4 ms·

Sexual love is a human need as fundamental as food and shelter. In America's individualist society, friendship is a "nice to have." Dating sites get over the

by hapless 16y ago

Sexual love is a human need as fundamental as food and shelter. In America's individualist society, friendship is a "nice to have." Dating sites get over the hump of "oh my god this is creepy" because their users are desperate. It also doesn't matter how well they work: desperate users will pay money for hope, even if their hope is unfounded. Without that driving desperation, I don't know that a friend-making site would ever get traction.

stcredzero 16y ago
I've tried match, harmony, yahoo, friendfinder, and tickle. okcupid actually has compatibility testing & matching that seems to work and that does not suck. No one else I've seen has been able to do that. The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting.
- Alex3917 16y ago
  "The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting." Use crazyblinddate instead of OKCupid. It's down now but hopefully it'll be back online in the next year or so.
- zackattack 16y ago
  "The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting" That's a problem with you, not okcupid.
  - stcredzero 16y ago
    When I go out to events and parties, I get their digits and a date. Perhaps it's my profile.
    - zackattack 16y ago
      The vibe in your profile or your messages, yes.
- bartman 16y ago
  "The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting." I met with a few women that I met on OkCupid, which was usually not preceded by long times of messaging. So far, a high match percentage usually meant we would get along with quite well. I didn't notice a "difference" between 80% and >90% matches in real life though, but it's a good indication to find people you might like. Disclaimer, I'm located in Germany, and most women don't have the "replies very selectively" label here. Edit: spelling
roadnottaken 16y ago
"Sexual love is a human need as fundamental as food and shelter." That's preposterous. Which one could you live without?
- deleted 16y ago
  [deleted]
- codexon 16y ago
  If you are going to nitpick about this: as long as you procreate, you could die the next day due to lack of food and shelter and humanity would continue to evolve in this manner as it has been for thousands of years.
  - philwelch 16y ago
    That wouldn't particularly affect me, would it?
    - codexon 16y ago
      It does, unless you somehow escaped the influence of thousands of years of human evolution...
      - philwelch 16y ago
        Lots of people live long, happy lives without ever once making babies. That's not true of food, water, or shelter. In fact, you could probably live a long happy life without even fucking. But food, water, and shelter are still necessary.
        codexon 16y ago
        Tibetan monks can survive in 40 degree environments just by meditating. http://www.news.harvard.edu/gazette/2002/04.18/09-tummo.html http://www.news.harvard.edu/gazette/2002/04.18/09-tummo.html Does this mean that shelter and clothes are unnecessary? No. Just because a handful of people are able to cope with extreme conditions without X doesn't mean X isn't a fundamental need. Fundamental != you will die without it.
char 16y ago
Dating sites get over the hump of "oh my god this is creepy" because their users are desperate. I think to imply that the general users of dating sites are "desperate" is not only judgmental, but completely inaccurate. Of couse there are SOME desperate users, but they are far from the majority. I tried out Match 4 years ago because I was out of college and just moved to a new city, both factors which make it much harder to meet men I'm compatible with. I thought that by looking at profiles online, I could efficiently choose people to date who had the exact qualities I was looking for. My boyfriend (who I met on Match) used the site for the exact same reasons. I know at least a dozen other couples who are also normal, social people who met the same way. They certainly weren't desperate, nor were most of the people they went on dates with. Because so many non-desperate couples have met through online dating sites, the number of non-desperate users must be a pretty large pool.

by hapless 16y ago

stcredzero 16y ago

I've tried match, harmony, yahoo, friendfinder, and tickle. okcupid actually has compatibility testing & matching that seems to work and that does not suck. No one else I've seen has been able to do that. The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting.

Alex3917 16y ago
"The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting." Use crazyblinddate instead of OKCupid. It's down now but hopefully it'll be back online in the next year or so.
zackattack 16y ago
"The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting" That's a problem with you, not okcupid.
- stcredzero 16y ago
  When I go out to events and parties, I get their digits and a date. Perhaps it's my profile.
  - zackattack 16y ago
    The vibe in your profile or your messages, yes.
bartman 16y ago
"The problem with okcupid, is that it seems that women would rather interact on the site instead of meeting." I met with a few women that I met on OkCupid, which was usually not preceded by long times of messaging. So far, a high match percentage usually meant we would get along with quite well. I didn't notice a "difference" between 80% and >90% matches in real life though, but it's a good indication to find people you might like. Disclaimer, I'm located in Germany, and most women don't have the "replies very selectively" label here. Edit: spelling

roadnottaken 16y ago

"Sexual love is a human need as fundamental as food and shelter." That's preposterous. Which one could you live without?

deleted 16y ago
[deleted]
codexon 16y ago
If you are going to nitpick about this: as long as you procreate, you could die the next day due to lack of food and shelter and humanity would continue to evolve in this manner as it has been for thousands of years.
- philwelch 16y ago
  That wouldn't particularly affect me, would it?
  - codexon 16y ago
    It does, unless you somehow escaped the influence of thousands of years of human evolution...
    - philwelch 16y ago
      Lots of people live long, happy lives without ever once making babies. That's not true of food, water, or shelter. In fact, you could probably live a long happy life without even fucking. But food, water, and shelter are still necessary.
      - codexon 16y ago
        Tibetan monks can survive in 40 degree environments just by meditating. http://www.news.harvard.edu/gazette/2002/04.18/09-tummo.html http://www.news.harvard.edu/gazette/2002/04.18/09-tummo.html Does this mean that shelter and clothes are unnecessary? No. Just because a handful of people are able to cope with extreme conditions without X doesn't mean X isn't a fundamental need. Fundamental != you will die without it.

char 16y ago

Dating sites get over the hump of "oh my god this is creepy" because their users are desperate. I think to imply that the general users of dating sites are "desperate" is not only judgmental, but completely inaccurate. Of couse there are SOME desperate users, but they are far from the majority. I tried out Match 4 years ago because I was out of college and just moved to a new city, both factors which make it much harder to meet men I'm compatible with. I thought that by looking at profiles online, I could efficiently choose people to date who had the exact qualities I was looking for. My boyfriend (who I met on Match) used the site for the exact same reasons. I know at least a dozen other couples who are also normal, social people who met the same way. They certainly weren't desperate, nor were most of the people they went on dates with. Because so many non-desperate couples have met through online dating sites, the number of non-desperate users must be a pretty large pool.