3 ms·

Bank of America Patent Application #20140229239 – “Face Retirement Tool”

51 points by Magicstatic 11y ago

teraflop 11y ago
"Computer program code/computer-readable instructions for carrying out operations of embodiments of the present invention may be written in an object oriented, scripted or unscripted programming language such as Java, Pearl, Smalltalk, C++ or the like." Searching for the phrase "java pearl smalltalk" reveals that BoA has been copy-and-pasting the same text into a number of other patent applications without proofreading it.
- michaelmior 11y ago
  I've also never heard the word "unscripted" used to describe a programming language.
  - 0x0 11y ago
    I've also never heard of a "Pearl" programming language
    - aroman 11y ago
      Man, that's just embarrassing.
      - mfisher87 11y ago
        If you're embarrassed by everything you haven't heard of, sure...
    - ikeboy 11y ago
      Here you go: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PEARL_(programming_language) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PEARL_(programming_language)
    - infinitone 11y ago
      I hope that was sarcastic :)
      - cms07 11y ago
        Why? I don't know of anything named Pearl. I know of Perl, but not Pearl.
- ndonnellan 11y ago
  "...unscripted programming language..." Is that like impromptu programming?
  - slater 11y ago
    Just in time!
  - zachrose 11y ago
    It's when your program is a bag of values and side effects, with one interface that does something.
    - ForHackernews 11y ago
      Malbolge? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malbolge https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malbolge
  - logicallee 11y ago
    No, but you just assigned a name to a programming paradigm that has been on my mind for ten years. EDIT: since two of you asked. it's not a big deal, just that you should be able to use "it", "this" or "that" with your IDE and interactively (unscripted, or impromptu) get it to name your long variables. Likewise for what you mean by functions and so forth. Then you could say somethinhg like, "Siri, double the value before you pass it to the function, then take what it returns and if it is greater than zero...." and it should be able to make some guesses as to which C++ block you meant. (i.e. present you 4-8 variations or interactively ask you, "Did you mean if the first value is greater than zero, or if the value the function returns is greater than zero?" Then after all that your impromptu session is not saved, only the one you ended up selecting is. It's sort-of like Googling for code, but with the difference that the machine makes all sorts of different guesses, and you just pick the one you mean. (When you Google for code you're doing practically the same thing, entering a tree where you descend first by which link you click in the search results, and next by which answer you select on the page...) I still think it must be faster than typing, but until there is an unscripted/impromptu programming environment we'll just have to wait to see....
thomasfoster96 11y ago
So what's going to happen to the several dozen 'age my face' apps on the App Store?
- teraflop 11y ago
  Unless they also include "retirement tools", nothing.
maxmcd 11y ago
From purely a product standpoint, this seems like quite a depressing tool.
- Idiocracy 11y ago
  > From purely a product standpoint, this seems like quite a depressing tool. Why is that?
- Idiocracy 11y ago
  I came back here to check on this comment (since it was an empty comment, that's why I prompted you with "why") And in doing so I saw the rather nice (entirely unlike the passive aggressive nature of reddit) notice to read the approach to comments. Two points I liked: Upvote what is substantial. Make substantial comments. What would have been better is "consider using the word 'because' in your comments", because people don't (see what I did there?) But then I saw something I didn't like. The whole "what you would say face to face". You know why? Some idiot tried to use what I suspect is this very "rule" as a fallacy for a comment I made on reddit. The people running this have some ideas, but they are half baked.
RedLeg 11y ago
Title is misleading. It's not a patent, rather it's a published patent application. But, yeah, it's dumb...
- mkoryak 11y ago
  why is it dumb? There has been studies about how people make better decisions about the future if they can see their future self, otherwise people treat their future self as "some other dude/gal". as if your future self is "another person" that can deal with whatever happens, and its really not much of your concern.
  - rrherr 11y ago
    "That's a problem for Future Homer. Man, I don't envy that guy." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQvvmT3ab80 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQvvmT3ab80
