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> Even if it’s just at the grocery store. Even if it’s just with the homeless guy down the road. I think you are missing the point. Loneliness is not solved by

by goshx 9y ago

> Even if it’s just at the grocery store. Even if it’s just with the homeless guy down the road. I think you are missing the point. Loneliness is not solved by simply being around people. I’ve been living in the US for 5 years now and the amount of people I can call friends here is very small, despite all the attempts at grocery stores, bars, meetups and even homeless folks. Society doesn’t seem to be open to take in someone that apparently doesn’t fit certain criteria they impose. And unless you are willing to do exactly as other people do, you’re going to have a hard time. People may disagree, this is just my personal experience.

icantdrive55 9y ago
I've lived in the Bay Area most of my life. I have had a hard time finding true friends. I know it's partially my fault. I also believe it's the environment. I live in a wealth area. I'm not wealthy, by any means. People seem to have everything here, except friends. If they are lucky, they have a wife, or a husband they can tolerate. I think because the cost of living is so great, people have their defenses up. Kinda like, "What do you want from me?" My best friend died a few years ago. He was a master at friendship. He was also manic, but he knew the secret to friendship. He would just call people. I met him at work, and within a few weeks he would call me daily. At first, I tried to end the conversations quick, but finally gave up. We were best friends for years. We went into businesses together. I could trust him with my life. I don't have it in me to be so persistent though. I did try to keep friends with my exes, but there was always that day, where they I could tell they wanted more, or nothing. When I was younger, I really thought men and women could be friends, but I don't think it works in the long run, especially after an intimate relationship. If I had a do over, I would have listened to, "We don't want to ruin what we have right now?". I can add this. Money can't buy good friends. It might be the only huge downside to making it financially. My neighbors are very lonely. Marin County might be the loneliest place on earth. (Yes--I outed my county. Too many people move expecting their lives to be great. And to those that have a different perspective--share it. I'm at a loss.)
jesseendahl 9y ago
@icantdrive55 - Many of your comments (including the one on this thread) are "dead" (hidden) for some reason. I'm not sure why that's the case, and since I didn't see anything wrong with your comments, I figured you should know.
- Neliquat 9y ago
  Thanks, mine seem to come and go. Not sure why.

by goshx 9y ago

icantdrive55 9y ago

I've lived in the Bay Area most of my life. I have had a hard time finding true friends. I know it's partially my fault. I also believe it's the environment. I live in a wealth area. I'm not wealthy, by any means. People seem to have everything here, except friends. If they are lucky, they have a wife, or a husband they can tolerate. I think because the cost of living is so great, people have their defenses up. Kinda like, "What do you want from me?" My best friend died a few years ago. He was a master at friendship. He was also manic, but he knew the secret to friendship. He would just call people. I met him at work, and within a few weeks he would call me daily. At first, I tried to end the conversations quick, but finally gave up. We were best friends for years. We went into businesses together. I could trust him with my life. I don't have it in me to be so persistent though. I did try to keep friends with my exes, but there was always that day, where they I could tell they wanted more, or nothing. When I was younger, I really thought men and women could be friends, but I don't think it works in the long run, especially after an intimate relationship. If I had a do over, I would have listened to, "We don't want to ruin what we have right now?". I can add this. Money can't buy good friends. It might be the only huge downside to making it financially. My neighbors are very lonely. Marin County might be the loneliest place on earth. (Yes--I outed my county. Too many people move expecting their lives to be great. And to those that have a different perspective--share it. I'm at a loss.)

jesseendahl 9y ago

@icantdrive55 - Many of your comments (including the one on this thread) are "dead" (hidden) for some reason. I'm not sure why that's the case, and since I didn't see anything wrong with your comments, I figured you should know.

Neliquat 9y ago
Thanks, mine seem to come and go. Not sure why.