Listen more, speak less. I can't say I have mastered it myself either. But what I learned in watching others that have that trait is they listen intensely and

Listen more, speak less. I can't say I have mastered it myself either. But what I learned in watching others that have that trait is they listen intensely and then respond appropriately with as few words as needed. I am working on the as few words as needed, but that's my two cents. As for what to look for. Honestly, there are probably some books, but I don't have any recommendations. Instead I'd say, try speaking less, listen more and only say something when you have a point or a reason to speak. And try to be concise and to the point. That is probably 90% of the entire thing you are seeking.