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Simplicity is hard. Let’s go shopping
- spudlyo 17y agoVery enjoyable. I've had similar conversations with my better half. I need to simplify my life as well, I just moved and have boxes of cables to electronics I no longer own. Why can't I bring myself to get rid of that first gen tivo hard-to-find console cable? I don't know.
- mrduncan 17y agoI've always found moving to be the best time to get rid of things. If it hasn't been used since the last time I moved or I don't feel like packing it, it's gone.
- GrandMasterBirt 17y agoThis article is really an anti-hording thing. I immediately realized how many items I have in my house that go unused FOREVER. My wife has been begging me to throw some things out. I am considering just looking through anything, if its a wire that has a 60% chance of being usused forever, scrapped, a cd, scrapped, a tv, scrapped. I want to do the same with my kid's toys (she has lots but plays with a key few (3year old), I mean really the biggest things we use are our computers. Although I found a use for old textbooks: Computer monitor stands.
- chronomex 17y agoSecond the textbook suggestion. Last year I actually used my physics book for a monitor stand before the quarter was even over. Shhh, don't tell my folks.
- fr0sty 17y agofreecycle them. There are groups in most population centers. Someone out there begging to find that tivo console cable. Me and my wife have been getting rid of items not valuable enough to sell but too valuable to pitch through that channel for a while now.
- wglb 17y agoThis post is a lot of fun, but with a very good point. I particularly like the end of the story where she says You're getting restaurant gift cards and socks
- wushupork 17y agoUpvoted for pure awesomeness. Coming from a struggling background my mom was a hoarder and I struggle with getting rid of stuff all the time which bugs the hell out of my wife who is a neat freak and likes to have her homespace look like a magazine/catalog home shoot.
- deleted 17y ago[deleted]
- hubb 17y agoby pure happenstance, a co-worker linked me today to mark's how to install windows in 5 hours (http://diveintomark.org/archives/2003/08/04/xp http://diveintomark.org/archives/2003/08/04/xp). i hadn't read his blog before, and he's got an entertaining style
- solutionyogi 17y agoI became fan of his writing after I read how I can make fruit salad and get laid. :) http://diveintomark.org/archives/2006/06/09/fruit-salad-recipe http://diveintomark.org/archives/2006/06/09/fruit-salad-reci...
- pingswept 17y ago"'Washing the fruit' just means running it under the tap for a few seconds, like how you wash your hands when you think no one is watching." Mark Pilgrim is pure comedic power.
- Raphael 17y agoCoincidentally, the first step is to go shopping.
- MarkPilgrim 17y agoThat post still gets 1500+ hits a month from people searching for variations of "fruit salad recipe." I get at least 1 email a month from random strangers who appreciated getting more than just a recipe. :)
- cubicle67 17y agoprotip: use http://www.magicaljellybean.com/keyfinder/ http://www.magicaljellybean.com/keyfinder/ to find your keys for Office/Windows etc
- byrneseyeview 17y agoI tend to use the "inversion" argument, but mostly with vacations and not physical stuff: "We should go to Barbados for a week. It's only $1000." "If someone offered to give you $1000, plus an extra week to accomplish stuff you want to do, wouldn't you take it?" This works with appliances, too: not buying that juicer means getting a few square feet of counterspace and $100.
- novum 17y agoThere's always an opportunity cost. Traditionally you see opportunity cost expressed in dollars; I haven't really thought to view it in time. But time is the most valuable resource there is. Money comes and goes, but would that week of time in Barbados have been better spent elsewhere?
- mos1 17y agoYes. I'd suggest Seychelles.
- eli 17y agoSometimes the long term gain of taking a nice relaxing vacation is easily worth $1000 and a temporary decline in productivity. Or, to put another way, what's the point of making money and getting things done if I never feel able to take a break? Edit: Reminds of Stefan Sagmeister's TED Talk: The power of time off. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNuOmTQdFjA http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNuOmTQdFjA
- orblivion 17y agoBut... you also don't have a juicer.
- byrneseyeview 17y agoWe ended up getting the juicer a couple weeks ago (due to a weird coincidence, we got it for free). It has been used once. It gets in my way every day.
- mstevens 17y agoI have several large boxes that haven't been opened in 2-3 moves. I still can't persuade myself to get rid of them.
- abstractbill 17y agoI moved from the UK to the US in 2003, with just a couple of bags of stuff. I threw away a bunch of my possessions when I moved, and the stuff I couldn't bear to throw away, I left in storage in the UK. On one of my trips back, I found a few big boxes full of my stuff and really couldn't remember what was in them. I'd been out of the country for a couple of years by that point, and clearly hadn't actually missed whatever was in these boxes. I threw them away without even opening them - still have no idea what they contained ;)
- dlib 17y agoThat sort of sums up my rule. If I haven't used it in the past five years, I toss it out. It's only rarely that I come across something that I threw away earlier. Only exception to this rule is books and I doubt that'll change.