  - RedLeg 11y ago
    I respect your opinion and don't question the alleged research. But, I personally can't imagine being persuaded to invest in an IRA based on a gimmicky face aging tool. See aerovistae's above comment on the real world application.
cheriot 11y ago
The hard part of long term planing is making it immediate enough to act now... and getting sued over a ridiculous patent seems like a resume builder.
dikaiosune 11y ago
I guess John Wick owes some license fees. Who comes up with these descriptions? I can't possibly imagine what "face retirement" means, and even after reading the description it's not a whole lot clearer.
- anigbrowl 11y ago
  As in 'we help you face retirement,' I suppose. I on the other hand, immediately thought of the Blade Runner sense of the word. Probably a good thing I don't have webcam installed and won't be gunning for my future self as a result.
asah 11y ago
IANAL but this screams "business method" patent, i.e. unlikely to get issued: https://www.google.com/search?q="business+method"+patent https://www.google.com/search?q="business+method"+patent aside: IMHO it's a great idea!!! hats off, BofA!
- RedLeg 11y ago
  IAAL. Yep, it has been initially classified by the USPTO as belonging to class 705, which is for business methods.
monochromatic 11y ago
Not actually a patent (at least, not yet). This is a pre-grant publication of a patent application.
kristopolous 11y ago
The background on this: http://www.dangoldstein.com/papers/Hershfield_Goldstein_et_al_Increasing_Saving_Behavior_Age_Progressed_Renderings_Future_Self.pdf http://www.dangoldstein.com/papers/Hershfield_Goldstein_et_a...
- mturmon 11y ago
  I am bemused. I viscerally don't like it, but I can't justify the magnitude of my distaste. The paper quotes Proust with a straight face. But then there is also the happy/sad slider of Figure 4. Major whiplash. It's a combination of extreme, even admirable, erudition and a very hokey experimental setup designed to quantify the obvious.
pwg 11y ago
Title should be changed - this is not a patent, this is a published application. Note the second line of the table of data on the google page: "Publication type Application" It could, someday, after being examined, become a patent, but it is not yet a patent.
andrewchambers 11y ago
New Zealand has gotten rid of software patents, seems like a good idea.
- arfar 11y ago
  It's not as clear cut as that. It's just down to the wording of your claims as to whether your invention is software or not. The question that needs to be asked is whether the claimed invention involves the production of some commercially useful effect. If so, then even if it's using software to achieve that, it will be patentable.
patio11 11y ago
http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/ http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/ <-- you can play with it here.
- sergiotapia 11y ago
  Stuck for me on: "Photo aging in progress. Please stand by..."
  - tomtomau 11y ago
    Forever young
- tracker1 11y ago
  It's a really crappy overlay, there doesn't seem to be any detection at all... I would think that using one of the "render your face as 3d" tools then aging that would probably work better than this thing... Definitely not something unique or anything but conventional.
- scintill76 11y ago
  I got redirected here: http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/no-flash/ http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/no-flash/ I thought I'd had enough of cutesy error messages, but actually got a laugh out of "The future runs on Adobe Flash®. Not really, but this site does."
_lce0 11y ago
This is already a free app on the Android store, I'll bet my wage that there are tons in iOS ecosystem as well. are they really filling patents based on the work of these free ad-supported apps' developers? Seems like thinking to create a troll patent is not even required!
aerovistae 11y ago
I remember SEEING this in action on their site. It was VERY quickly taken down. It was absolutely horrible-- a bit scary and felt like nothing more than a gimmick, seemed really unprofessional. Something you would expect to see on Newgrounds long before a world-class banking website.
deleted 11y ago
[deleted]
fu9ar 11y ago
I hate this more than these words can convey.
swasheck 11y ago
was expecting a nick cage movie sequel ... all i got was this retirement patent.
sbanjo 11y ago
Looks like it was launched a few years ago, according to this press release - wonder how it is doing/how many images Bank of America has saved of people. http://newsroom.bankofamerica.com/press-release/consumer-banking/merrill-edge-launches-face-retirement http://newsroom.bankofamerica.com/press-release/consumer-ban...

