5 ms·

My takeaway from this is that frequent 1 to 1s are a good idea for every single employee, from the day you start to the day you leave the company. You need to

My takeaway from this is that frequent 1 to 1s are a good idea for every single employee, from the day you start to the day you leave the company. You need to use them for positive feedback as well as negative, and general chats about progress and ideas.

tigershark 9y ago
They are utterly and completely useless. You should speak with your boss continuously, regardless of the 1 on 1s. Maybe it's a coincidence but with all the worst bosses that I had we had 1 on 1s. It's just a way to hide their incompetence in my opinion.
- Scarblac 9y ago
  What is the difference between a one on one and speaking with your boss? I use them as synonyms.
  - rocqua 9y ago
    The presence of others. A 1 on 1 is private, but you can speak with your boss when others are present.
  - sverhagen 9y ago
    Managers need to be available when things happen. I mean, they have other meetings, but during the day they should be able to give or receive "immediate" feedback; don't wait until the scheduled weekly (if you're that lucky) one-on-ones. However, if everybody is busy, and there's no immediate need to walk into each other's (virtual) office, it's good to have the scheduled interactions, to make sure you're still aligned as well as still pleasantly interacting as humans. (If the latter wasn't the case in the first place, maybe... wrong job.)
    - rorykoehler 9y ago
      1 on 1s are not for feedback on day to day stuff. They are supposed to cover the more meta aspects not related directly to delivering on a daily basis. If your boss is using 1 on 1s to cover operational stuff they're wasting the opportunity to help improve the team wellbeing and progress.
      - sverhagen 9y ago
        I don't think we really had a disagreement, here. Just keep in mind that one-on-ones vastly differ between companies and managers, among other things in frequency.
    - Scarblac 9y ago
      In my situation, my boss is one of the 10 other people in the same office (when he isn't in meetings). All of us ask each other quick questions but try not to hold longer discussions there, because it disturbs everybody else. So more than that becomes a "one on one" in the discussion room. Nothing scheduled.
- blowski 9y ago
  The problem with being continuously available is that it leads to "squeakiest wheel" syndrome where the loudest complainers get all the attention. Meanwhile, the quietly productive people quit because their frustrations aren't heard.
- tdb7893 9y ago
  In my experience 1 on 1s are nice because it allows me and my boss to speak in private consistently. When we are both in cubicles it's hard for me to have candid conversations if I know everyone is listening. It probably depends on the person but I have always really liked one on one meetings.
  - jschwartzi 9y ago
    It also establishes a pattern so that other employees don't automatically assume that seeing you and the boss in a meeting room means that you're having a candid conversation.
- tdb7893 9y ago
  In my experience 1 on 1s are nice because it allows me and my boss to speak in private consistently. When we are both in cubicles it's hard for me to have candid conversations if I know everyone is listening. It probably depends on the person but I have always really liked one on one meetings.
- nerdponx 9y ago
  Or unwillingness to hire enough headcount due to being "lean".
danieltillett 9y ago
As a boss the problem is employees take up so much time. Each employee really needs at least 30 minutes of your attention per day averaged over the month (mostly just chit chat, but also mentoring and feedback) [1]. Once you have more than a couple of people to manage there goes your whole day. 1. Yes some people are fine with less, but this is the average amount of time people need. Putting in less just results in a build up of management debt that will come back and bite you in the butt.
- madeofpalk 9y ago
  ...isnt managing and helping out your employees like half your job?
  - danieltillett 9y ago
    It sure is (actually a full time job), but I also have another job worth of non-management activities on top of this. At least I enjoy it all :)
- foodie_ 9y ago
  I believe it was Andy Grove who suggest no more than 6-8 direct reports for this reason.
  - seanmcdirmid 9y ago
    6-8 sounds like too many. Anyways, in addition to probably being unfit for people management, it sounds like it would take away all my coding time.
    - blowski 9y ago
      Personally, I think that mixing management with programming leads to bad results.
    - halbritt 9y ago
      The latter statement proves the former. A good manager prioritizes management over work that an individual contributor might do. If that doesn't suit a person, they're likely not fit for management. I've seen many managers fail for this reason.
eeZah7Ux 9y ago
1:1s are far from a solution. Many "competitive" companies use this asymmetrical conversations behind closed doors to push employees to overpromise and therefore under-deliver. It's also very easy to manipulate employees into feeling guilty or develop impostor syndrome.
- blowski 9y ago
  That's like saying you shouldn't have elections because totalitarian dictators can abuse them. If your boss's plan is to make you feel bad, it doesn't matter what management technique they use.
deleted 9y ago
[deleted]

tigershark 9y ago

They are utterly and completely useless. You should speak with your boss continuously, regardless of the 1 on 1s. Maybe it's a coincidence but with all the worst bosses that I had we had 1 on 1s. It's just a way to hide their incompetence in my opinion.

