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And that attitude gets you a kid who has missed significant cultural influences, can't share the excitement over it with other kids and who won't be able to sha

And that attitude gets you a kid who has missed significant cultural influences, can't share the excitement over it with other kids and who won't be able to share the nostalgia for it with friends of similar age. Yes, I'm salty that I never was allowed to have a console or watch most popular TV shows because they're too banal/grapic/sexualized/adult. It sucks only being able to experience those things at friends' houses, because you'll be terrible at it if it's games and not know the lore if it's shows, so you still can't really share the experience. It sucks to be an outsider as a kid and I wish my parents had not made me that. Its one of the few things I really regret.

chii 9y ago
I think parents should set an allowance, rather then a straight no. kid wants a lolly from the checkout? subtract from the allowance, and make sure the kid knows the remaining. don't restrict what the allowance can be used for, but strictly police the amount per month. they have to learn from early on, this useful skill of trade off and long term planning. it's never too late to start.
- josephg 9y ago
  Thats doubly clever, because it makes the child complicit in not getting the candy. "Well, you spent all your money yesterday" is a much better reason than "I've decided you won't have that". Children don't yet have the skills to question the system their choices are embedded inside. (That comes waaaay later - arguably not until your 20s.)
- Lazare 9y ago
  Letting kids waste their allowances is an incredibly useful tactic. My parents gave me an allowance, then carefully audited every purchase and refused to let me spend it on things they didn't think were good value. Which is 1) a waste of their time 2) frustrating for the kid and 3) utterly defeats the purpose, because I never got to learn restraint or budgeting, and it bit me on the ass when I was in my early 20s.

chii 9y ago

I think parents should set an allowance, rather then a straight no. kid wants a lolly from the checkout? subtract from the allowance, and make sure the kid knows the remaining. don't restrict what the allowance can be used for, but strictly police the amount per month. they have to learn from early on, this useful skill of trade off and long term planning. it's never too late to start.

josephg 9y ago
Thats doubly clever, because it makes the child complicit in not getting the candy. "Well, you spent all your money yesterday" is a much better reason than "I've decided you won't have that". Children don't yet have the skills to question the system their choices are embedded inside. (That comes waaaay later - arguably not until your 20s.)
Lazare 9y ago
Letting kids waste their allowances is an incredibly useful tactic. My parents gave me an allowance, then carefully audited every purchase and refused to let me spend it on things they didn't think were good value. Which is 1) a waste of their time 2) frustrating for the kid and 3) utterly defeats the purpose, because I never got to learn restraint or budgeting, and it bit me on the ass when I was in my early 20s.