4 ms·

Being late every once in a while is not something I'll hold a grudge for - we all are late at one point or another for various valid reasons. It's those that ar

by kohanz 11y ago

Being late every once in a while is not something I'll hold a grudge for - we all are late at one point or another for various valid reasons. It's those that are chronically late, to the point that the only thing you can count on is them being late, that to me are implicitly disrespectful. They are basically saying "Your time is worth less than mine", just not to your face. It doesn't matter whether it is "intentional", because it is a relatively easy flaw to correct, especially given how many opportunities there are to practice getting better at it. So the lack of effort to correct it makes it basically equivalent to intent. I wouldn't expect punctuality from a teenager, but by the time you are an adult, you've had plenty of time to figure out a strategy that works for you, whether it is setting your watch ahead, catching the earlier bus, waking up earlier, etc.

lawnchair_larry 11y ago
"It doesn't matter whether it is "intentional", because it is a relatively easy flaw to correct, especially given how many opportunities there are to practice getting better at it. So the lack of effort to correct it makes it basically equivalent to intent." Could not be more wrong.
- mildbow 11y ago
  Larry. Dude. Get off your lawnchair, you're going to be late. again. Anyway, why do you think he is incorrect? Time-management is a skill: why would this specific case of it be un-learnable? Also, every time you decide that something happens to you/is out of your control, you are giving it power over you. Would you rather beat this minor time-management issue or decide that the universe is constantly and inexplicably throwing your day out of the loop? Which stance one gives you power vs taking it away?
mapt 11y ago
Unless the problem is not with an unusual preparation regime, but with a cognitive / personality defect. Hyperbolic discounting, moment to moment procrastination in task-switching, and difficulty managing time estimates and proceeding through a preparation process is a trait associated with adult Attention Deficit Disorder. The subject can feel all the guilt and fear in the world about wasting other people's time and looking like an imbecile, without it necessarily adding up to a durably effective scheduling regime. They're constantly checking the clock, and telling themselves "Well, I made it last time, I can spend another 2 minutes in the shower / under the covers / eating breakfast", and establishing a reliable habitual routine that follows a set pace is very difficult for them. It gets especially bad when this trait touches their sleeping habits, leading very often to sleep disorders, in the form of a psychogenic non-24 syndrome from putting off bedtime until they're ready to drop. I find it fairly likely that adult ADD traits, sometimes summarized as 'attentional indiscipline', are linked to modern multitasking (or Internet / gaming addiction, if you like) in the same way nearsightedness is linked to childhood literacy. *Childhood ADHD seems to be a broader category, extended beyond these classic traits into any reason a child might not enthusiastically embrace the American K-12 educational system

by kohanz 11y ago

lawnchair_larry 11y ago

"It doesn't matter whether it is "intentional", because it is a relatively easy flaw to correct, especially given how many opportunities there are to practice getting better at it. So the lack of effort to correct it makes it basically equivalent to intent." Could not be more wrong.

mildbow 11y ago
Larry. Dude. Get off your lawnchair, you're going to be late. again. Anyway, why do you think he is incorrect? Time-management is a skill: why would this specific case of it be un-learnable? Also, every time you decide that something happens to you/is out of your control, you are giving it power over you. Would you rather beat this minor time-management issue or decide that the universe is constantly and inexplicably throwing your day out of the loop? Which stance one gives you power vs taking it away?

mapt 11y ago

Unless the problem is not with an unusual preparation regime, but with a cognitive / personality defect. Hyperbolic discounting, moment to moment procrastination in task-switching, and difficulty managing time estimates and proceeding through a preparation process is a trait associated with adult Attention Deficit Disorder. The subject can feel all the guilt and fear in the world about wasting other people's time and looking like an imbecile, without it necessarily adding up to a durably effective scheduling regime. They're constantly checking the clock, and telling themselves "Well, I made it last time, I can spend another 2 minutes in the shower / under the covers / eating breakfast", and establishing a reliable habitual routine that follows a set pace is very difficult for them. It gets especially bad when this trait touches their sleeping habits, leading very often to sleep disorders, in the form of a psychogenic non-24 syndrome from putting off bedtime until they're ready to drop. I find it fairly likely that adult ADD traits, sometimes summarized as 'attentional indiscipline', are linked to modern multitasking (or Internet / gaming addiction, if you like) in the same way nearsightedness is linked to childhood literacy. *Childhood ADHD seems to be a broader category, extended beyond these classic traits into any reason a child might not enthusiastically embrace the American K-12 educational system