Scarblac 9y ago
What is the difference between a one on one and speaking with your boss? I use them as synonyms.
- rocqua 9y ago
  The presence of others. A 1 on 1 is private, but you can speak with your boss when others are present.
- sverhagen 9y ago
  Managers need to be available when things happen. I mean, they have other meetings, but during the day they should be able to give or receive "immediate" feedback; don't wait until the scheduled weekly (if you're that lucky) one-on-ones. However, if everybody is busy, and there's no immediate need to walk into each other's (virtual) office, it's good to have the scheduled interactions, to make sure you're still aligned as well as still pleasantly interacting as humans. (If the latter wasn't the case in the first place, maybe... wrong job.)
  - rorykoehler 9y ago
    1 on 1s are not for feedback on day to day stuff. They are supposed to cover the more meta aspects not related directly to delivering on a daily basis. If your boss is using 1 on 1s to cover operational stuff they're wasting the opportunity to help improve the team wellbeing and progress.
    - sverhagen 9y ago
      I don't think we really had a disagreement, here. Just keep in mind that one-on-ones vastly differ between companies and managers, among other things in frequency.
  - Scarblac 9y ago
    In my situation, my boss is one of the 10 other people in the same office (when he isn't in meetings). All of us ask each other quick questions but try not to hold longer discussions there, because it disturbs everybody else. So more than that becomes a "one on one" in the discussion room. Nothing scheduled.
blowski 9y ago
The problem with being continuously available is that it leads to "squeakiest wheel" syndrome where the loudest complainers get all the attention. Meanwhile, the quietly productive people quit because their frustrations aren't heard.
tdb7893 9y ago
In my experience 1 on 1s are nice because it allows me and my boss to speak in private consistently. When we are both in cubicles it's hard for me to have candid conversations if I know everyone is listening. It probably depends on the person but I have always really liked one on one meetings.
- jschwartzi 9y ago
  It also establishes a pattern so that other employees don't automatically assume that seeing you and the boss in a meeting room means that you're having a candid conversation.
tdb7893 9y ago
In my experience 1 on 1s are nice because it allows me and my boss to speak in private consistently. When we are both in cubicles it's hard for me to have candid conversations if I know everyone is listening. It probably depends on the person but I have always really liked one on one meetings.
nerdponx 9y ago
Or unwillingness to hire enough headcount due to being "lean".

danieltillett 9y ago

As a boss the problem is employees take up so much time. Each employee really needs at least 30 minutes of your attention per day averaged over the month (mostly just chit chat, but also mentoring and feedback) [1]. Once you have more than a couple of people to manage there goes your whole day. 1. Yes some people are fine with less, but this is the average amount of time people need. Putting in less just results in a build up of management debt that will come back and bite you in the butt.

madeofpalk 9y ago
...isnt managing and helping out your employees like half your job?
- danieltillett 9y ago
  It sure is (actually a full time job), but I also have another job worth of non-management activities on top of this. At least I enjoy it all :)
foodie_ 9y ago
I believe it was Andy Grove who suggest no more than 6-8 direct reports for this reason.
- seanmcdirmid 9y ago
  6-8 sounds like too many. Anyways, in addition to probably being unfit for people management, it sounds like it would take away all my coding time.
  - blowski 9y ago
    Personally, I think that mixing management with programming leads to bad results.
  - halbritt 9y ago
    The latter statement proves the former. A good manager prioritizes management over work that an individual contributor might do. If that doesn't suit a person, they're likely not fit for management. I've seen many managers fail for this reason.

eeZah7Ux 9y ago

1:1s are far from a solution. Many "competitive" companies use this asymmetrical conversations behind closed doors to push employees to overpromise and therefore under-deliver. It's also very easy to manipulate employees into feeling guilty or develop impostor syndrome.

blowski 9y ago
That's like saying you shouldn't have elections because totalitarian dictators can abuse them. If your boss's plan is to make you feel bad, it doesn't matter what management technique they use.

deleted 9y ago

[deleted]