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The Age of Absurdity: Why Modern Life Makes It Hard to Be Happy (2010)
- squozzer 10y agoAlso check out The Screwtape Letters. Lots of commentary about the tedium of pleasure-seeking.
- wiremine 10y agoOne of Lewis' best works. "Prosperity knits a man to the world. He feels that he is finding his place in it, while really it is finding its place in him."
- eli_gottlieb 10y agoForgive my heresy, but this book sounds like Yet Another Stoicism Book. Oh, you can be satisfied with life by never wanting anything! What an insight? For once I'd like someone to quote a famous philosopher like, since he was mentioned, Marx, not to say we should want nothing, but instead to point out that we have very real needs which must be met before we can want nothing. Preach to me of Stoicism when you've housed all the homeless and fed all the hungry!
- JoeAltmaier 10y agoMaybe this article isn't aimed at the hungry poor.
- stryan 10y agoI haven't read the book, but it seems to me as if you're making this judgement based solely on the line "an idea as compelling to the Greek and Roman stoics" and ignoring the fact that it's immediately followed up by "as to Sartre and Camus". Ignoring what you said about Stoicism (which,quite frankly, is wrong; it's a very humanistic and community oriented philosophy and almost all virtue-based philosophies are action oriented) the idea of detachment is common to many philosophies and religions including Buddhism, Absurdism, Nihilism (IMHO), various monastic and mystic groups (i.e. The Church Fathers and Sufism), and good old fashioned Platonism. Stocism was probably just mentioned since it A) does incorporate detachment to some degree and B) is one of if not the most well known of the Greco-Roman philosophical schools.
- beachstartup 10y agowell, there is this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_hierarchy_of_needs https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_hierarchy_of_needs but you'll probably dismiss it as new-agey handwavey woo woo crap about self-actualization. all this existential stuff is kind of ridiculous, just like life, so you kind of just have to take it at face value.
- projektir 10y agoWell, Maslov's hierarchy is not exactly a proven concept. I think it's far too simplistic, for one.
- antisthenes 10y agoMaslow's hierarchy is way too generalized to be of any use. I would argue that it's not really a pyramid hierarchy, but more of a pool from which happiness and satisfaction is drawn, where some segments can compensate for others. The only indispensable one is the physiological one. Even Maslow himself states: >Maslow states that while he originally thought the needs of humans had strict guidelines, the "hierarchies are interrelated rather than sharply separated".[5] This means that esteem and the subsequent levels are not strictly separated; instead, the levels are closely related. Like all psychology of the mid 20th century (its essential infancy), it was merely an attempt to categorize some societal patterns without any actual data or studies, but from empirical observations of an extremely narrow view of a westernized society.
- NoGravitas 10y agoThe beginning and root of all good is the pleasure of the stomach; even wisdom and culture must be referred to this. -- Epicurus A minimum of comfort is necessary for the practice of virtue. -- Patrice Lumumba
- wotryadoin 10y agoYou are not allowed to talk about marx, ever, this is the internet.
- bbctol 10y agoWhat is it about "modern" life that makes us less inclined to Stoicism, though? This smells of noble savagery--I'm doubtful anyone who refers to ritual body mutilation as preferable to playing Everquest has been mutilated.
- bm1362 10y agoI played EverQuest when I was 9 and thoroughly enjoyed the mysticism and grandeur of it -- you might as well have placed me in a desert.
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- throwanem 10y ago> I'm doubtful anyone who refers to ritual body mutilation as preferable to playing Everquest has been mutilated. "You might be surprised," he said, and was himself surprised when people took it as a joke.
- sakopov 10y agoJason Silva put it quite nicely in one of his videos [1]: > The very same quality that make us these majestic creatures that soar above the heavens and transcend their boundaries has made us perpetually dissatisfied, neurotic beings living in urban centers drowning in consumption in an over-capitalist bloated system that can no longer satiate us always wanting something else until we're overwhelmed and overweight and immobilized by how spoiled we've become and yet we enjoy very little of it. [1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzAFCU4RCnM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzAFCU4RCnM
- merpnderp 10y agoI once saw a bumper sticker that said "You will die. I will die a marine." I'm guessing the modern version of being drug out to the desert for "ritual body mutilation" had given that person a sense of pride and happiness at his service. Certainly something to be feel better about than hours spent on Everquest.
