5 ms·

You miss my point. We can all agree that being late is bad. But why villianize late people as selfish, when in reality, most are just absent minded.

deleted 11y ago
[deleted]
snowpanda 11y ago
I agree, this also struck me as a very judgmental article. I understand that some people are late because they lack respect. But that doesn't mean EVERY person that's late, does so for the same reason. One of my old professors was usually a bit late, but he had a heart of gold and really had no intention of being rude, he was just extremely disorganized in every possible way. But at the end of the day, he would often stays hours after class helping people without getting paid (on a Friday). I learned so much from him because he genuinely cared. Society is so quick to point at people and make judgements. Like normloman said, ... this article needs to chill out a bit.
- vdaniuk 11y ago
  Usually, judgmental behavior stems from the incredible all-encompassing feeling of self-importance of those making a judgment. Chilling out is a preferred course of action. Also, hundreds of millions of people are parts of the cultures where it's absolutely normal to be late.
  - falcolas 11y ago
    The US isn't generally one of those cultures - expecting someone brought up in the US culture of timeliness to act like a Spaniard when someone else is late will is not a reasonable expectation. Not to mention, those inconvenienced by the late party also have expectations they have to meet, and so on. A professor who is 20 minutes late but still wants to lecture for a full hour can make you late for your next class, for which you are punished, not the previous lecturer. Should we chill? To a certain point. But after that point, it's our lives which are negatively affected, and being annoyed at someone who is making our lives harder is hardly unreasonable.
lps41 11y ago
Being absent-minded just shows that someone doesn't care enough to make an effort. Someone who cares about something will not be absent-minded about it if they are willing to try.
- vdaniuk 11y ago
  >Someone who cares about something will not be absent-minded about it if they are willing to try. I'd prefer a person who is constantly late than a one with your attitude.
  - mildbow 11y ago
    Wow. Personal attack huh? Anyway, each side is ugly in the extreme but consider the cost of each of the extreme. Person always late: wastes everyone's time. Person stewing about it: stews on silently. Which one is "evil"? Neither. Which one is inconsiderate?
    - vdaniuk 11y ago
      >Person stewing about it: stews on silently. This is just absurd. The linked article, the majority of comments and your own comments are not silent at all.
      - mildbow 11y ago
        Trust me, people stew about it a lot more than they speak up at the time. Which is why they are probably coming out of the woodwork now :) Also how did you figure out a majority of potential commentators aren't silent?
        vdaniuk 11y ago
        >majority A majority qualification wasn't present at any point in our short discussion. Don't move the goalposts. >how did you figure Impossible to do that. Maybe most potential commentators are so appalled by the aggressive and judgmental tone of the article/comments that they had to withdraw from the discussion. Let's not argue from speculation. >Trust me, people stew about it a lot more than they speak up at that time. I remain unconvinced.
theandrewbailey 11y ago
Absent mindedness is a character flaw. It's fair game to blame or villianize someone over it.
- vdaniuk 11y ago
  Wow, this is one petty evil comment.
  - mildbow 11y ago
    I don't agree. It definitely is a character flaw. Mind that we are talking about chronically late people. So, that equates being late with being an asshole with no respect for other people's time.
  - laichzeit0 11y ago
    It's weird you'd say that. What you repeatedly do, creates habit. Habits are what defines the character of someone. Your surprise seems to be grounded on the idea that lateness can be a habit formed in a way that the person has no control over it, that it's genetic perhaps? You'll be hard pressed to find many people that will agree with that thesis. It is habit formed by behaviour they have complete control over and to blame or villainize them is as akin to blame or villainize someone for e.g. masturbating in public.
chrisbennet 11y ago
I'm absent minded. Now my phone reminds me. Problem solved.

deleted 11y ago

[deleted]

snowpanda 11y ago

I agree, this also struck me as a very judgmental article. I understand that some people are late because they lack respect. But that doesn't mean EVERY person that's late, does so for the same reason. One of my old professors was usually a bit late, but he had a heart of gold and really had no intention of being rude, he was just extremely disorganized in every possible way. But at the end of the day, he would often stays hours after class helping people without getting paid (on a Friday). I learned so much from him because he genuinely cared. Society is so quick to point at people and make judgements. Like normloman said, ... this article needs to chill out a bit.

vdaniuk 11y ago
Usually, judgmental behavior stems from the incredible all-encompassing feeling of self-importance of those making a judgment. Chilling out is a preferred course of action. Also, hundreds of millions of people are parts of the cultures where it's absolutely normal to be late.
- falcolas 11y ago
  The US isn't generally one of those cultures - expecting someone brought up in the US culture of timeliness to act like a Spaniard when someone else is late will is not a reasonable expectation. Not to mention, those inconvenienced by the late party also have expectations they have to meet, and so on. A professor who is 20 minutes late but still wants to lecture for a full hour can make you late for your next class, for which you are punished, not the previous lecturer. Should we chill? To a certain point. But after that point, it's our lives which are negatively affected, and being annoyed at someone who is making our lives harder is hardly unreasonable.

lps41 11y ago

Being absent-minded just shows that someone doesn't care enough to make an effort. Someone who cares about something will not be absent-minded about it if they are willing to try.

vdaniuk 11y ago
>Someone who cares about something will not be absent-minded about it if they are willing to try. I'd prefer a person who is constantly late than a one with your attitude.
- mildbow 11y ago
  Wow. Personal attack huh? Anyway, each side is ugly in the extreme but consider the cost of each of the extreme. Person always late: wastes everyone's time. Person stewing about it: stews on silently. Which one is "evil"? Neither. Which one is inconsiderate?
  - vdaniuk 11y ago
    >Person stewing about it: stews on silently. This is just absurd. The linked article, the majority of comments and your own comments are not silent at all.
    - mildbow 11y ago
      Trust me, people stew about it a lot more than they speak up at the time. Which is why they are probably coming out of the woodwork now :) Also how did you figure out a majority of potential commentators aren't silent?
      - vdaniuk 11y ago
        >majority A majority qualification wasn't present at any point in our short discussion. Don't move the goalposts. >how did you figure Impossible to do that. Maybe most potential commentators are so appalled by the aggressive and judgmental tone of the article/comments that they had to withdraw from the discussion. Let's not argue from speculation. >Trust me, people stew about it a lot more than they speak up at that time. I remain unconvinced.

theandrewbailey 11y ago

Absent mindedness is a character flaw. It's fair game to blame or villianize someone over it.

vdaniuk 11y ago
Wow, this is one petty evil comment.
- mildbow 11y ago
  I don't agree. It definitely is a character flaw. Mind that we are talking about chronically late people. So, that equates being late with being an asshole with no respect for other people's time.
- laichzeit0 11y ago
  It's weird you'd say that. What you repeatedly do, creates habit. Habits are what defines the character of someone. Your surprise seems to be grounded on the idea that lateness can be a habit formed in a way that the person has no control over it, that it's genetic perhaps? You'll be hard pressed to find many people that will agree with that thesis. It is habit formed by behaviour they have complete control over and to blame or villainize them is as akin to blame or villainize someone for e.g. masturbating in public.

chrisbennet 11y ago

I'm absent minded. Now my phone reminds me. Problem solved.