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I go out in NYC alone all the time, on weekends, for fun - Mostly I do it because my friends are doctors and cant go out because they are on call - I wish I wou

I go out in NYC alone all the time, on weekends, for fun - Mostly I do it because my friends are doctors and cant go out because they are on call - I wish I would have realized much sooner how much fun you can actually have - at a bar, alone on a Saturday night in NYC I think there is a stigma attached going out alone though - I have random people ask me if I am alone and seem surprised by the answer. I do a lot of other stuff alone also, such as eating a restaurants, walking, etc. Going out alone is the most fun because there is alcohol involved. Moral of the story: You can still have fun, but if you have a girlfriend, wife, or good friends, it's definitely better than doing things alone (IMO)

Maven911 11y ago
Ive done the same in NYC but never truly enjoyed any of those alone experiences
- misiti3780 11y ago
  are you drinking when you go out or no? also - which neighborhoods did you try ?
dopeboy 11y ago
>> I think there is a stigma attached going out alone though - I have random people ask me if I am alone and seem surprised by the answer. This is the hardest part to combat, especially at a bar when there's no attraction (say, a sports game) on. There is such an intense expectation for group social activity in nightlife that makes it very hard to go solo. For this reason, I almost never have a good time going out to a bar by myself so I'm surprised you enjoy it. Theatres and restaurants, on the other hand, I have much better luck with.
- misiti3780 11y ago
  i agree - i think it is important to not look at your phone or a tv (when you are out), the reason you are out is to presumably meet people and have fun. the easiest way to avoid this issue in my experience is * make sure the bars you go in are crowded. * given (1), always look for a long line for a drink, it gives you a lot of time to start a convo * never sit down, always be standing (makes it it easier for people to approach you) * go out later at night, people are more intoxicated and are more willing to talk (for better or for worse) if a random person asks me if i am alone these days, i usually just tell them i am waiting for a friend that is running late and they drop it - but if i follow that check list, i never run into that situation anymore anyways. I hate sports and dont follow them so I can never use them as a conversation starter. i live in NYC and this works in the Lower East Side / East Village / West Village - San Fran might be tougher - not sure
QuantumRoar 11y ago
> I think there is a stigma attached going out alone though - I have random people ask me if I am alone and seem surprised by the answer. I've been doing things alone a lot since I moved to another city. And it really seems weird to the people I talk to. "Are you waiting for someone?" "No." "Are you alone?" "No. Look around. There are so many people here." I think the article is quite correct with the spot light theory. People are way too concerned about what others might think. So it actually seems to be a good thing that I mostly don't care about that. One downside for me is that – I asked a random stranger about that – it seems I don't look approachable. She said, it seemed to her that she needed to say something smart to me rather than just asking me if I want to have a drink with her. I haven't figured out what the reason is but I would really like to change that.

Maven911 11y ago

Ive done the same in NYC but never truly enjoyed any of those alone experiences

misiti3780 11y ago
are you drinking when you go out or no? also - which neighborhoods did you try ?

dopeboy 11y ago

>> I think there is a stigma attached going out alone though - I have random people ask me if I am alone and seem surprised by the answer. This is the hardest part to combat, especially at a bar when there's no attraction (say, a sports game) on. There is such an intense expectation for group social activity in nightlife that makes it very hard to go solo. For this reason, I almost never have a good time going out to a bar by myself so I'm surprised you enjoy it. Theatres and restaurants, on the other hand, I have much better luck with.

misiti3780 11y ago
i agree - i think it is important to not look at your phone or a tv (when you are out), the reason you are out is to presumably meet people and have fun. the easiest way to avoid this issue in my experience is * make sure the bars you go in are crowded. * given (1), always look for a long line for a drink, it gives you a lot of time to start a convo * never sit down, always be standing (makes it it easier for people to approach you) * go out later at night, people are more intoxicated and are more willing to talk (for better or for worse) if a random person asks me if i am alone these days, i usually just tell them i am waiting for a friend that is running late and they drop it - but if i follow that check list, i never run into that situation anymore anyways. I hate sports and dont follow them so I can never use them as a conversation starter. i live in NYC and this works in the Lower East Side / East Village / West Village - San Fran might be tougher - not sure

QuantumRoar 11y ago

> I think there is a stigma attached going out alone though - I have random people ask me if I am alone and seem surprised by the answer. I've been doing things alone a lot since I moved to another city. And it really seems weird to the people I talk to. "Are you waiting for someone?" "No." "Are you alone?" "No. Look around. There are so many people here." I think the article is quite correct with the spot light theory. People are way too concerned about what others might think. So it actually seems to be a good thing that I mostly don't care about that. One downside for me is that – I asked a random stranger about that – it seems I don't look approachable. She said, it seemed to her that she needed to say something smart to me rather than just asking me if I want to have a drink with her. I haven't figured out what the reason is but I would really like to change that.