7 ms·

OK, obligatory inversion: What do you (programmer/etc.) know about your girlfriend's passion?

• jf 16y ago
  Yes. My wife is an artist. Learning more about her passion is fun and has tangibly enriched my life.
• mapleoin 16y ago
  That's exactly what I was thinking. This needs to be a major factor that I'll take into consideration in my next relationships. It's not just about my interest in what the other person is doing, it's also about that person taking the time and having the patience to explain what they're doing on a daily basis to someone from outside the field.
• russell 16y ago
  My GF is an artist who uses old masters' techniques to paint modern themes, like dead flowers and the washroom at an LA shipyard. So I know a bit about how they mixed paints, even to the point of grinding pigments myself. And color and composition and glazes and and and. I work 250 miles from home, so every evening we talk about painting. (And occasional rants about her dealings with the telecommunications infrastructure. :-) EDIT: Her work is absolutely stunning and I am very proud of her.
  • docgnome 16y ago
    Any examples?
    • russell 16y ago
      www.reilee.com Disclaimer: The site is a couple of years old and doesnt have her latest stuff. She has found it almost impossible to have her work photographed, even by professional photographers, so she hasn't me put up the new paintings. But go for it.
      • docgnome 16y ago
        Thanks! I really enjoyed those. I particularly liked The Letter.
• Hovertruck 16y ago
  My girlfriend is a photographer. Before I met her, I had heard a hundred and one photography terms, but never knew or cared about exposures and apertures and such. Listening to her talk about it is a great experience, because I love to hear her explain to an idiot like me what a low f-stop is. I feel like I'm genuinely learning. I also know that a photographer has never taken enough pictures. She can take 500 pictures on a trip to the grocery store and then go home and pick through and find the ones she likes. I'm a very self-conscious person and hate the way I look in pictures, but in the past two years I've probably appeared in hundreds upon hundreds of photographs. I've learned not to look when she starts pointing the camera, because she wants to capture what's going on and not a designed picture. Whenever I have a camera in my hands I try to actively apply the things she's taught me about photography. All in all, I'd like to think I'm not photographer, but I take great interest in what she does.
  • varikin 16y ago
    I have the same experience. My wife is a photographer and I could rattle of lots of stuff about Polaroids, medium format, the darkroom, film vs digital, and other things I would never know. I stiff can never remember what an f-stop is, but I pay attention. And she listens to me the the same way. It really matters, even when we don't know what the other is talking about.
• JshWright 16y ago
  My wife is a music teacher. I can comfortably discuss the contributions of people like Carl Orff and Émile Jaques-Dalcroze to modern music education theory. While I have never played an instrument in my life, I can hold my own in a graduate level music theory discussion (I know more about theory than any of my 'casual' musician friends). My wife, on the other hand, is far more likely to place Django in the context of an early 20th century Gypsy Jazz guitar player than a 21st century web framework...
• FraaJad 16y ago
  My wife loves writing about cooking from her part of the world, which she thinks is core to her and her community's identity. I host & manage the website and take pictures of her cooking experiments :)
• mahmud 16y ago
  My fiancee is a blues singer, song-writer, guitarist and actor. And yes, she does know what I do for work, she is my co-founder after all.
• tel 16y ago
  And people wonder why marriage is in such a downswing.
• krisneuharth 16y ago
  My wife is an attorney. I enjoy listening to the problems she faces in her cases. It is interesting to help her think of innovative solutions. It's a little like hacking code once you abstract away all the legal terms and focus on the concepts.
• lmkg 16y ago
  My girlfriend is actually the one with the CS background, not me--I'm a mathematician. She's working in Computer Vision right now, and I have a passing knowledge of the algorithms she uses, like SVMs. More importantly, I am now an adoring fan of doom metal, and have a greater appreciation for 18th century European literature and philosophy. I'm not sure I'll ever match her encyclopedic knowledge of obscure metal sub-genres (electro-Tolkien thrash metal?) but bands like Anathema and Ulver now dominate my last.fm account, and I have a finer appreciation for non-English-language films. Conversely, she just finished Half-Life 2: Episode 2. I'm so proud of her! I also taught her to cook, which brings me more joy than I can put in words.
