC or the bay area, but there are lots of places in the country where you can achieve these goals without having to live especially frugally. I don't care all that much about the money at this point but being able to sock away a bunch makes it less stressful to contemplate the future, college educations coming up in the future, etc.
wonderwonder 8y ago
Good for you, Cant put a price on reduced stress and happiness. I quit a developer job because of the massive stress and travel involved and took a 50% pay cut. I left software completely for 4 years. I was much happier. I am back in software now making 50% more than the prior software job I quit but I work from home and enjoy the industry. Sometimes a break for a few years is just what the doctor ordered.
- rootusrootus 8y ago
  There are so many places that pay well but are pleasant to work at. Especially in software development. If someone is unhappy they should pick up and leave, the market is good and the choices plentiful right now.
  - wonderwonder 8y ago
    absolutely, market is great right now, plenty of well paying choices out there.
jdhn 8y ago
The fact that you're in Eastern Long Island along with talking about the $400 weekend makes me think you're near the Hamptons. What are you going to do once the summer crowd winds down and it's only the locals frequenting your restaurant?
- anoncoward111 8y ago
  Not the Hamptons :) I would probably be doing $1000 weekends if I was on Dune Rd lol! The town specifically is Head of the Harbor. We've got a year round retiree crowd that comes out even on Mondays and Wednesdays to hear an 85 year old woman sing Sinatra ahha
TylerE 8y ago
Can I suggest that experience is a bit atypical? Eastern Long Island is rural, but it is also very very much old money.
- anoncoward111 8y ago
  It's definitely old money, yes. I don't think someone could replicate this in Kansas at the Cracker Barrel

pc86 8y ago

Just to run the numbers for everyone, this is $31,200 assuming no vacation all year. So making less money gross as a waiter than you're able to put into a savings account (after taxes and all expenses) as a software developer. I don't think that will be surprising information for anyone here. I've waited tables before and I'd rather be a software developer for half the median software developer salary than a waiter for 3x the median waiter salary.

anoncoward111 8y ago
Some points in response to this: I keep nearly all of my gross because of the standard deduction and the nature of cash tips. My rent is $650 a month whereas most people in the bay or in Boston are paying $2200 for equivalent quality. I dont spend 2 hours stuck in traffic or a hot subway every day-- most days I ride my moped which gets 90mpg and uses a hilariously cheap blend of oil and fuel from the hardware store. And, what is most important to me, and this is subjective, is that I actually feel stable and welcome at this employer. I was laid off from the job where I was making 110k gross and banking 30k. So, why not take a job where I'm grossing in the 30s and banking 15k?
- toomuchtodo 8y ago
  Because you could be making $100k and banking $50k. Every hour you work is an hour you'll never get back. But, as you said, you feel welcomed by your employer and feel the job is stable. If this is what you prioritize, that's your decision.
  - okmokmz 8y ago
    >Because you could be making $100k and banking $50k. But is it really worth it if you have to live in an area you don't want to live, spend time commuting that you'd rather work on something else, etc. that could potentially affect one's stress/anxiety and even cause health issues? I'm aware that there are people with jobs making 6+ figures that are also very happy with their jobs, but I also don't think it's fair to frame his situation as a negative simply because he could be making more.
    - toomuchtodo 8y ago
      > But is it really worth it if you have to live in an area you don't want to live, spend time commuting that you'd rather work on something else, etc. that could potentially affect one's stress/anxiety and even cause health issues? Of course not. I'd encourage a passive job search of remote roles. One should always be looking for their next job. One should always be padding their emergency fund, so they have 6-12 months of reserves. The better your financial position, the more power you have over your own destiny.
- Matticus_Rex 8y ago
  I think the point is that to frame it as either feeling shitty at a high-paying job or feeling good at a low-paying job is a false dichotomy.
- lotsofpulp 8y ago
  >I keep nearly all of my gross because of the standard deduction and the nature of cash tips. Instead of the "nature of cash tips", it would be more accurate to state "the nature of people to evade taxes (or do other bad things as defined by society) when chances of being caught are sufficiently low". Also why I always use credit card and tip with credit card.
pedrosorio 8y ago
> So making less money gross as a waiter than you're able to put into a savings account (after taxes and all expenses) as a software developer. The OP worked in sales
xivzgrev 8y ago
Life is what you make of it. If he feels happy doing job X at 31200, then so be it. No need to look down on it. In fact be happy for him, there's already too much suffering in the world, so someone finding something they enjoy is a blessing. Also he was in software SALES not dev, so not an accurate comparison.
- praneshp 8y ago
  I agree with your advice (no need to look down, etc). OP however came off as condescending (at least to me) when he said stuff like "breathe fresh air", "stuck in subway for 2 hours", etc in responses, making everything a zero sum game. The way I see it, he moved to wherever because his girlfriend forced him to, and then lucked into find a good job that they enjoy.
  - okmokmz 8y ago
    >OP however came off as condescending (at least to me) when he said stuff like "breathe fresh air", "stuck in subway for 2 hours", etc in responses, making everything a zero sum game. I don't think he was being condescending. I'm at a point where I would absolutely value fresh air, not having to commute more than 15-30 minutes a day, being able to live in a rural area where I can have privacy and space, and other benefits like that far more than the financial benefits. When I started my career I wanted to move up the ladder as quickly as possible so I can earn as much as possible, but I've realized that I really don't care about the money nearly as much as I thought. I don't make a ton, but I already earn more than I spend and am able to splurge on things frequently. If I had to opportunity to move somewhere like that with my girlfriend I absolutely would
    - rootusrootus 8y ago
      I think the point was you can get all of that and still make money at it. I live on the edge of a mid-size metro (Portland, Oregon) making north of 140K with excellent work-life balance, while living next to farmland in a little quiet neighborhood with a nice big yard, the school my kids go to is a hundred yards away, etc. So I don't see why you'd need to give up the job you enjoy just to get the things OP wants. You may need to live somewhere other than NYC or the bay area, but there are lots of places in the country where you can achieve these goals without having to live especially frugally. I don't care all that much about the money at this point but being able to sock away a bunch makes it less stressful to contemplate the future, college educations coming up in the future, etc.

wonderwonder 8y ago

Good for you, Cant put a price on reduced stress and happiness. I quit a developer job because of the massive stress and travel involved and took a 50% pay cut. I left software completely for 4 years. I was much happier. I am back in software now making 50% more than the prior software job I quit but I work from home and enjoy the industry. Sometimes a break for a few years is just what the doctor ordered.

rootusrootus 8y ago
There are so many places that pay well but are pleasant to work at. Especially in software development. If someone is unhappy they should pick up and leave, the market is good and the choices plentiful right now.
- wonderwonder 8y ago
  absolutely, market is great right now, plenty of well paying choices out there.

jdhn 8y ago

The fact that you're in Eastern Long Island along with talking about the $400 weekend makes me think you're near the Hamptons. What are you going to do once the summer crowd winds down and it's only the locals frequenting your restaurant?

anoncoward111 8y ago
Not the Hamptons :) I would probably be doing $1000 weekends if I was on Dune Rd lol! The town specifically is Head of the Harbor. We've got a year round retiree crowd that comes out even on Mondays and Wednesdays to hear an 85 year old woman sing Sinatra ahha

TylerE 8y ago

Can I suggest that experience is a bit atypical? Eastern Long Island is rural, but it is also very very much old money.

anoncoward111 8y ago
It's definitely old money, yes. I don't think someone could replicate this in Kansas at the Cracker Barrel