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> But I don't like the thought that as soon as you have a child, you instantly have to be defined by that. I'm glad you brought this up. There's nothing that's

> But I don't like the thought that as soon as you have a child, you instantly have to be defined by that. I'm glad you brought this up. There's nothing that's forced upon you, you are not defined by this. It just happens so that most people change their priorities voluntarily and happily when they have a child. I personally continue pursuing professional success, of course. The difference is that if I become unsuccessful for any reason then the world won't collapse. So it just becomes much less important.

jkestner 12y ago
Yeah, it wasn't transformative like a bolt of lightning. And I didn't instantly become one of those people who freaks out about all the parenting advice, things that might choke a baby, statistically insignificant ways of dying. I was easy-going before, still am. You may lose finite things like time, but not your identity. Parenthood only uncovers more of it.