- kscaldef 17y agoYou might be surprised. I used to think I would never get rid of any books. At some point after N moves and a decade of my decor being dominated by bookshelves I decided I no longer needed to own every book I had ever read in my life. I sold most of my text books on Amazon, except for my intro college science texts which I gave, along with most of my pop-sci books, to someone who worked with gifted high school students so he could pass them along. Most of the rest of the books went to a local used bookstore, or to the library. I kept my favorite books by my favorite authors; only the stuff I was sure I would reread. And, it turns out, I don't miss any of the books I got rid of.
- Sukotto 17y agoI had this problem too. We had a whole closet filled floor to ceiling with boxes of stuff that hadn't been unpacked in over 5 years. One Saturday afternoon, I pulled a box at a time out of the storage closet and the wife and I unpacked it onto the livingroom floor. Each item either: 1) Got placed in the "we will use it within 3 months" 2) Can sell for at least $20 3) Freecycle / Goodwill / Salvation Army 4) Trash I made 10 trips to our dumpster and 2 to Goodwill. (Am now working on selling the $20/each items) What am amazing relief. I had no idea how much that huge pile of boxes was weighing down the back of my mind. So far, we've encountered 2 things we regretted ditching. Honestly though, the only reason we regret it is that we know we had those things. If we hadn't unpacked those boxes I would almost certainly have bought them simply because I didn't even remember they were in a box "just in case I need it someday"
- mburney 17y agoGood overall point of view. But the author sounds like he's talking to his mother, not his wife. You have to be authoritative if you're going to undertake something that goes against the norm.
- nir 17y agoI'm guessing you're not married? (EDIT: I hope this isn't coming off as some '50s "take my wife" routine. My point is that marriage isn't about authority, it's about partnership)
- mburney 17y agoSince we're doing the ad hominem thing, I'm guessing that you're American, and your wife makes you sleep on the couch? In all seriousness, my point is that the person with the more radical view on how things ought to be done has to lead in that instance, and lead with authority. This doesn't imply the entire marriage is about that. But in this instance, yes. His wife would have been more receptive to his point of view if he delivered it with more authority. Passive aggressive "experiments" to prove a point will not influence her point of view and will not carry him closer to the goal of making their lives simpler.
- natrius 17y agoI don't think experimentation is passive-aggressiveness. It was a valid way to determine how often they actually use the TV to see if it was necessary. Radical views should be backed by solid evidence of their correctness.
- stonemetal 17y agoIt would have been an experiment if he had plugged it back in on request. That is to say the experiment determined they use the TV every six months or so. What actually happened is he made a unilateral decision to get rid of the TV. He couldn't do it by coming to agreement with his wife, so he removed all the cables and refused to restore them to force a change in his family's behavior.
- deleted 17y ago[deleted]
- orblivion 17y agoOne hell of a relationship this guy's got with his wife
- happenstance 17y agoHeh. Wait until you're married and have kids.
- tpyo 17y agoAre you saying we should just leave it?
- happenstance 17y ago> Are you saying we should just leave it? I don't know what you mean. I'm saying that you'll understand what Mark is talking about after you've gotten married and had children and want to keep your family intact.
- zackattack 17y agoStaying together just for the kids is a win-lose situation that will decrease your happiness and consequently the kids' as well. (I don't know anything about the author's particular situation.)
- happenstance 17y agoWhat you allude to in your first statement is incorrect for most cases, IMO. Staying together doesn't necessarily mean letting it decrease your happiness. It might just mean you have to get your happiness from a different place. Often in life you're not presented with win-lose situations. Instead, you're presented with lose-lose situations, and it's your job to choose the least worst solution for everyone involved.
- zackattack 17y ago
- mark_l_watson 17y agoThat was so cool. Simplicity is more difficult than clutter. My wife and I moved from a large, "partially cluttered" house on the beach to a small and very tidy house in the mountains. It was not easy going from 2600 sq ft to 1150 sq ft, and after moving 12 years ago we had to make a rule of getting rid of something when we bought anything new. It takes real energy to go through belongings and decide what to give to the Good Will or to toss.
- dasil003 17y agoI'm more interested in how it was going from 100 ft to 7000 ft since I'm planning on making that move myself.
- deleted 17y ago[deleted]
- andr 17y agoOne way I try to fight this is I bought a big cardboard box and put almost everything in it, which has doubtful usage. Stuff lingering on desks, old gadgets, etc. If I need something I take it out. Whatever is left in the box after a month I throw/give away. A few Arduino boards, accelerometers and RFID readers will soon be available to a good home.
