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Honestly, I expect the rich to just buy a damn therapist rather than complain to the rest of us. They have enough money to pay someone to care, but they yap to

Honestly, I expect the rich to just buy a damn therapist rather than complain to the rest of us. They have enough money to pay someone to care, but they yap to us and expect it for free.

sowbug 11y ago
You mentioned money five times in two sentences. This is in a conversation about a person trying to talk about feelings.
- chii 11y ago
  and as someone who may not have their money problem solved, it makes it difficult to discuss the possibility that feelings of this nature a real problem. It's similar to the privilege problem that man faces - no man can really understand their privilege and the position a women is in when she is discriminated, because men don't face that problem and never has.
josscrowcroft 11y ago
I was sorry to read this. From my perspective, this comment broadly captures what is so tragic for me about his situation and the potential pitfalls of isolation-by-riches: the apparent fact that the majority of people discount a wealthy man's cry for help (read "willingness to be vulnerable"), dehumanising him and robbing him of an opportunity to heal - whether through therapy, community, or some other significant life change.
- hobs 11y ago
  They do that because they measure the rich person's woes and find that they are considerably less than theirs, its basically that they don't appreciate the person in the sedan chair complaining about the heat. A wealthy person is still a person, but when another looks at their burden and finds it lighter than their own, they often don't pity them because they perceive they can much more easily mobilize their own help (see: an article about a billionaire's emotional state vs European immigration crisis.) Basically, the "pitfall" of isolation by riches is a problem a large portion of humans would like to have.
- cryoshon 11y ago
  Nobody is robbing Notch of his opportunity to heal. We as internet commentators can't do that. We're not really dehumanizing him, either-- just pointing out that his burden is light relative to most. If you're having trouble carrying a light weight, sure, get help. It just seems pretty childish to complain to an open microphone about a something so petty. I have no doubt these emotions are very tough for Notch, and I see that I would probably have the same problems in his situation. But seriously, this isn't the kind of thing you say to a wide audience without being completely out of touch. He should know better.
  - Killswitch 11y ago
    > just pointing out that his burden is light relative to most. Yeah, and as someone who makes enough money to not worry about not being on the streets, but also not enough to be able to just do anything I want, my burden is light relative to people in 3rd world countries. No matter what you say, someone's burden is light compared to another, and completely denying someone like Notch the right to be able to get their burden off their chest, just because their's is less than yours, is asinine.
    - cryoshon 11y ago
      You wouldn't complain to someone who couldn't afford to eat that you couldn't afford a Ferrari, right? Same principle applies here...
wordbank 11y ago
This kind of attitude is the exact source of his suffering.
charlesdm 11y ago
Just because one is wealthy does not mean that all your problems will suddenly go away. Yes, you won't end up on the street because you can't pay your rent, but it does create a ton of new problems that can lead to isolation. A few that come to mind, that I've noticed with wealthy friends: 1. Time. You'll probably have plenty. You're free. What do you do all day when your old friends are working? That probably means making new friends. But it can also lead to disconnects with old friends. Most people don't understand. 2. Ulterior motives of people. Imagine you meet a person - any person. Most relatively wealthy people will assume this person wants something from them. Guess what, people DO usually want something from them. This can lead to problems bonding and/or having relationships. 3. Investing and taxes: what if I invest badly and lose all my capital? Ok, so you invest in a property in Spain and a few years later sell it. You pay $x tax. For some silly reason the authorities don't agree, and want to levy additional tax x2. On top of that, your tax lawyer isn't great, and you need to go find a new one. It'll drag on for years, going through the courts. etc etc Many people would say, cry me a river. Obviously it's better to be wealthy than to be poor, but it's not all it's made out to be. No therapist is going to fix that. Problems are problems, and I personally respect that everyone has their own set of issues in life. Wealth can be a burden.
- crdoconnor 11y ago
  >Just because one is wealthy does not mean that all your problems will suddenly go away. Nope. It does mean that you lose the right to complain though.
  - wordbank 11y ago
    > Nope. It does mean that you lose the right to complain though. Yeah, let's isolate rich persons even more instead of helping them to find their way together with us. That's for sure will lead to a better world where rich can connect with others and share their fortunes for a common good. /s
  - shkkmo 11y ago
    You can complain, just don't blame the money. Or if you do, get rid of it.
shkkmo 11y ago
Yeah, seriously. If your money is making you so unhappy, put some in a trust for your kids and donate the rest to worthy charities. There, problem solved. I don't really have any sympathy. Plus, his former staff who he sold out needs to reach out to him to apologize? "So fuck all of you. Fuck you so hard." I lost a lot of respect for that man.
- andrepd 11y ago
  You may be getting downvoted, but you are not wrong. If money truly made him unhappy, why didn't he keep a few million in his bank account, invest another couple million or put in a trust fund, and donate the remaining money? He would still be a rich man, live for the rest of his life without working and without financial worries, and the super-richness that seemingly made him so sad and alienated his friends is gone. As it stands, he just comes across as somebody wiping tears with a 100 dollar bill.
dang 11y ago
This comment breaks the HN guidelines. It also shouldn't have been a reply to the top comment. (We detached it from https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=10140066. https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=10140066.) Please don't post spiteful swipes here.