  • cageface 16y ago
    Women that code SVMs, listen to Ulver, and read 18th century European literature actually exist?!?!? Does she have sisters?
    • timhill 16y ago
      I know (hope) this comment was made in jest, and I don't have an interest in starting up a "women in tech" flamewar, but this kind of comment really gets me. XKCD (http://xkcd.com/322/ http://xkcd.com/322/) has a good comic about this, as usual. "Joking" about how there are not any women who enjoy your hobbies just perpetuates the stereotype. And once learning about how awesome this woman is, what is the follow up comment? Wondering if she has any sisters, presumably so you can marry someone who looks like her. Wouldn't a much better comment be "Wow, someone who codes SVMs, listens to Ulver, and reads 18th century literature? Sounds like my ideal girlfriend."
      • cageface 16y ago
        Wouldn't a much better comment be "Wow, someone who codes SVMs, listens to Ulver, and reads 18th century literature? Sounds like my ideal girlfriend." I have never in my life met a woman who knows what an SVM is, or who Ulver is. Why should I get jumped on for wishing that I had? Who said anything about looks? Also, generally speaking, saying that somebody else's girlfriend sounds like your ideal girlfriend is considered a little too forward.
• ajdecon 16y ago
  My girlfriend plays roller derby and she absolutely loves it. I've not only learned what a blocker, pivot and jammer are, but all about the different permutations of wheels, bearings, and skates which are used to get every last bit of speed and maneuverability out of her skating. (And I've helped her learn to take them apart and put them back together!) She's only been involved in the league since January, but she's already hugely involved and helping to plan their events. It's been a huge thing for her, especially since she's only a year into living here and was flailing for something to do outside work.
• jseliger 16y ago
  My GF is in med school, so I now know why it's vastly smarter to go into nursing than medicine, why so many doctors are unhappy, and why Penelope Trunk is right when she says that medical and law school force you to overinvest: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/02/03/dont-try-to-dodge-the-recession-with-grad-school/ http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/02/03/dont-try-to-dodge-t... . In addition, I know that you don't want residents making major care decisions on their own.
  • megablast 16y ago
    MY ex was a surgeon. I am intrigued to hear your reason about why so many doctors are unhappy? More than any other overly bureaucratic profession?
    • potatolicious 16y ago
      The same reason why many engineers are unhappy - it's a professional that demands a lot of brain time and clock time, both leading to underdevelopment in other areas of your life. I'm fairly active in the volunteering community here in Seattle, and there are certainly many "meat market" volunteering groups here (read: ones where the implied purpose is dating, as opposed to just strictly doing good work). I've had them come through the places I normally work at, and the demographic usually breaks down to: - doctors - other medical professionals - lawyers - engineers Rarely do I see any other type. I suspect demanding professions make you a bit of a loner/shut-in/hermit, and thus unhappy.
      • megablast 16y ago
        Interesting idea, I was concerned you were singling out one profession, when you are actually talking about all higher professions then, such as law, etc...
      • zackattack 16y ago
        I am fascinated by this notion of 'meat market' volunteering groups. Can you provide me links to some? I don't live in Seattle, but I am very curious from a satirist's perspective.
• AmberShah 16y ago
  But this is not just a hobby, this is their life's work. Could you image if someone said their husband was "a doctor, or something like that..." and if you asked what they specialized in (surgeon, orthopedics, etc) you would have no idea? It's not about knowing HOW they do their job, it's about knowing WHAT they do. Anyways, my husband is a programmer and so am I so we don't have this problem, but another problem entirely...
  • amackera 16y ago
    vim > emacs?
