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I think travel as a universal solution for everyone and every problem is clearly overdone. Having said that, I'm assuming you are introverted. You probably wou

I think travel as a universal solution for everyone and every problem is clearly overdone. Having said that, I'm assuming you are introverted. You probably would have had a better experience traveling in a pair with a highly extroverted friend who can break the ice with other people for you then bring you into the fold. Just a thought.

kosma 12y ago
It's not the travel itself that matters, but the challenges and new perspectives that it brings. You won't get an epiphany on an all-inclusive trip; and I've seen people relocate across the globe and continue to live the same life they had back in their home countries. Trying to solve anything by running away is just that - escaping. It may work for a while, but at some point you'll have to stop and face your demons. PS. It's not a matter of introversion, as I know plenty of introverts who can strike up a conversation with a stranger. I can't, no matter how hard I try - and it gets awkward pretty fast if I try too hard. And yes, having social "guide" around does help - but it always feels like being a burden.
- personlurking 12y ago
  > and I've seen people relocate across the globe and continue to live the same life they had back in their home countries. I see what you're getting at but there are also four cost-prohibitive things in the US that are important to life. They are: Housing (cost of renting or buying), healthcare (free or cheap in a lot of countries), higher education (free or cheap in a lot of countries) and the ability to have a social life when you don't have a lot of extra funds. In the places I've lived, I've had all four of these things at all times and it's changed my lifestyle and my life. When a 1 bedroom apt is a few hundred per month, university is a few thousand, a semi-serious trip to the hospital including ambulance & meds is $20, and a really fun night out (drinks included) costs $10...it can really change one's life. I should add transportation to that, too, since I've been to some amazing places (near cities I've lived in) for $2-3 round-trip.
- butwhy 12y ago
  You say it isn't a problem of introversion; I say it is. It 99% is. What you have described is absolutely the opposite of travel experiences I have. Once you solve the introversion part, you will absolutely have a great time, meet amazing people and do really enjoyable things. Funnily enough, we seem to have taken very different roads. Travelling was the the thing that actually turned me from being semi introverted to not being introverted at all. Hostels are great in that they put me in touch with very extroverted people and showed me how easy it is to approach people, as most are friendly and welcoming. Once you get that down, you then hang out with people, go on pub crawls, go sight seeing or on road trips together etc. "It's not a matter of introversion, as I know plenty of introverts who can strike up a conversation with a stranger. I can't, no matter how hard I try" - this sounds disillusion. Perhaps you should look up what being an introvert entails. What you have just described is a person that's less introverted than you. Being introverted occurs at different levels in everyone. You having a lot of trouble talking to people actually means that you're more introverted than him. If you think it is something else, then what is your diagnosis? Do you have a physical speech impairment that prevents you from talking? "Trying to solve anything by running away is just that - escaping" - so what? You "escape" into a totally different lifestyle to make new relationships, enjoy new activities and cultures, and ultimately change your life. It can be a permanent "escape" for some.
  - iman453 12y ago
    Introversion isn't an inability to talk to strangers. Like OP suggested, plenty of introverts can strike up conversations with strangers and even be 'the life of the party', so to speak. Most introverts though tire out with excessive social interaction, specially interactions comprising primarily of small talk, and need some alone time doing activities they enjoy to recharge. On the other hand, meaningful, deep conversations that go beyond talking about the weather with strangers would probably energize an introvert. Being unable to initiate conversations with strangers can be shyness/mild social phobia, or something else, which you probably mean when you refer to introversion. Susan Cain's book Quiet, does a good job of explaining introversion. Her TED talk is a sort of cliffnotes version of the book: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0KYU2j0TM4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0KYU2j0TM4
- lugg 12y ago
  As a rather introverted individual with a lot of issues when it comes to striking up conversation. I find I'm actually really good at it, but I need to say that first word before anything happens. The only advice I could give is similar to ferris' 4 hour work week advice, start small and practice. If you can't ask someone for the time, a lighter, or for directions you won't be able to walk up to a cute girl and say "hi". So start with those small every day questions anyone should feel comfortable being asked by a stranger. Even if you know exactly what time it is and where you are, this doesn't matter. Also as a helper, ask people you aren't intimidated by, a non female, an older person etc etc. Once you're comfortable with those things, start by randomly smiling at people, then start saying hi. Then start saying more. You'll get a few people who ask you to not, walk away, or look at you weird but that's ok, its all part of it. Remember you will never see these people again.
nemo1618 12y ago
Absolutely agree. As an introvert, I knew myself well enough to bring along an extroverted friend when I chose to venture into the unknown. He was a total life-saver; the trip would have been a disaster otherwise.
mhomde 12y ago
Taking along a friend is good advice in general. It can become a little bit exhausting to constantly have somewhat shallow interactions meeting only meet new people. Sometimes you just want to lay back and enjoy the deeper relation of someone that know you well. Having a friend as an anchor and fixed point for discussions and sharing experiences can make it much more rewarding. Unfortunately it's pretty rare to have a friend with as much freedom as oneself at the same point in time. Also I must say that if you travel and stay for 3+ months in a place you face a different problem: You've gone past some kind of threshold and started to create a new life with friends, favorite places and habits. Leaving can then feel a little bit like you're leaving shards of yourself behind, and the physical disconnection of all those new relationships can be quite sad too.