- pavlov 10y agoYes, it's a tribal sense of purpose. An associated phenomenon is Laconophilia, the admiration of Spartan values: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laconophilia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laconophilia In the Enlightenment era, Jean-Jacques Rousseau was a famous advocate of Spartan values over the "Athenian" cultured urbanism that is essentially the foundation of modern Western life.
- mesozoic 10y agoYou will die. I will die a level 90 Warlock.
- bm1362 10y agoBeing part of a strong community seems to be the cure for existentialism.
- projektir 10y agoThis may very much be the source of the happiness the author is lamenting about, though. Status is always there, and it never went away, and I'd posit that it is is something capable of making a person feel miserable even if everything else in their life is great. If your happiness is strongly tied to status, that is problematic, since status is almost necessarily zero-sum. For it to be significant that one is a Marine, Marines must be rare, and the comparison point would need to be some non-Marine. And, in the past, communities were smaller, you weren't comparing yourself to billions of people. If status is zero-sum or near-zero-sum, and when you can no longer stand out just by contributing to your community as the guy who makes tables or something, because there are quite a few people making better tables than you, so what happens to your status?
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- xyzzy4 10y agoYou can be equally happy in any culture. You don't need anything external to be happy. It's just a mentality.
- djtriptych 10y agoI had this realization when considering the happiest people on earth (scandinavians) also have pretty much the most disgusting food (imo). But my culture's food (soul food) makes me happy. This led to the realization that you can change what makes you happy. Though it's very difficult to do that work in today's climate, and impossible over short time scales. A practice like transcendental meditation or yoga is essential in my opinion. Disappointing that well-tested multigenerational wisdom like this is often downvoted on HN =/ disclaimer: currently reading Autobiography of a Yogi.
- FussyZeus 10y agoThis. Choosing to be happy is extremely difficult (and is fought hard by any number of other factors, like your diet, your lifestyle, your current economic status, etc.) but the simple fact is being happy is a choice. Hardly ever an easy choice but a choice nonetheless.
- projektir 10y agoThere's a point in that where the word "choice" seems rather meaningless. A choice is supposed to be a simple thing, it's merely a decision, not an end goal that takes an inordinate amount of energy. At that point, that's a goal, that's a direction, etc., but it's not exactly a choice since the level of difficulty necessarily implies that you are quite likely to fail, which also means most people will fail. If anything, your statement would imply that happiness is absolutely not a choice and something most people will never achieve, just like people can't simply "choose" to become an Olympic athlete or the President. The definition has been pulled too far from its original purpose.
- djtriptych 10y agoI think most practicing yogis, for instance, would argue that yoga is for everyone. In fact, it can be thought of as humanity's best-tested method for self-derived happiness, as filtered through generations of practice and refinement. While you can't choose to be able to do any particular posture or position, you _can_ choose to be happier than you are now...
- TempleOSV409 10y agoI have a space alien. God says... final's unforeseeable maximization's countermanded odes lupus noblewoman broadness legitimize skiing's indents golly overhauling avenues river SALT's taker Prince's economic Pat helplessly numismatist's Sicilian's Equuleus turquoise schematic's liquidating darn corrosion's demagoguery's contortionist's orthogonality I made God's third temple. I'm in a prison. God always wins in the end. Suffering is the only way to get to heaven. Highs and lows balance. God says... florin's hackneyed shipyard particulars née Alissa's leitmotif's speedy amperes reciprocity overstepping misread Geffen's rearing troopships viciousness's retirement's Baal's bleaker spendthrifts niftier medalist's supplant eluding rooking rigorous conspires mottling jest Marines Meyerbeer lilies
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- WhitneyLand 10y agoIs the author mostly describing this? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hedonic_treadmill https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hedonic_treadmill
- ErikAugust 10y agoJust read "Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius, and "The Myth of Sisyphus" by Albert Camus. This article hints at both - and they were my biggest eye-openers on the question of how* to live.
- reifnir 10y agoSame here. Meditations is fantastic, though for a more complete look into Stoicism, I can't recommend A Guide to the Good Life (The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy) by William B Irvine enough!