- pingswept 17y agoI have done exactly the same thing. It's a great system, and it helps me keep my desk neat. I do have a lot of stuff though, so the cardboard box I got is quite large. I call it by a French name, "garage."
- phsr 17y agoA few Arduino boards, accelerometers and RFID readers will soon be available to a good home. Interested!!!
- jacobolus 17y agoMe too! If you (i.e. andr) want to send some along to a broke student (i.e. me) who’s been saying he’d get around to buying an arduino board or two & building something neat with a musician friend for months now, shoot me an email. :-)
- keeptrying 17y agoAbout 6 weeks ago, I had to pack up all the stuff in my Manhattan apartment and stick it into storage to tend to a family emergency. In 6 weeks I dont think I've missed anything except for a few books.
- llimllib 17y agoI've believed in simplicity for a long time, the wife not so much. I'd given up on getting her to buy in, when our house burned down (nobody was hurt). Now we both believe in simplicity! (also: buy renters' insurance, even if you're poor. Especially if you're poor.)
- ryanwaggoner 17y agoI'd given up on getting her to buy in, when our house burned down (nobody was hurt). Now we both believe in simplicity! Hmm...how convenient :)
- AndrewWarner 17y agoI really wish more people would accept that giving me something isn't the way to celebrate my birthday or any other event.
- johnrob 17y agoI used to wonder why it's so hard to buy gifts for people. Then I realized the answer is that most people already have way more crap than they need.
- MarkPilgrim 17y agoLeft to my own devices, I would never leave the house. So I ask for experiences. From my wife, I ask for her to find a local event that I wouldn't think of going to by myself, and to arrange tickets/reservations/etc. From my parents (who live nearby), I ask for them to watch our kids while my wife and I go to said event. It works well.
- trafficlight 17y agoI really like this idea. I, too, hate getting gifts. I already buy the things I need and gifts just end up getting stacked in the corner.
- TheSOB88 17y agoWhat about those other people? I forget what they are called. Frems? Fronds?
- euccastro 17y agoI ask for nothing and I get experiences. She loves to plan, book, etc., while I usually find those events worthwhile only after the fact. Win-win, in the end.
- houseabsolute 17y agoThey are probably wishing that you would lighten up. Edit: I know this seems trollish, but it's probably also true. Although I could have worded it better, my point is that your expectation that people _not_ give physical gifts is no different or more noble than other peoples' expectation that you accept physical gifts. Recognizing that, there's the tried and truism that it's easier to change things about yourself than things about others.
- mixmax 17y agoMove to a boat, that will solve the problem instantly. I have roughly 16 square meters of indoor living area, and that has to accommodate kitchen, sleeping quarters, bathroom, steering, a sofa and a table where 8 people can eat for when I have dining visitors. For very natural reasons you just don't have a lot of stuff.
- deleted 17y ago[deleted]
- spoiledtechie 17y agoI actually had to move to VA about 4 months ago to take a job. I decided to go through EVERYTHING in my life and see what I needed and didn't, so I took a 3 bedroom two bath house worth of JUNK and shrunk it down to an 6X8 Uhaul Trailer. I now have 3 computers, 2 chairs, a bed, a rowing machine to stay in shape, some books and thats all I would take with me again if I did the same thing.. Ive never been so happy with all the junk I don't have... I highly recommend living a minimalistic life style.
- Psyonic 17y ago3 computers? I'm sure you have your reasons, but seems a little complicated
- araneae 17y agoIs it just me, or does this title reek of disdain for his wife and/or all women? To spell it out: the "let's go shopping" meme indicates stupidity on the part of women. Here he's using it seriously to complain about his wife having "difficulty" with simplicity. This in turn implies that women in general have this difficulty, and this is a negative trait of the sex at large. Maybe I'm being a little sensitive here, but I kind of want to smack this guy.
- mnemonicsloth 17y agoYes, Mark's wife is obviously not tech-savvy enough to read her husband's blog. Even if there were a big, strong man around to read it to her, she would be the first to agree that it isn't a woman's place to stand up for herself.
- araneae 17y agoI don't understand this response. I really couldn't care less about his wife. I'd just want to smack him if I were her. Or even if I were me. Which I am.
- MarkPilgrim 17y agoDid you miss the paragraph about snowclones? Snowclones are the new black.
- mynameishere 17y agoThis is perhaps my first meta-comment, but I can't believe such a unbelievably banal post got 238 upmods here. "I tried to unplug my TV, my wife fought against it." That's it. Pathetic.