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I have been living as a Hikikomori for the last eight years. Every two years I leave my home for a few hours, but I spend the rest of the time in front of my co

I have been living as a Hikikomori for the last eight years. Every two years I leave my home for a few hours, but I spend the rest of the time in front of my computers. I don't have any friends in real life or online and the only people I interact with are my parents. Every meal is prepared for me so the only thing I have to do is my laundry once a month. I often think about how fast time flies when living this lifestyle. A year feels like a month to me. The sad part is that I have missed out on most things a normal person experiences. The twenties for most people is about experiences, creating lifelong memories, parties and fun. It feels like my twenties was over in the blink of an eye and left a book with empty pages. My youth has run into the sand.

nnfy 9y ago
The sooner you make a change, the fewer of your life's pages will be blank. Think more of the future and less of the past. I know how it feels to think that you missed out on years of your young life, but you soon forget when you fill your present with positive experiences.
zeroer 9y ago
What do you leave your house for for a few hours every two years?
- EuroHikikomori 9y ago
  The hospital for a check-up.
Red_Tarsius 9y ago
I really appreciate you sharing your experience. What made you decide to be hikikomori? It's never too late. Tell your parents that you want to change life. Turn their support into something positive. Go out of your house to buy pizza, ice cream, whatever. Get your body moving, the mind will follow. Try to stay in your room without digital devices... for one week. It will clear your thoughts and force you to deal with reality. You will feel bad, at first. But it's going to get better. It's the beginning of your new life. Isn't it exciting? A whole new journey lies ahead of you! Take a long walk in the countryside, far from other people. Nature is truly amazing and hiking scratches that same itch of sensory overload (Internet and gaming). Everyone makes mistakes. But you should not be defined by them. You're living a defeatist narrative. Get out of that narrative. Forget your biases and expectations. Don't let other people define you. If you want to keep in touch, post your contact info.
- EuroHikikomori 9y ago
  I wouldn't say it was an active choice, I didn't even known about hikikomori until very recently, but the description fits my lifestyle. I went to trade school and graduated as a network technician/systems administrator, but I never got a job and then time just went on and suddenly I hadn't left my home for years. I wrote in my first post, I'm sad I missed out on so many things in my youth, but sometimes I think the reason why I'm sad is because I have been conditioned by social conventions to believe that I should be. If I had been going to parties in my twenties, according to social conventions, I wouldn't have missed out and should be happy, but what if I should be true to myself? I have actually never really enjoyed other peoples company and had I been invited to parties, there is a great chance that I would just stand awkwardly in the corner waiting to go home. I do get extreme enjoyment from programming and doing other computer stuff alone, and I'm able to do it 24/7. Maybe I actually have the most fulfilled life that I could ever have, following my personal preferences, but social conventions are preventing me to acknowledge it? It's a double-edged sword.
  - 3131s 9y ago
    Your post is really fascinating to me. I do think it's possible to be happy living unconventionally. My life is also unconventional, though in a different way. Do you socialize online a lot? Do you work freelance at all or are you financially supported? How do you usually pass the time other than programming? What do your parents think about it?
    - EuroHikikomori 9y ago
      I don't socialize online at all as it would quickly feel like a burden to me. I don't work freelance or have any income at all, but I'm very low maintenance as I don't eat much and don't like material possessions. All I own is a few computers and a toothbrush, but I don't have any debt either. I think it would be impossible to make my life more minimalistic than it is now. Once a month I do my laundry and all other time is spent at the computers. I work on a project for some months, delete it after completion and start over with a new project. I think my parents has gotten ‎acclimated to it as the change was gradually over a long time and not from one day to another.
nradov 9y ago
Why do your parents put up with this?
synicalx 9y ago
If it's any consolation, parties in your 20's tend to get old pretty quick - especially if you've been doing it since your... teenies? I'd much rather sit at home with the missus and my cat and make myself some nice cocktails rather than go back into a big house party, or a nightclub and I'm only 24! A lot of my friends are in the same boat - no one parties any more, we all just sort of "got over" it.
pitay 9y ago
My apologies for this unsolicited opinion, but have you considered getting weights if you haven't got them already? If you get some weights you can do some extra exercise in your room, just learn how to use the weights safely. I believe your parents would be more than happy to get you them. It would be an improvement in itself and may possibly lead to better things. Just my opinion though.
deleted 9y ago
[deleted]

nnfy 9y ago

The sooner you make a change, the fewer of your life's pages will be blank. Think more of the future and less of the past. I know how it feels to think that you missed out on years of your young life, but you soon forget when you fill your present with positive experiences.

