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Or an open relationship. There are many options people may choose.

rm_-rf_slash 11y ago
That I'm fine with as long as it's open and honest. Alternatively, there is the Japanese angle of "It's not cheating if I pay for it."
- zimpenfish 11y ago
  "Is it adultery if I'm committing it at one end of a guy and he's committing it at the other end of that same guy?" (Dan Savage, Colbert Report)
crikli 11y ago
Tobias: You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed, but free to explore extra-marital encounters. Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people? Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but ... But it might work for us.
- spacemanmatt 11y ago
  Heh. Some people aren't up to it.
  - Karunamon 11y ago
    It requires a completely different mindset to relationships, most importantly, two people with that same completely different mindset, it's counter to most culture and how most of us were raised, but it can and does work. Also, I find interesting the survivorship (or perhaps anti-survivorship?) bias in a marital counselor talking about how a certain arrangement doesn't work.. what about all those people who never sought counseling because their relationships are happy?
- kiba 11y ago
  You believe it never works out?
- davemel37 11y ago
  This is my all time favorite scene in Arrested Development... "But in our case...i think it might!"
- oalders 11y ago
  "Tobias, you blowhard!"
- ossreality 11y ago
  For already failing marriages... duh.
amyjess 11y ago
I know trans people and spouses of trans people who have done this. Typically, one of them will come out and begin transition, but the other is 100% straight. They don't want to divorce, since they're still in love, but one of them isn't going to be attracted to the other anymore, so they agree to an open relationship so they can continue to be sexually satisfied while still remaining a couple.

That I'm fine with as long as it's open and honest. Alternatively, there is the Japanese angle of "It's not cheating if I pay for it."

zimpenfish 11y ago
"Is it adultery if I'm committing it at one end of a guy and he's committing it at the other end of that same guy?" (Dan Savage, Colbert Report)

crikli 11y ago

Tobias: You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed, but free to explore extra-marital encounters. Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people? Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but ... But it might work for us.

spacemanmatt 11y ago
Heh. Some people aren't up to it.
- Karunamon 11y ago
  It requires a completely different mindset to relationships, most importantly, two people with that same completely different mindset, it's counter to most culture and how most of us were raised, but it can and does work. Also, I find interesting the survivorship (or perhaps anti-survivorship?) bias in a marital counselor talking about how a certain arrangement doesn't work.. what about all those people who never sought counseling because their relationships are happy?
kiba 11y ago
You believe it never works out?
davemel37 11y ago
This is my all time favorite scene in Arrested Development... "But in our case...i think it might!"
oalders 11y ago
"Tobias, you blowhard!"
ossreality 11y ago
For already failing marriages... duh.

amyjess 11y ago

I know trans people and spouses of trans people who have done this. Typically, one of them will come out and begin transition, but the other is 100% straight. They don't want to divorce, since they're still in love, but one of them isn't going to be attracted to the other anymore, so they agree to an open relationship so they can continue to be sexually satisfied while still remaining a couple.