3 ms·

There's a danger in humorlessness in that it often insinuates itself into one's identity through piousness and victimhood. Fear of a blow can weaken and damage

There's a danger in humorlessness in that it often insinuates itself into one's identity through piousness and victimhood. Fear of a blow can weaken and damage us far more than the blow itself. Now, mental health treatment doesn't have to mean clinical care. Sometimes it's being encouraged to get more familiar with your coworkers, or just helping them get to know you better. Teasing is often just that, trying to include a person or express comfort with them, and when someone reacts badly or isn't honest about things, blowing up or bottling up, those are usually indications of poor expression or self control, which could be more serious and compromising issues. So yes, if the person is unable to bring themself to confront their peers, clearly relay their wishes, and broker an understanding, they may need some help (ie- treatment) to realize that they can, should, and how. Mental health, like physical health, is something we have to work at to maintain and improve our entire lives. Saying all of our thoughts and emotions are reasonable and perfect by default because why else would they be any other way is about as sensible as the idea that morbid obesity is healthy and natural because why else would our bodies be able to be that way other than by design? We have choices, we have volition, but do we have the motivation?

dalke 12y ago
"Humorlessness"? Are you one of those people who think that the targets of harassment have to just laugh it off? Have you read about Oncale v. Sundowner Offshore Services? > On several occasions, Oncale was forcibly subjected to sex-related, humiliating actions against him by Lyons, Pippen and Johnson in the presence of the rest of the crew. Pippen and Lyons also physically assulted Oncale in a sexual manner, and Lyons threatened him with rape. > Oncale’s complaints to supervisory personnel produced no remedial action; in fact, the company’s Safety Compliance Clerk, Valent Hohen, told Oncale that Lyons and Pippen “picked [on] him all the time too,” and called him a name suggesting homosexuality. The original court decision held there was no EEOC violation here, as all participants were heterosexual males. Was that humorlessness on Oncale's part? Surely no. At least, I don't find multiple and serious rape threats against me. Do you? Should Oncale have worked harder to become more familiar with his coworkers? Was Oncale at fault for "poor expression or self control", which somehow justified this behavior? Surely no. Should Oncale have instead worked more on maintaining his personal mental health? Going back to my scenario, "I" confronted my peers but nothing changed. I curiously note that you seem to blame the victim, and require the victim of unwanted "humor" to be inordinately capable of people management. Why aren't the peers in my situation the ones who need mental health treatment? Why do you think Oncale deserved being 'teased' with threats of rape?

dalke 12y ago

"Humorlessness"? Are you one of those people who think that the targets of harassment have to just laugh it off? Have you read about Oncale v. Sundowner Offshore Services? > On several occasions, Oncale was forcibly subjected to sex-related, humiliating actions against him by Lyons, Pippen and Johnson in the presence of the rest of the crew. Pippen and Lyons also physically assulted Oncale in a sexual manner, and Lyons threatened him with rape. > Oncale’s complaints to supervisory personnel produced no remedial action; in fact, the company’s Safety Compliance Clerk, Valent Hohen, told Oncale that Lyons and Pippen “picked [on] him all the time too,” and called him a name suggesting homosexuality. The original court decision held there was no EEOC violation here, as all participants were heterosexual males. Was that humorlessness on Oncale's part? Surely no. At least, I don't find multiple and serious rape threats against me. Do you? Should Oncale have worked harder to become more familiar with his coworkers? Was Oncale at fault for "poor expression or self control", which somehow justified this behavior? Surely no. Should Oncale have instead worked more on maintaining his personal mental health? Going back to my scenario, "I" confronted my peers but nothing changed. I curiously note that you seem to blame the victim, and require the victim of unwanted "humor" to be inordinately capable of people management. Why aren't the peers in my situation the ones who need mental health treatment? Why do you think Oncale deserved being 'teased' with threats of rape?