5 ms·

Likewise. I'm 2.04m and I never recline without asking. I expect the same courtesy from those sitting in front of me

by rfergie 11y ago

lawnchair_larry 11y ago
I'm not sure that asking actually makes it any better. Has anyone ever said no?
- rfergie 11y ago
  About half say no in my experience. But I'm not sure it really is about the yes/no answer - it is more a display of courtesy to someone whom you are about to cause discomfort
  - darklajid 11y ago
    Let me play the devil's advocate: If you're convinced that this WILL cause discomfort, why are you asking people - which very well might be too polite/afraid/distracted to decline - if you can do that? Aren't you, based on your very own impression and description of reclining, asking people if you can slap them every 10min for the rest of the flight? (I dislike flying in general, and I never had to take a flight longer than 4.5 hours. I couldn't care less about the argument, but would probably lean towards the 'So my chair can be set back. I guess I use it as intended' position)
    - dragonwriter 11y ago
      > Aren't you, based on your very own impression and description of reclining, asking people if you can slap them every 10min for the rest of the flight? A slap with consent may be weird, but a slap without consent is battery. So, if one accepts your slap analogy, there's a good reason to ask consent.
      - darklajid 11y ago
        That's twisting the idea quite a bit. For me there is no analogy or issue. Ignoring the 'I think flights are crap in general' base line: My seat. I recline it or not, but that's my decision. I would have a harder time to recline it, if I'd be convinced that this is in some way 'hard' on the one behind me. But IF I were convinced that this was 'hard' for the person behind me, I'd not ask them for consent. A) They say "Please don't recline". Hah! I'm right! And I'm a great person for asking, and now not reclining my seat. Go me. B) They say "Enjoy" B1) Hmm. I am convinced that this reclining thing is bad for people in the seats behind the person in question. They agreed, but unless I'm wrong I'm now making their life miserable. But yeah - they're fine with it? B2) Interesting. Maybe reclining isn't that bad? I should reflect and think about whether my 'reclining is bad and torture' idea is sensible.
        dragonwriter 11y ago
        Or, maybe all possible people sitting behind you aren't identical, and reclining is really bad for some of them and not others, and asking gives them the opportunity to let you know whether it's bad for the one actually affected in the particular instance.
        darklajid 11y ago
        Touche, you're right. Note that the first post I replied to said it is more a display of courtesy to someone whom you are about to cause discomfort which my English as a second language skills parse as unconditionally causing discomfort (after asking). That's the twist. IF you are convinced that reclining your seat causes discomfort, would asking for permission be the right thing to do? (Obviously I might just plain suck at English once more and fail to understand that sentence correctly)
        rfergie 11y ago
        Just to be clear - if they say "no" then I don't recline. But I can see that this isn't clear from my original post so sorry for causing confusion
themartorana 11y ago
You shouldn't. It's rather entitled. When I pay for a seat on a plane, I'm paying for everything that goes along with it. I won't slam my seat back, but it's going back, and I'm not going to ask your permission because I'm never going to give you the opportunity to say "no."
- k-mcgrady 11y ago
  >> When I pay for a seat on a plane, I'm paying for everything that goes along with it And how about the person behind who can no longer make use of the entertainment system or tray table?
  - patcheudor 11y ago
    I've never been in a situation where the person head of me who has reclined their seat makes the entertainment system and tray table no longer available to me. The fact is, that person ahead of me paid for the space they've used to recline and it's theirs, not mine, period. If I try to block them from reclining, then I'm exercising my ego over theirs by denying them something which is rightfully theirs, which they paid for. That is wrong and tends to fall into a behavior covered in the DSM.
    - rfergie 11y ago
      If the entertainment system is mounted in the head of the seat in front then reclining that chair brings it well below my eyeline - I cannot slump low enough in my seat so that I can see it.
      - patcheudor 11y ago
        But you can put your seat back and now you can see it. That is space that you rightfully are entitled to so use it.
        rfergie 11y ago
        If this a tragedy of the commons type scenario? Individual comfort is maximised if you recline, but the comfort of the cabin as a whole is better if only some people recline?