51 points by Magicstatic 11y ago

"Computer program code/computer-readable instructions for carrying out operations of embodiments of the present invention may be written in an object oriented, scripted or unscripted programming language such as Java, Pearl, Smalltalk, C++ or the like." Searching for the phrase "java pearl smalltalk" reveals that BoA has been copy-and-pasting the same text into a number of other patent applications without proofreading it.

michaelmior 11y ago
I've also never heard the word "unscripted" used to describe a programming language.
- 0x0 11y ago
  I've also never heard of a "Pearl" programming language
  - aroman 11y ago
    Man, that's just embarrassing.
    - mfisher87 11y ago
      If you're embarrassed by everything you haven't heard of, sure...
  - ikeboy 11y ago
    Here you go: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PEARL_(programming_language) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PEARL_(programming_language)
  - infinitone 11y ago
    I hope that was sarcastic :)
    - cms07 11y ago
      Why? I don't know of anything named Pearl. I know of Perl, but not Pearl.
ndonnellan 11y ago
"...unscripted programming language..." Is that like impromptu programming?
- slater 11y ago
  Just in time!
- zachrose 11y ago
  It's when your program is a bag of values and side effects, with one interface that does something.
  - ForHackernews 11y ago
    Malbolge? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malbolge https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malbolge
- logicallee 11y ago
  No, but you just assigned a name to a programming paradigm that has been on my mind for ten years. EDIT: since two of you asked. it's not a big deal, just that you should be able to use "it", "this" or "that" with your IDE and interactively (unscripted, or impromptu) get it to name your long variables. Likewise for what you mean by functions and so forth. Then you could say somethinhg like, "Siri, double the value before you pass it to the function, then take what it returns and if it is greater than zero...." and it should be able to make some guesses as to which C++ block you meant. (i.e. present you 4-8 variations or interactively ask you, "Did you mean if the first value is greater than zero, or if the value the function returns is greater than zero?" Then after all that your impromptu session is not saved, only the one you ended up selecting is. It's sort-of like Googling for code, but with the difference that the machine makes all sorts of different guesses, and you just pick the one you mean. (When you Google for code you're doing practically the same thing, entering a tree where you descend first by which link you click in the search results, and next by which answer you select on the page...) I still think it must be faster than typing, but until there is an unscripted/impromptu programming environment we'll just have to wait to see....

thomasfoster96 11y ago

So what's going to happen to the several dozen 'age my face' apps on the App Store?

teraflop 11y ago
Unless they also include "retirement tools", nothing.

maxmcd 11y ago

From purely a product standpoint, this seems like quite a depressing tool.

Idiocracy 11y ago
> From purely a product standpoint, this seems like quite a depressing tool. Why is that?
Idiocracy 11y ago
I came back here to check on this comment (since it was an empty comment, that's why I prompted you with "why") And in doing so I saw the rather nice (entirely unlike the passive aggressive nature of reddit) notice to read the approach to comments. Two points I liked: Upvote what is substantial. Make substantial comments. What would have been better is "consider using the word 'because' in your comments", because people don't (see what I did there?) But then I saw something I didn't like. The whole "what you would say face to face". You know why? Some idiot tried to use what I suspect is this very "rule" as a fallacy for a comment I made on reddit. The people running this have some ideas, but they are half baked.

