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>the first step to good conversation is being genuinely interested in other people's interests I'm skeptical of this advice. Coleridge was one of the most famo

• beat 12y ago
  That's a good point. Frankly, I'm more of a talker than a listener myself. But that said, I really do find other people's interests to be interesting and valuable to me. Part of "being interesting yourself" is being aware of when your listeners are and are not interested. That is itself a listening skill. If you can educate and entertain, wonderful! But to do that, you have to be continually aware of your listener's attention. That can be really difficult for the talkative extrovert. You're really on point, though - the balance of a conversation has to be mutually agreed by the conversationalists. It doesn't have to be equal, and probably shouldn't be. And, since most people aren't really good at conversation, being the one who is good, who is interesting and sensitive, can be a relief to others.