- stryan 10y agoI too recommend "A Guide to the Good Life" but saying its a "more complete look into Stoicism" seems a little exagerating. Irvine covers a lot of of the major topics and offers a many excellent ways of integrating them into modern life but underplays one of the most important aspects of Stoicism: living a virtuous lifestyle. He instead heavily plays up the tranquility aspects which I find a bit disingenuous. He also neglects many of the metaphysical aspects of Stoicism which, even if you don't believe/agree with them (I certainly don't), makes it more difficult to understand the background of a lot of Stoic teachings and practices. It's best to take Irvine's book as a guide to his own modern philosophy heavily based off Stoicism. Take that as you will, but I would recommend Stoicism and the Art of Happiness and some of the original Stoic classics; Enchiridion by Epictetus (it's short and very direct) and Seneca the Youngers Letters.
- ErikAugust 10y agoIrvine's book is good. Definitely a nice companion to reading Stoic works.
- Pamar 10y agoI mantain a small page devoted to stoicism resources. http://pa-mar.net/Main/Lifestyle/Stoicism.html http://pa-mar.net/Main/Lifestyle/Stoicism.html
- rogerdpack 10y agoSo...has your life been "happy/good" since reading these books? What's the end result? How has it changed? Cheers!
- karma_vaccum123 10y agoThere is an entire industry dedicated to making you feel inadequate and unhappy: advertising. We are bombarded with messages telling us we are not good enough as we are, but certain products and services can make it so. Don't worry though, it will all be better once you sit down with your Bay Area Mercedes Benz dealer to talk about financing options on the fantastic new S series featuring blah blah blah.
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- Domenic_S 10y agoRight. To put a finer point on it, the insidious part is that advertising teaches us not what to want, but how to want. It doesn't say "a Mercedes makes you worth something", it says "only the things you buy can [make you valuable|entertain you|satisfy you|make life worth living]", which ingrains certain behaviors. It's like the Dark Side version of the "...teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea" quote. Edit: and it really goes even deeper than that, teaching us that being constantly entertained or totally satisfied is the state of being everyone else is in (so why aren't you?) --> only buying things can get you there --> here, buy this.
- aianus 10y agoUntil it becomes socially acceptable to bring a tax return and 401k statement on a first date, nice clothes and a nice car are going to remain the only way to demonstrate success to a stranger.
- evo_9 10y agoIn recent years I've gotten into the Greek philosophy of Stoicism and find it a great mental tool even in our modern times. I'm partial to the book A Guide to the Good Life by William Irvine. Summary: http://becomingeden.com/summary-of-a-guide-to-the-good-life/ http://becomingeden.com/summary-of-a-guide-to-the-good-life/
- fsiefken 10y agoThank you for this practical summary, I had the book but didn't read it yet.
- projektir 10y agoThis article doesn't do the work. It does not provide good arguments, nor does it provide evidence. It simply repeats some fairly popular platitudes and jabs in hopes that it will make people agree and go buy the book. But nothing is really being properly explored in the article and I would not give it any credit. The book is another matter but that will need to be analyzed separately.
- onetwotree 10y agoIt's just a book review.
- orky56 10y agoWe are moving away from the satisfaction in the action to glamorizing all the other parts such as the result, or even worse the ability to avoid the action altogether. Our values are more aligned with pride and the communal recognition of success rather than the individual notion that you put your full effort and must live with the consequences. On a separate note, we are seeing a gradual disappearance of the middle class resulting in desperate attempts to rise in status whether superficially or explicitly. In either case, we are losing some self-worth and putting our happiness in the hands of society and rules we don't control.
- mixmastamyk 10y agoAround the turn of the century cough I became aware of the concept of "affluenza" (a portmanteau of affluence and influenza), watched a PBS show on the topic, and read the book "Your Money or Your Life," which changed my life. Before that time I was a materialistic kid, gathering as much stuff as I could. The TL;DR to these is that once you get enough anything more produces rapidly diminishing returns in the happiness department: - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Affluenza https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Affluenza - http://www.pbs.org/kcts/affluenza/show/joe.html http://www.pbs.org/kcts/affluenza/show/joe.html - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_hierarchy_of_needs https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_hierarchy_of_needs The movie Fight Club also came out around this time with a similar message and was the "knockout punch" to my consumerism, haha. Not long after this I'd sold most of what I owned, quit my job, and took a trip around the world. Have been much happier ever since, with new expectations and goals. Another thing I learned on that trip, I did not miss TV one minute while I was gone, and found a lot of the garbage (consumerism, superstition, Britney news, and petty politics) in my mind had cleared. The main purpose of TV news and advertising is to drive fear and desire, which I now liken to a cancer, but one that can be beat. Yes, we have netflix and itunes because there are some great shows, right? But commercials and mainstream news sources---fuck no---life is much better without them.