RedLeg 11y ago

Title is misleading. It's not a patent, rather it's a published patent application. But, yeah, it's dumb...

mkoryak 11y ago
why is it dumb? There has been studies about how people make better decisions about the future if they can see their future self, otherwise people treat their future self as "some other dude/gal". as if your future self is "another person" that can deal with whatever happens, and its really not much of your concern.
- rrherr 11y ago
  "That's a problem for Future Homer. Man, I don't envy that guy." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQvvmT3ab80 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQvvmT3ab80
- RedLeg 11y ago
  I respect your opinion and don't question the alleged research. But, I personally can't imagine being persuaded to invest in an IRA based on a gimmicky face aging tool. See aerovistae's above comment on the real world application.

cheriot 11y ago

The hard part of long term planing is making it immediate enough to act now... and getting sued over a ridiculous patent seems like a resume builder.

dikaiosune 11y ago

I guess John Wick owes some license fees. Who comes up with these descriptions? I can't possibly imagine what "face retirement" means, and even after reading the description it's not a whole lot clearer.

anigbrowl 11y ago
As in 'we help you face retirement,' I suppose. I on the other hand, immediately thought of the Blade Runner sense of the word. Probably a good thing I don't have webcam installed and won't be gunning for my future self as a result.

asah 11y ago

IANAL but this screams "business method" patent, i.e. unlikely to get issued: https://www.google.com/search?q="business+method"+patent https://www.google.com/search?q="business+method"+patent aside: IMHO it's a great idea!!! hats off, BofA!

RedLeg 11y ago
IAAL. Yep, it has been initially classified by the USPTO as belonging to class 705, which is for business methods.

monochromatic 11y ago

Not actually a patent (at least, not yet). This is a pre-grant publication of a patent application.

kristopolous 11y ago

The background on this: http://www.dangoldstein.com/papers/Hershfield_Goldstein_et_al_Increasing_Saving_Behavior_Age_Progressed_Renderings_Future_Self.pdf http://www.dangoldstein.com/papers/Hershfield_Goldstein_et_a...

mturmon 11y ago
I am bemused. I viscerally don't like it, but I can't justify the magnitude of my distaste. The paper quotes Proust with a straight face. But then there is also the happy/sad slider of Figure 4. Major whiplash. It's a combination of extreme, even admirable, erudition and a very hokey experimental setup designed to quantify the obvious.

pwg 11y ago

Title should be changed - this is not a patent, this is a published application. Note the second line of the table of data on the google page: "Publication type Application" It could, someday, after being examined, become a patent, but it is not yet a patent.

andrewchambers 11y ago

New Zealand has gotten rid of software patents, seems like a good idea.

arfar 11y ago
It's not as clear cut as that. It's just down to the wording of your claims as to whether your invention is software or not. The question that needs to be asked is whether the claimed invention involves the production of some commercially useful effect. If so, then even if it's using software to achieve that, it will be patentable.

patio11 11y ago

http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/ http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/ <-- you can play with it here.

sergiotapia 11y ago
Stuck for me on: "Photo aging in progress. Please stand by..."
- tomtomau 11y ago
  Forever young
tracker1 11y ago
It's a really crappy overlay, there doesn't seem to be any detection at all... I would think that using one of the "render your face as 3d" tools then aging that would probably work better than this thing... Definitely not something unique or anything but conventional.
scintill76 11y ago
I got redirected here: http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/no-flash/ http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/no-flash/ I thought I'd had enough of cutesy error messages, but actually got a laugh out of "The future runs on Adobe Flash®. Not really, but this site does."

_lce0 11y ago

This is already a free app on the Android store, I'll bet my wage that there are tons in iOS ecosystem as well. are they really filling patents based on the work of these free ad-supported apps' developers? Seems like thinking to create a troll patent is not even required!

aerovistae 11y ago

I remember SEEING this in action on their site. It was VERY quickly taken down. It was absolutely horrible-- a bit scary and felt like nothing more than a gimmick, seemed really unprofessional. Something you would expect to see on Newgrounds long before a world-class banking website.

deleted 11y ago

[deleted]

fu9ar 11y ago

I hate this more than these words can convey.

swasheck 11y ago

was expecting a nick cage movie sequel ... all i got was this retirement patent.

sbanjo 11y ago

Looks like it was launched a few years ago, according to this press release - wonder how it is doing/how many images Bank of America has saved of people. http://newsroom.bankofamerica.com/press-release/consumer-banking/merrill-edge-launches-face-retirement http://newsroom.bankofamerica.com/press-release/consumer-ban...