They value "the right technical decision" over human relationships and it doesn't seem to occur to them that the right outcome might be the one that makes someo

They value "the right technical decision" over human relationships and it doesn't seem to occur to them that the right outcome might be the one that makes someone else happy, or is the most diplomatic, even if it isn't "technically right". The question you should be asking is: A coworker tells me or my coworker that we're wrong, and it hurts our feelings, how do we deal with it? I've been in this situation a lot. I'm a social and diplomatic guy with a passion for programming but I've also been nonchalant or even careless and get told off for it a lot by colleagues with superior discipline and experience. It hurts when you think you're good at something, and someone points out a flaw that in retrospect is obvious or even dangerous. For me it helps to think highly of the people who gives me the criticism, even if I think they're dull and over-disciplined. I strive to one day be as cautious and knowledgeable as they are so code I write will be as reliable and robust. And ideally someday I'll look at their code and point out their negligence. In a team, I would try to publicly compliment the grumpy programmer on his feedback, and initiate conversation on how to set the tech straight. A positive reaction will temper his grumpiness and make him rethink his attitude, they might even backpedal and say 'well its not that big a deal' when you list the downsides of the 'right technical decision' as hurdles you are planning on overcoming. Once you've accepted someones feedback fully, it's much easier to negotiate. Note that you should only do this when it is 100% the case that this person is technically right.