Honestly, I expect the rich to just buy a damn therapist rather than complain to the rest of us. They have enough money to pay someone to care, but they yap to us and expect it for free.

sowbug 11y ago

You mentioned money five times in two sentences. This is in a conversation about a person trying to talk about feelings.

chii 11y ago
and as someone who may not have their money problem solved, it makes it difficult to discuss the possibility that feelings of this nature a real problem. It's similar to the privilege problem that man faces - no man can really understand their privilege and the position a women is in when she is discriminated, because men don't face that problem and never has.

josscrowcroft 11y ago

I was sorry to read this. From my perspective, this comment broadly captures what is so tragic for me about his situation and the potential pitfalls of isolation-by-riches: the apparent fact that the majority of people discount a wealthy man's cry for help (read "willingness to be vulnerable"), dehumanising him and robbing him of an opportunity to heal - whether through therapy, community, or some other significant life change.

hobs 11y ago
They do that because they measure the rich person's woes and find that they are considerably less than theirs, its basically that they don't appreciate the person in the sedan chair complaining about the heat. A wealthy person is still a person, but when another looks at their burden and finds it lighter than their own, they often don't pity them because they perceive they can much more easily mobilize their own help (see: an article about a billionaire's emotional state vs European immigration crisis.) Basically, the "pitfall" of isolation by riches is a problem a large portion of humans would like to have.
cryoshon 11y ago
Nobody is robbing Notch of his opportunity to heal. We as internet commentators can't do that. We're not really dehumanizing him, either-- just pointing out that his burden is light relative to most. If you're having trouble carrying a light weight, sure, get help. It just seems pretty childish to complain to an open microphone about a something so petty. I have no doubt these emotions are very tough for Notch, and I see that I would probably have the same problems in his situation. But seriously, this isn't the kind of thing you say to a wide audience without being completely out of touch. He should know better.
- Killswitch 11y ago
  > just pointing out that his burden is light relative to most. Yeah, and as someone who makes enough money to not worry about not being on the streets, but also not enough to be able to just do anything I want, my burden is light relative to people in 3rd world countries. No matter what you say, someone's burden is light compared to another, and completely denying someone like Notch the right to be able to get their burden off their chest, just because their's is less than yours, is asinine.
  - cryoshon 11y ago
    You wouldn't complain to someone who couldn't afford to eat that you couldn't afford a Ferrari, right? Same principle applies here...

wordbank 11y ago

This kind of attitude is the exact source of his suffering.

charlesdm 11y ago

Just because one is wealthy does not mean that all your problems will suddenly go away. Yes, you won't end up on the street because you can't pay your rent, but it does create a ton of new problems that can lead to isolation. A few that come to mind, that I've noticed with wealthy friends: 1. Time. You'll probably have plenty. You're free. What do you do all day when your old friends are working? That probably means making new friends. But it can also lead to disconnects with old friends. Most people don't understand. 2. Ulterior motives of people. Imagine you meet a person - any person. Most relatively wealthy people will assume this person wants something from them. Guess what, people DO usually want something from them. This can lead to problems bonding and/or having relationships. 3. Investing and taxes: what if I invest badly and lose all my capital? Ok, so you invest in a property in Spain and a few years later sell it. You pay $x tax. For some silly reason the authorities don't agree, and want to levy additional tax x2. On top of that, your tax lawyer isn't great, and you need to go find a new one. It'll drag on for years, going through the courts. etc etc Many people would say, cry me a river. Obviously it's better to be wealthy than to be poor, but it's not all it's made out to be. No therapist is going to fix that. Problems are problems, and I personally respect that everyone has their own set of issues in life. Wealth can be a burden.

crdoconnor 11y ago
>Just because one is wealthy does not mean that all your problems will suddenly go away. Nope. It does mean that you lose the right to complain though.
- wordbank 11y ago
  > Nope. It does mean that you lose the right to complain though. Yeah, let's isolate rich persons even more instead of helping them to find their way together with us. That's for sure will lead to a better world where rich can connect with others and share their fortunes for a common good. /s
- shkkmo 11y ago
  You can complain, just don't blame the money. Or if you do, get rid of it.

shkkmo 11y ago

Yeah, seriously. If your money is making you so unhappy, put some in a trust for your kids and donate the rest to worthy charities. There, problem solved. I don't really have any sympathy. Plus, his former staff who he sold out needs to reach out to him to apologize? "So fuck all of you. Fuck you so hard." I lost a lot of respect for that man.

andrepd 11y ago
You may be getting downvoted, but you are not wrong. If money truly made him unhappy, why didn't he keep a few million in his bank account, invest another couple million or put in a trust fund, and donate the remaining money? He would still be a rich man, live for the rest of his life without working and without financial worries, and the super-richness that seemingly made him so sad and alienated his friends is gone. As it stands, he just comes across as somebody wiping tears with a 100 dollar bill.

dang 11y ago

This comment breaks the HN guidelines. It also shouldn't have been a reply to the top comment. (We detached it from https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=10140066. https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=10140066.) Please don't post spiteful swipes here.