7 ms·

Getting married is expensive? How so?

anoncoward111 8y ago
The legal fees themselves aren't very expensive. If you can resist the societal pressures to have a large and extravagant wedding with many guests, then even the wedding itself isn't particularly expensive. The main cost of getting married is getting divorced. Legal fees add up a lot here, and the division of assets is costly. Now, you could argue your marriage won't end in divorce, but 60% of marriages in the US do.
- fixermark 8y ago
  Perhaps worth noting: that "60% of marriages end in divorce" number is quirky when you pull back the skin. 60% of marriages end in divorce, but most people who marry do not get divorced from their first marriage. The 60% number is bumped out due to the segment of the population that get married 3 or 4 times.
  - anoncoward111 8y ago
    Interesting, thank you :) I'm still seeing divorce rates of 30-40% for first marriages, depending on generation. Anecdotally, I know a lot of people who are either divorced in their 30s, or still unmarried in their 30s. Considering the difficulties a woman has conceiving beyond their mid 30s, I think the explanation is here in our faces. My grandma had 5 kids and was married at 19.
    - maccard 8y ago
      > My grandma had 5 kids and was married at 19. Funny that you've mentioned correlation and no causation, and then brought this up. How old was your grandma when she had her first kid?
- watwut 8y ago
  That division of assets is cheaper if you married someone who earns as much as you.
tathougies 8y ago
Getting married in a traditional way is cheap, but most people blow off tradition to get some fancy pinterest barn, with fancy pinterest lights, with some fancy pinterest minister, some fancy pinterest vows, and fancy pinterest invitations. We paid $80 for a marriage license. The church was free. The ceremony was free. The celebrant was free. The wedding was free. We also got married in the most beautiful church in San Francisco (in my opinion at least) We were going to use the church hall for the reception, but my parents wanted us to get another reception venue. That would have been free. A traditional cake and punch reception with some music would have set us back maybe $300, but even that could have been foregone. My wife's parents didn't do any of that. Just got married the old-fashioned way.
- anoncoward111 8y ago
  I am really happy for you, and wish you the best in your marriage :)
krinchan 8y ago
Let's not mention the taxes for getting married w/out children. Unless you have dependents (children) or one income (which makes one spouse the other spouse's dependent), getting married as a DINC (Dual Income, No Children) is a fiscal disaster in the US right now.

The legal fees themselves aren't very expensive. If you can resist the societal pressures to have a large and extravagant wedding with many guests, then even the wedding itself isn't particularly expensive. The main cost of getting married is getting divorced. Legal fees add up a lot here, and the division of assets is costly. Now, you could argue your marriage won't end in divorce, but 60% of marriages in the US do.

fixermark 8y ago
Perhaps worth noting: that "60% of marriages end in divorce" number is quirky when you pull back the skin. 60% of marriages end in divorce, but most people who marry do not get divorced from their first marriage. The 60% number is bumped out due to the segment of the population that get married 3 or 4 times.
- anoncoward111 8y ago
  Interesting, thank you :) I'm still seeing divorce rates of 30-40% for first marriages, depending on generation. Anecdotally, I know a lot of people who are either divorced in their 30s, or still unmarried in their 30s. Considering the difficulties a woman has conceiving beyond their mid 30s, I think the explanation is here in our faces. My grandma had 5 kids and was married at 19.
  - maccard 8y ago
    > My grandma had 5 kids and was married at 19. Funny that you've mentioned correlation and no causation, and then brought this up. How old was your grandma when she had her first kid?
watwut 8y ago
That division of assets is cheaper if you married someone who earns as much as you.

tathougies 8y ago

Getting married in a traditional way is cheap, but most people blow off tradition to get some fancy pinterest barn, with fancy pinterest lights, with some fancy pinterest minister, some fancy pinterest vows, and fancy pinterest invitations. We paid $80 for a marriage license. The church was free. The ceremony was free. The celebrant was free. The wedding was free. We also got married in the most beautiful church in San Francisco (in my opinion at least) We were going to use the church hall for the reception, but my parents wanted us to get another reception venue. That would have been free. A traditional cake and punch reception with some music would have set us back maybe $300, but even that could have been foregone. My wife's parents didn't do any of that. Just got married the old-fashioned way.

anoncoward111 8y ago
I am really happy for you, and wish you the best in your marriage :)

krinchan 8y ago

Let's not mention the taxes for getting married w/out children. Unless you have dependents (children) or one income (which makes one spouse the other spouse's dependent), getting married as a DINC (Dual Income, No Children) is a fiscal disaster in the US right now.