- rogerdpack 10y agoSo would you say reading the book affected you more? How has your life changed since the first bout?
- mixmastamyk 10y agoWell, the book gives you one way to financial independence (though it is a bit outdated now), that may be important to you. The movie gives background on why consumerism does not fulfill us.
- Clubber 10y agoIt's easy to be happy. Read a book about life in a WWI trench, read a book about a former slave, read a book about the plague. Go visit an old folks home. Read about parents who lost their kids in a tragic accident. Just remembering those things make me realize that I should be happy with what I have.
- r00fus 10y agoSounds like a recipe for happiness guilt. I did a stint with my audiobooks during commute - read a lot of SF dystopian future. Guess what? It didn't make me feel better. I just felt sad. Listening to music or reading less depressing books lifted my gloom. YMMV.
- ajeet_dhaliwal 10y agoSame, seeing or reading about more misery never makes me happier, just worse. Watching happy things makes me happy. It's the only reason I watch a stupid show like Ballers on HBO or Bollywood movies. Not necessarily deep but they are happy and fun.
- projektir 10y agoI don't understand the framework where the extreme suffering of others can make one happy...
- Qantourisc 10y agoBecause, at least for some people, it put their minor problems into perspective. After which they apply the proper amount of emotional response to minor problem.
- projektir 10y agoHence the question about the framework, because what kind of a resolution is that if you stop and think about it for a second? You saw something really bad and that made you feel better about things? Your life is a bit better than theirs, what does this mean? It doesn't make yours suddenly better. And it certainly makes the whole world worse. Those people are part of the world you live in, and your world just got worse. Someone gave you a random number. Say, 23. You have a biological device programmed to set this random number as your "default". It has no frame of reference. It's not objective. All it does is tell you things are bad when you feel lower than that number, and good when you feel higher than that number. Then you found someone else and their number is a lot lower. Like, 6. You have now decided that your number is pretty awesome because it's so much higher than theirs! Later, you see someone with a 50. And you're jealous because they're a lot higher than you. Except you have never seen the full graph. You don't even have any way to really evaluate "so much higher" except that same biological device that you so hastily discredited. Maybe the max number is 30. Or 50. Or a 100. Or a million. And the most important thing - your number is still 23. You didn't put your problems in perspective. To have perspective, you need to know how wide the possibility set is, and you don't know that. All you did is calibrated down, and reduced your expectations. But that doesn't change reality. Your minor problem may as well be bigger than you imagine it, you have no frame of reference, how can you possibly tell?
- auganov 10y agoDo we have any decent evidence of raising unhappiness? Say looking at proxies like suicide rates does not suggest any particularly strong trend in either direction?
- fallingfrog 10y agoCome on! We live in a world which is specifically designed to make us unhappy. I mean most of us don't even have the option to be less materialistic; most jobs that pay enough that you could spend less time at work don't give you the option of doing so. So the only freedom left to people is the freedom to choose how their money is spent. Human relations are constantly being squeezed out and replaced with business deals. And I keep seeing these articles blaming the victims. Folks, this is not some unintended side effect of capitalism- this is the way the system is supposed to work. You're not supposed to be happy.
- romaniv 10y agoIf this was an issue with capitalism in general we wouldn't be discussing it this way, since the issue would date back at lease a century.
- ashark 10y ago> If this was an issue with capitalism in general we wouldn't be discussing it this way, since the issue would date back at lease a century. Unless I'm misunderstanding what "this" and "it" refer to, it's not exactly a new topic. Identity, ego, happiness, capitalism, consumerism, work, family, and their various relationships and conflicts have been discussed in ways nearly indistinguishable from how they are today since the dawn of the modern global economy (the 50s), and similar issues have been covered by Western writers since at least the 19th century (much farther back, depending on how much you want to stretch "similar").
- dragonwriter 10y agoThe issue has been discussed for at least a century; as well as being directly discussed, its been a common and recurring theme of art and literature within and concerning the capitalist economies for more than a century.
- hgh 10y agoIs that true? Take a look at e.g. https://stats.oecd.org/Index.aspx?DataSetCode=ANHRS# https://stats.oecd.org/Index.aspx?DataSetCode=ANHRS#. In most places, people are working less hours, and they have significantly higher standards of living in many ways. Especially in software development, there are enormous opportunities to work however you like for as many hours as you like. Sure, if you want a mid six-figure salary and try to keep up with the Jones' in SF you'll need to sacrifice some leisure and relationships, but that's not universally true. If your preference is to enjoy meaningful relationships and leisure time outside of work, and you have STEM skills, this is a great time to be alive.