kosma 12y ago

It's not the travel itself that matters, but the challenges and new perspectives that it brings. You won't get an epiphany on an all-inclusive trip; and I've seen people relocate across the globe and continue to live the same life they had back in their home countries. Trying to solve anything by running away is just that - escaping. It may work for a while, but at some point you'll have to stop and face your demons. PS. It's not a matter of introversion, as I know plenty of introverts who can strike up a conversation with a stranger. I can't, no matter how hard I try - and it gets awkward pretty fast if I try too hard. And yes, having social "guide" around does help - but it always feels like being a burden.

personlurking 12y ago
> and I've seen people relocate across the globe and continue to live the same life they had back in their home countries. I see what you're getting at but there are also four cost-prohibitive things in the US that are important to life. They are: Housing (cost of renting or buying), healthcare (free or cheap in a lot of countries), higher education (free or cheap in a lot of countries) and the ability to have a social life when you don't have a lot of extra funds. In the places I've lived, I've had all four of these things at all times and it's changed my lifestyle and my life. When a 1 bedroom apt is a few hundred per month, university is a few thousand, a semi-serious trip to the hospital including ambulance & meds is $20, and a really fun night out (drinks included) costs $10...it can really change one's life. I should add transportation to that, too, since I've been to some amazing places (near cities I've lived in) for $2-3 round-trip.
butwhy 12y ago
You say it isn't a problem of introversion; I say it is. It 99% is. What you have described is absolutely the opposite of travel experiences I have. Once you solve the introversion part, you will absolutely have a great time, meet amazing people and do really enjoyable things. Funnily enough, we seem to have taken very different roads. Travelling was the the thing that actually turned me from being semi introverted to not being introverted at all. Hostels are great in that they put me in touch with very extroverted people and showed me how easy it is to approach people, as most are friendly and welcoming. Once you get that down, you then hang out with people, go on pub crawls, go sight seeing or on road trips together etc. "It's not a matter of introversion, as I know plenty of introverts who can strike up a conversation with a stranger. I can't, no matter how hard I try" - this sounds disillusion. Perhaps you should look up what being an introvert entails. What you have just described is a person that's less introverted than you. Being introverted occurs at different levels in everyone. You having a lot of trouble talking to people actually means that you're more introverted than him. If you think it is something else, then what is your diagnosis? Do you have a physical speech impairment that prevents you from talking? "Trying to solve anything by running away is just that - escaping" - so what? You "escape" into a totally different lifestyle to make new relationships, enjoy new activities and cultures, and ultimately change your life. It can be a permanent "escape" for some.
- iman453 12y ago
  Introversion isn't an inability to talk to strangers. Like OP suggested, plenty of introverts can strike up conversations with strangers and even be 'the life of the party', so to speak. Most introverts though tire out with excessive social interaction, specially interactions comprising primarily of small talk, and need some alone time doing activities they enjoy to recharge. On the other hand, meaningful, deep conversations that go beyond talking about the weather with strangers would probably energize an introvert. Being unable to initiate conversations with strangers can be shyness/mild social phobia, or something else, which you probably mean when you refer to introversion. Susan Cain's book Quiet, does a good job of explaining introversion. Her TED talk is a sort of cliffnotes version of the book: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0KYU2j0TM4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0KYU2j0TM4
lugg 12y ago
As a rather introverted individual with a lot of issues when it comes to striking up conversation. I find I'm actually really good at it, but I need to say that first word before anything happens. The only advice I could give is similar to ferris' 4 hour work week advice, start small and practice. If you can't ask someone for the time, a lighter, or for directions you won't be able to walk up to a cute girl and say "hi". So start with those small every day questions anyone should feel comfortable being asked by a stranger. Even if you know exactly what time it is and where you are, this doesn't matter. Also as a helper, ask people you aren't intimidated by, a non female, an older person etc etc. Once you're comfortable with those things, start by randomly smiling at people, then start saying hi. Then start saying more. You'll get a few people who ask you to not, walk away, or look at you weird but that's ok, its all part of it. Remember you will never see these people again.

nemo1618 12y ago

Absolutely agree. As an introvert, I knew myself well enough to bring along an extroverted friend when I chose to venture into the unknown. He was a total life-saver; the trip would have been a disaster otherwise.

mhomde 12y ago

Taking along a friend is good advice in general. It can become a little bit exhausting to constantly have somewhat shallow interactions meeting only meet new people. Sometimes you just want to lay back and enjoy the deeper relation of someone that know you well. Having a friend as an anchor and fixed point for discussions and sharing experiences can make it much more rewarding. Unfortunately it's pretty rare to have a friend with as much freedom as oneself at the same point in time. Also I must say that if you travel and stay for 3+ months in a place you face a different problem: You've gone past some kind of threshold and started to create a new life with friends, favorite places and habits. Leaving can then feel a little bit like you're leaving shards of yourself behind, and the physical disconnection of all those new relationships can be quite sad too.