4 ms·

I'm sad to see more political correctness invading these circles. A few years ago, I was so happy to see a girl every now and then at our LUG. Me and the other

• sanswork 11y ago
  It's not difficult to just treat people like normal humans. >Me and the other guys were jumping over each other to help her. This is an example of a problem where you think you're being helpful but all you're doing is separating someone from the group and probably harassing them. Were you and the other guys jumping over each other to help every guy that showed up? Why the women? Were you doing it because you were nice or because it was a woman and you hoped to get something in return? >Is she a lawsuit? Is she going to report me for code of conduct violations when things don't go her way? You talk about fear of criticizing this stuff but almost everyone who lives their lives in fear of a sexual discrimination lawsuit do so because they regularly act inappropriately around others. >Sure, the women may laugh at my jokes for a few months. But when I eventually tell her no for a reason based on her shortcomings, she can conveniently report me for revenge. Sure the woman may put up with your actions for a few months but everyone has a breaking point. Your whole post is about how sneaky and devious you see women as and how you fear for your safety due to these traits. You're like a self fulfilling prophecy. If you ever do end up involved in a lawsuit it likely won't be due to women in general being sneaky or seeking revenge it will likely be due to your belief that they act like that causing you to act negatively towards them.
  • Rumford 11y ago
    > This is an example of a problem where you think you're being helpful but all you're doing is separating someone from the group and probably harassing them. Choosing to interpret clumsiness as "abuse" is EXACTLY the problem he's describing. If "jumping over each other to help her" is inappropriate, then someone needs to describe what is appropriate when the group is trying to go out of their way to welcome someone who isn't the group's usual demographic. It is not OK to label everything they do as abusive without explaining what your standard for good behavior would be. > Were you doing it because you were nice or because it was a woman and you hoped to get something in return? And then you accuse him of viewing all women with suspicion. Do you not see the hypocrisy? > Your whole post is about how sneaky and devious you see women as and how you fear for your safety due to these traits. Again, stupendously wrong. I think you're twisting his words this way on purpose and it turns my stomach that people are getting away with this. He's not complaining about "women" being "devious." He's complaining about the poisonous and paranoid culture that is created when certain groups have carte blanche to hang the scarlet letter of "Harassment" on you for God-only-knows what reason. There is no question we should treat people with respect. But whether they belong to some minority, or some supposedly aggrieved group, DOES NOT MATTER. A person is a person. Isn't that the goal of "equality"? If there's a way you need other people to act in order for you to feel comfortable, fine, you have every right to tell people what those boundaries of yours are. At the same time though, your comfort zone does not automatically obligate everyone around you to change.
    • sanswork 11y ago
      I'm explaining why it is seen as a negative. Treating that person the same as anyone else is your group is what is appropriate. >And then you accuse him of viewing all women with suspicion. Do you not see the hypocrisy? I don't view all men with suspicion so no. I view men who act like he described with suspicion though. >He's not complaining about "women" being "devious." "Is she going to report me for code of conduct violations when things don't go her way?" That's actually exactly what he was doing. >He's complaining about the poisonous and paranoid culture that is created when certain groups have carte blanche to hang the scarlet letter of "Harassment" on you for God-only-knows what reason. No group has that ability though. What is happening is he's built up in his mind this boogyman and is letting his fears of it control his actions in such a way that he is actually making himself act in a negative way. >A person is a person. Isn't that the goal of "equality"? Yes, and that is exactly what I said above. He was describing a situation where him and his group were specifically not treating people equally and being upset because his actions in differentiating a person from his group was off putting. >At the same time though, your comfort zone does not automatically obligate everyone around you to change. The thing is though the community has decided on a set of rules for how people should act to be a part of it. If you can't live by those conventions then fine but you can't complain about being excluded from the community when you don't. If you find being asked to treat people civilly and equally to be a threat to you then odds are you really need to reevaluate who you are as a person. No one is perfect, everyone makes mistakes, everyone is an asshole at different times or acts inappropriately. Being able to recognize that you are in the wrong at those times instead of blaming society is a part of belonging to it though.