    • AmberShah 16y ago
      More like MS/.NET vs Java/OSS
• jberryman 16y ago
  My GF is an incredible classical violinist. We met at music school, so I can relate to a lot of what she does quite well. But that doesn't mean I'm not consistently blown away by her skills and passion. She does a good job listening and trying to understand the computer things I'm working on and fascinated by.
• commanda 16y ago
  My boyfriend is a Python programmer. My main language is Obj-c. Of course we share a lot of languages in common, but I have an almost complete lack of Python experience, as does he with Obj-c. Together we wrote a simple url-shortener in Python (http://get.emo.gd/ http://get.emo.gd/), and with a little of my help, he has been dabbling in an iPad app that he's been wanting to write for ages.
• pbjorklund 16y ago
  Alot, but thats because I also find it interesting which renders the question, how you say, moot. :)
• GiraffeNecktie 16y ago
  My partner deals with assholes all day long. In fact, she does colonic irrigation.
• aristus 16y ago
  My wife is a writer and painter. I regularly frame her work, correct her English, sell her paintings, and do random carpentry, plastic and metal work in service of her art. For her part, she is also my first editor, and knows a lot about what I do, and has taught me so much about both language and art. edit I'm struck by the coincidence of geeks and artists in this thread. I'd suspected there was a correlation before, but, damn...
  • enneff 16y ago
    My partner is also an artist, and I am a programmer. Funny.
• teamonkey 16y ago
  I had an Atari ST while growing up, she had an Amiga 500, and yet we're still together.
  • mahmud 16y ago
    You married up ;-)
• dejv 16y ago
  My GF is scientists in molecular genetics (working on some type of cancer) so this is tricky field for people without background in biology, chemistry and medicine. I am in stage that I know what she does, but don't understand core principles.
• tjmc 16y ago
  My wife is an optometrist and runs her own independent practice. The field is fascinating but the clinical side doesn't pay the bills. So success means being a good retailer as well.
• TallGuyShort 16y ago
  My wife's an Interior Designer, and I make sure we go to all sorts of expos together. It's been really good for me to learn about something totally different - and I've always appreciated that she asks me to explain what I'm doing, even if it takes me a few tries to make it understandable.
• agentultra 16y ago
  My wife is a homeopathic doctor. I know quite a bit about the practice and have many intense debates with her about it. I take the scientific stance in these debates and we've often talked about the efficacy of homeopathic treatment, regulation, and so forth. I know quite a bit about it now and have been able to reach my own conclusions (which I won't discuss here). I don't think she has as strong a knowledge in programming, but I think that's partly my fault as I don't talk about it much. She know what computer languages I know and that there are quite a few out there. She knows a few of the projects I've worked on. But that's about it. The article provides some good advice. I took up knitting at one point just so I could spend more time with my wife doing things she likes. She's taken up cycling with me and has learned to appreciate graphic novels and some of my favorite poets. If you're going to spend a lifetime together you might as well make it as enjoyable as you can.
  • XFrequentist 16y ago
    You should spread the logical core of your arguments out over several thousand conversations. That should make the arguments much more potent.
• jollyjerry 16y ago
  My girlfriend is a chemical engineer. We both try to talk to one another about what excites us about our work. When she starts talking about nanotech materials, she can't help throwing in a lot of technical jargon that fly over my head. She's always good about thinking of an analogy that I can understand. On the flip side, she rarely has trouble understanding what I do as a web programmer. I think the fact that her work involves all this sci-fi future black magics makes it a little harder to explain. I love having that we have such 2 distinct passions in life. Sure, there's some overlap in engineering, but the subject matters are totally different. As a result of what she does, I get to travel to where her research takes her and meet people with backgrounds completely different from myself. It's freaking awesome. The 2 of us are moving down to Pasadena next month because she's starting at Caltech. It's a bummer to leave the Bay Area, but I'm excited about our new adventures.