- mizzao 10y agoI haven't read the book, but is the article arguing that rampant individualism leads to unhappiness, or the lack of detachment and focus on "communities"? It seems to mention both. For those who haven't seen it, this article also argues the former: http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/20/opinion/the-fragmented-society.html http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/20/opinion/the-fragmented-soc...
- SFJulie 10y agoLol, his thesis is a song that is sang to kids in Elsass to remind them that you are always unsatisfied when only focused on what you want and not what you have. D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch hät àlles, wàs er will ! Un wàs er hät, dess will er nit, Un wàs er will, dess hät er nit. D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch hät àlles, wàs er will ! D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch sajt àlles, wàs er will ! Wàs er sajt, dess dankt er nit, Un wàs er dankt, dess sajt er nit, D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch sajt àlles, wàs er will ! D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch màcht àlles, wàs er will ! Wàs er màcht, dess soll er nit, Un wàs er soll, dess màcht er nit. D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch màcht àlles, wàs er will ! D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch geht ànne, wo er will ! Wo er isch, dò bliebt er nit, Un wo er bliebt, dò gfàllts im nit. D’r Hans im Schnòckeloch geht ànne, wo er will ! Jetzt het d’r Hans sò sàtt Un isch vom Eland màtt. Lawe, majnt er, kànn er nit, Un sterwe, sajt er, will er nit. Er springt züem Fenschter nüss, Un kommt ins Nàrrehüss.
- tuna-piano 10y ago"As time went by, the settlers from Europe noticed something: No Indians were defecting to join colonial society, but many whites were defecting to live in the Native American one." The passage shocked me, as it is extremely surprising, and speaks to the core of our societal growth over the past few hundreds of years not leading to maximum happiness. The passage is from this David Brooks column (which I think is definitely worth the three minutes to read): http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/09/opinion/the-great-affluence-fallacy.html http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/09/opinion/the-great-affluenc... The core thought is that people trade up for comfort (including privacy), but that they lose out on the overall bonds with other people that are what really makes us happy. One extremely clear choice: Do you work from home (more comfy) or an office (more social)? The work from home choice seems extremely relevant to me. Is it actually bad for happiness in the long term to do something that's so much more comfortable (no commuting, no dressing up, feeling of being at home, etc)? When I think about the best times in my own life, they were the times when I had a close group of people I lived and hung out with (college, summer camp, etc). I assume it's the same for many others reading this. So why do we not live more like that into our adult years?
- yankeehue 10y agoI work from home. If I were single or if the kids had moved out of the house and my SO worked, your comment would probably be true for me (better to be in the office). But, I've had a chance to see my young children grow up in a way that couldn't have happened had I been in the office, all while doing significant meaningful work. Certainly that's more social with a closer group of people (family). So, it probably depends on circumstances.
- KurtMueller 10y agoWhat meaningful work did you do?
- gajjanag 10y ago> The core thought is that people trade up for comfort (including privacy), but that they lose out on the overall bonds with other people that are what really makes us happy. The fundamental importance of high quality bonds with other people is something I wish was emphasised more. The following TED talk describes a pretty interesting research experiment done over a long time frame which essentially comes to this conclusion: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KkKuTCFvzI https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KkKuTCFvzI
- grillvogel 10y ago"Imagine a society that subjects people to conditions that make them terribly unhappy, then gives them the drugs to take away their unhappiness. Science fiction? It is already happening to some extent in our own society. It is well known that the rate of clinical depression had been greatly increasing in recent decades. We believe that this is due to disruption of the power process...The entertainment industry serves as an important psychological tool of the system, possibly even when it is dishing out large amounts of sex and violence. Entertainment provides modern man with an essential means of escape. While absorbed in television, videos, etc., he can forget stress, anxiety, frustration, dissatisfaction" 5 points to whoever can guess what this quote is from
- ewhanley 10y agoThat's old Teddy K
- la6470 10y agoAsk yourselves and answer brutally honestly If an Asian or African had said the same thing would it hold as much value to you? "Is it possible that a starving African farmer has less sense of injustice than a middle-aged western male who has never been fellated?"