Likewise. I'm 2.04m and I never recline without asking. I expect the same courtesy from those sitting in front of me

by rfergie 11y ago

Likewise. I'm 2.04m and I never recline without asking. I expect the same courtesy from those sitting in front of me

lawnchair_larry 11y ago

I'm not sure that asking actually makes it any better. Has anyone ever said no?

rfergie 11y ago
About half say no in my experience. But I'm not sure it really is about the yes/no answer - it is more a display of courtesy to someone whom you are about to cause discomfort
- darklajid 11y ago
  Let me play the devil's advocate: If you're convinced that this WILL cause discomfort, why are you asking people - which very well might be too polite/afraid/distracted to decline - if you can do that? Aren't you, based on your very own impression and description of reclining, asking people if you can slap them every 10min for the rest of the flight? (I dislike flying in general, and I never had to take a flight longer than 4.5 hours. I couldn't care less about the argument, but would probably lean towards the 'So my chair can be set back. I guess I use it as intended' position)
  - dragonwriter 11y ago
    > Aren't you, based on your very own impression and description of reclining, asking people if you can slap them every 10min for the rest of the flight? A slap with consent may be weird, but a slap without consent is battery. So, if one accepts your slap analogy, there's a good reason to ask consent.
    - darklajid 11y ago
      That's twisting the idea quite a bit. For me there is no analogy or issue. Ignoring the 'I think flights are crap in general' base line: My seat. I recline it or not, but that's my decision. I would have a harder time to recline it, if I'd be convinced that this is in some way 'hard' on the one behind me. But IF I were convinced that this was 'hard' for the person behind me, I'd not ask them for consent. A) They say "Please don't recline". Hah! I'm right! And I'm a great person for asking, and now not reclining my seat. Go me. B) They say "Enjoy" B1) Hmm. I am convinced that this reclining thing is bad for people in the seats behind the person in question. They agreed, but unless I'm wrong I'm now making their life miserable. But yeah - they're fine with it? B2) Interesting. Maybe reclining isn't that bad? I should reflect and think about whether my 'reclining is bad and torture' idea is sensible.
      - dragonwriter 11y ago
        Or, maybe all possible people sitting behind you aren't identical, and reclining is really bad for some of them and not others, and asking gives them the opportunity to let you know whether it's bad for the one actually affected in the particular instance.
        darklajid 11y ago
        Touche, you're right. Note that the first post I replied to said it is more a display of courtesy to someone whom you are about to cause discomfort which my English as a second language skills parse as unconditionally causing discomfort (after asking). That's the twist. IF you are convinced that reclining your seat causes discomfort, would asking for permission be the right thing to do? (Obviously I might just plain suck at English once more and fail to understand that sentence correctly)
        rfergie 11y ago
        Just to be clear - if they say "no" then I don't recline. But I can see that this isn't clear from my original post so sorry for causing confusion

themartorana 11y ago

You shouldn't. It's rather entitled. When I pay for a seat on a plane, I'm paying for everything that goes along with it. I won't slam my seat back, but it's going back, and I'm not going to ask your permission because I'm never going to give you the opportunity to say "no."

k-mcgrady 11y ago
>> When I pay for a seat on a plane, I'm paying for everything that goes along with it And how about the person behind who can no longer make use of the entertainment system or tray table?
- patcheudor 11y ago
  I've never been in a situation where the person head of me who has reclined their seat makes the entertainment system and tray table no longer available to me. The fact is, that person ahead of me paid for the space they've used to recline and it's theirs, not mine, period. If I try to block them from reclining, then I'm exercising my ego over theirs by denying them something which is rightfully theirs, which they paid for. That is wrong and tends to fall into a behavior covered in the DSM.
  - rfergie 11y ago
    If the entertainment system is mounted in the head of the seat in front then reclining that chair brings it well below my eyeline - I cannot slump low enough in my seat so that I can see it.
    - patcheudor 11y ago
      But you can put your seat back and now you can see it. That is space that you rightfully are entitled to so use it.
      - rfergie 11y ago
        If this a tragedy of the commons type scenario? Individual comfort is maximised if you recline, but the comfort of the cabin as a whole is better if only some people recline?