zeroer 9y ago

What do you leave your house for for a few hours every two years?

EuroHikikomori 9y ago
The hospital for a check-up.

Red_Tarsius 9y ago

I really appreciate you sharing your experience. What made you decide to be hikikomori? It's never too late. Tell your parents that you want to change life. Turn their support into something positive. Go out of your house to buy pizza, ice cream, whatever. Get your body moving, the mind will follow. Try to stay in your room without digital devices... for one week. It will clear your thoughts and force you to deal with reality. You will feel bad, at first. But it's going to get better. It's the beginning of your new life. Isn't it exciting? A whole new journey lies ahead of you! Take a long walk in the countryside, far from other people. Nature is truly amazing and hiking scratches that same itch of sensory overload (Internet and gaming). Everyone makes mistakes. But you should not be defined by them. You're living a defeatist narrative. Get out of that narrative. Forget your biases and expectations. Don't let other people define you. If you want to keep in touch, post your contact info.

EuroHikikomori 9y ago
I wouldn't say it was an active choice, I didn't even known about hikikomori until very recently, but the description fits my lifestyle. I went to trade school and graduated as a network technician/systems administrator, but I never got a job and then time just went on and suddenly I hadn't left my home for years. I wrote in my first post, I'm sad I missed out on so many things in my youth, but sometimes I think the reason why I'm sad is because I have been conditioned by social conventions to believe that I should be. If I had been going to parties in my twenties, according to social conventions, I wouldn't have missed out and should be happy, but what if I should be true to myself? I have actually never really enjoyed other peoples company and had I been invited to parties, there is a great chance that I would just stand awkwardly in the corner waiting to go home. I do get extreme enjoyment from programming and doing other computer stuff alone, and I'm able to do it 24/7. Maybe I actually have the most fulfilled life that I could ever have, following my personal preferences, but social conventions are preventing me to acknowledge it? It's a double-edged sword.
- 3131s 9y ago
  Your post is really fascinating to me. I do think it's possible to be happy living unconventionally. My life is also unconventional, though in a different way. Do you socialize online a lot? Do you work freelance at all or are you financially supported? How do you usually pass the time other than programming? What do your parents think about it?
  - EuroHikikomori 9y ago
    I don't socialize online at all as it would quickly feel like a burden to me. I don't work freelance or have any income at all, but I'm very low maintenance as I don't eat much and don't like material possessions. All I own is a few computers and a toothbrush, but I don't have any debt either. I think it would be impossible to make my life more minimalistic than it is now. Once a month I do my laundry and all other time is spent at the computers. I work on a project for some months, delete it after completion and start over with a new project. I think my parents has gotten ‎acclimated to it as the change was gradually over a long time and not from one day to another.

nradov 9y ago

Why do your parents put up with this?

synicalx 9y ago

If it's any consolation, parties in your 20's tend to get old pretty quick - especially if you've been doing it since your... teenies? I'd much rather sit at home with the missus and my cat and make myself some nice cocktails rather than go back into a big house party, or a nightclub and I'm only 24! A lot of my friends are in the same boat - no one parties any more, we all just sort of "got over" it.

pitay 9y ago

My apologies for this unsolicited opinion, but have you considered getting weights if you haven't got them already? If you get some weights you can do some extra exercise in your room, just learn how to use the weights safely. I believe your parents would be more than happy to get you them. It would be an improvement in itself and may possibly lead to better things. Just my opinion though.

deleted 9y ago

[deleted]