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> [for men] child-caring time has jumped from 16 minutes a day to 59. I always wanted to spend more time with my own children than my father did with me. It's

> [for men] child-caring time has jumped from 16 minutes a day to 59. I always wanted to spend more time with my own children than my father did with me. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who managed to pull it off.

pbhjpbhj 9y ago
Perhaps ... I've spent 12 hours today with my kids, all but the first hour-90 minutes of their day (excepting school time for the schoolies; about 5 hours in the same space as them). I didn't read the article but is this effect coming from father's doing more time as stay-at-home parents? [FWIW we're dead poor financially at least in part through choice to have lots of contact with our kids.]
- balabaster 9y ago
  After spending 12 hours with my kids, they would spend about 6 of those fighting with each other and me pulling my hair out and wanting to bash their heads together because they can't see their way past their rage for the other's existence. No matter what I try, they just cannot accept that each other have free will to do as they please and that isn't always going to coincide with what they want and they need to learn to be okay with that. 12 hours straight with them is like putting all of us in a torture chamber. They're angels when they're apart, but put them in the same room together for more than 20 minutes and it's like the Blair Witch Project. By the end of the weekend, I find myself longing for Monday for them to go back to school and be separated from one another :D
  - riazrizvi 9y ago
    I grew up with a lot of teasing and fighting. I used that experience to train my own kids to get along. My approach boils down to a zero tolerance policy prohibiting early abusive interactions. The type of ‘joking and playing’ that is really abuse-with-a-smile that inevitably ends in tears. I’m simplifying though. Over the years family friends have repeatedly commented on how well they get along (they are 11 & 13 now) but I just see the byproduct of strict training. And it hasn’t stopped, because as they age and make new friends, they develop new mean spirited habits.

pbhjpbhj 9y ago

Perhaps ... I've spent 12 hours today with my kids, all but the first hour-90 minutes of their day (excepting school time for the schoolies; about 5 hours in the same space as them). I didn't read the article but is this effect coming from father's doing more time as stay-at-home parents? [FWIW we're dead poor financially at least in part through choice to have lots of contact with our kids.]

balabaster 9y ago
After spending 12 hours with my kids, they would spend about 6 of those fighting with each other and me pulling my hair out and wanting to bash their heads together because they can't see their way past their rage for the other's existence. No matter what I try, they just cannot accept that each other have free will to do as they please and that isn't always going to coincide with what they want and they need to learn to be okay with that. 12 hours straight with them is like putting all of us in a torture chamber. They're angels when they're apart, but put them in the same room together for more than 20 minutes and it's like the Blair Witch Project. By the end of the weekend, I find myself longing for Monday for them to go back to school and be separated from one another :D
- riazrizvi 9y ago
  I grew up with a lot of teasing and fighting. I used that experience to train my own kids to get along. My approach boils down to a zero tolerance policy prohibiting early abusive interactions. The type of ‘joking and playing’ that is really abuse-with-a-smile that inevitably ends in tears. I’m simplifying though. Over the years family friends have repeatedly commented on how well they get along (they are 11 & 13 now) but I just see the byproduct of strict training. And it hasn’t stopped, because as they age and make new friends, they develop new mean spirited habits.