3 ms·

> I never liked this quote because it implies being something that you are not, which leads to disingenuous behaviour. I've always liked the quote, but I've al

> I never liked this quote because it implies being something that you are not, which leads to disingenuous behaviour. I've always liked the quote, but I've also interpreted it differently than the author has. Rather than "pretend to be what you are not", I view it more like, "to be what you want, start being what you want and stick to it". That is, start doing the things that it requires. Commit to it - these are the things you do when you're alone as well as when others can see. Let it guide your decisions - you're changing yourself, and that takes a lot of conscious effort at first. I consider that as 'faking it' because it feels unnatural - the new behaviors feel like you're putting on act. As time goes on, this changes. Until one day, you realize that you've integrated that thing you wanted to be into who you actually are. [Or so it has worked out for me in cases that I've done it and stuck with it...]

charlesbai 9y ago
Ah I see, from this angle I can understand - the unnaturalness of new conscious behavioural changes. But overall, that is just discomfort. If you have internalized the values and your actions align with those values, I still do not view it as "faking" it per say. When learning how to swim for the first time, it may feel unnatural. But you are not faking it. You are trying something new, and you have the chance of failure (the source of the discomfort, possibly?) - but you are being true to the task at hand
- khedoros1 9y ago
  Swimming is something you do. "A swimmer" is someone you are. A swimmer swims. If you can't already swim, you learn how to. But when you can swim, you aren't necessarily a swimmer yet. I don't think it's about some particular skill, but more about an identity. Taking on a new identity might involve learning some new skills, but those are just the prerequisites to even successfully "faking it". Put another way, it's more about establishing patterns of behavior. You start off making decisions consciously, and maybe even with difficulty, like "I'm going to get up at 6am, warm up, and swim 10 laps". And "I'm switching my diet to complement my new exercise routine". They'll start out feeling novel, like they're someone else's actions. Then eventually, they'll be your norm. They'll still take effort, but of course you'll make the effort, because "this is just what I do".
- icebraining 9y ago
  Sometimes it feels like faking it, though. Especially during the preparatory rituals; I've felt a bit like Ron Obvious running around on the beach: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ra5h17EbC8 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ra5h17EbC8
- deleted 9y ago
  [deleted]
pseudometa 9y ago
I like it too. If you want to be a runner, act like a runner. To me this means, dress like a runner, eat like a runner, and get out of bed and run every day like a runner. When your are educated about what it takes to do something and you match those behaviors, you will be well on your way to being exactly that... And when you are actually doing those behaviors, there isn't any more pretending.
- internetman55 9y ago
  But that's actually a bad idea in many cases. If a severely out of shape person decides to act like a runner by running everyday, he is very likely to hurt himself relatively quickly or need physical therapy, especially if he is overweight.
traviswingo 9y ago
I think your interpretation of this quote is of a much higher level of logic and intelligence than the majority. I've been around more people than I can count that live by this quote, and all they do is act snobby to rude to people because that's how they think successful people act. The interpretation here is the most dangerous part of the "fake it 'til you make it" mindset.
- delecti 9y ago
  Those people have faked being snobby and rude until it was the truth. "Fake it until you make it" worked for them too, they just set their goal at being a douchebag. I'm with the grandparent comment. "Fake it until you make it" is simply a way to deal with impostor syndrome.
  - deleted 9y ago
    [deleted]
  - gt_ 9y ago
    Unfortunately, it seems like people with imposter syndrome are a far less likely to execute than the ones with the goal of being a douche bag. But, I do appreciate this interpretation as well.
hwillis 9y ago
Its like "learn by doing", except that applies more to actual skills. I guess fake it till you make it does too, but I hear it in reference to more abstract things like dedication and personal improvement.

charlesbai 9y ago

Ah I see, from this angle I can understand - the unnaturalness of new conscious behavioural changes. But overall, that is just discomfort. If you have internalized the values and your actions align with those values, I still do not view it as "faking" it per say. When learning how to swim for the first time, it may feel unnatural. But you are not faking it. You are trying something new, and you have the chance of failure (the source of the discomfort, possibly?) - but you are being true to the task at hand

khedoros1 9y ago
Swimming is something you do. "A swimmer" is someone you are. A swimmer swims. If you can't already swim, you learn how to. But when you can swim, you aren't necessarily a swimmer yet. I don't think it's about some particular skill, but more about an identity. Taking on a new identity might involve learning some new skills, but those are just the prerequisites to even successfully "faking it". Put another way, it's more about establishing patterns of behavior. You start off making decisions consciously, and maybe even with difficulty, like "I'm going to get up at 6am, warm up, and swim 10 laps". And "I'm switching my diet to complement my new exercise routine". They'll start out feeling novel, like they're someone else's actions. Then eventually, they'll be your norm. They'll still take effort, but of course you'll make the effort, because "this is just what I do".
icebraining 9y ago
Sometimes it feels like faking it, though. Especially during the preparatory rituals; I've felt a bit like Ron Obvious running around on the beach: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ra5h17EbC8 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ra5h17EbC8
deleted 9y ago
[deleted]

pseudometa 9y ago

I like it too. If you want to be a runner, act like a runner. To me this means, dress like a runner, eat like a runner, and get out of bed and run every day like a runner. When your are educated about what it takes to do something and you match those behaviors, you will be well on your way to being exactly that... And when you are actually doing those behaviors, there isn't any more pretending.

internetman55 9y ago
But that's actually a bad idea in many cases. If a severely out of shape person decides to act like a runner by running everyday, he is very likely to hurt himself relatively quickly or need physical therapy, especially if he is overweight.

traviswingo 9y ago

I think your interpretation of this quote is of a much higher level of logic and intelligence than the majority. I've been around more people than I can count that live by this quote, and all they do is act snobby to rude to people because that's how they think successful people act. The interpretation here is the most dangerous part of the "fake it 'til you make it" mindset.

delecti 9y ago
Those people have faked being snobby and rude until it was the truth. "Fake it until you make it" worked for them too, they just set their goal at being a douchebag. I'm with the grandparent comment. "Fake it until you make it" is simply a way to deal with impostor syndrome.
- deleted 9y ago
  [deleted]
- gt_ 9y ago
  Unfortunately, it seems like people with imposter syndrome are a far less likely to execute than the ones with the goal of being a douche bag. But, I do appreciate this interpretation as well.

hwillis 9y ago

Its like "learn by doing", except that applies more to actual skills. I guess fake it till you make it does too, but I hear it in reference to more abstract things like dedication and personal improvement.