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Uhm, I’m real confused. Why do you talk about “try to join nerd communities” with regard to the dongle thing? Do you know something we don’t? That seems more l

by arrrg 12y ago

Uhm, I’m real confused. Why do you talk about “try to join nerd communities” with regard to the dongle thing? Do you know something we don’t? That seems more like a policy of exclusion from your side – ala obviously a real nerd wouldn’t ever find something inappropriate or be clumsy in how they complain about something. This whole thing is a way of cordoning yourself off, isolating yourself from criticism, shunning others, excluding others. It’s so, so weird. And hateful.

moonshinefe 12y ago
Speak for yourself, it was clear to me what he meant and you're putting words in his mouth.
amirmc 12y ago
I feel there's a lot of 'no true Scotsman' in the article and throughout the comments here.
hyperion2010 12y ago
I can't tell if your last line is flagged with /s but all I will say that it perfectly illustrate the lack of tolerance that drives nerds away. I'm going to generalize here. The description of nerd withdrawal that you give actively implies that the nerd has aggressively attacked someone by TRYING NOT TO BE SEEN. The nerd is trying to avoid conflict because it is a giant waste of time and frankly is pretty depressing. This behavior is the interpreted exactly as your last line reads as "hateful" and "weird." This interpretation leads to a personal attack from the afflicted whereas the nerd was simply trying to avoid any of this. It is like saying that nerds should know better when the stereotype that is forced upon them (often correctly) is that they are often utterly unaware of their affect on other people. That the afflicted does not have the empathy to recognize the crippling social ineptness (in the eyes of appropriate society) of the nerd leads to directed attacks (often call bullying in the rest of the world). When a nerd withdraws it is directed at no one. I am NOT giving the nerd an out for bad behavior. I am saying that nerds often speak their minds without stopping to check who is listening because they don't do the primate thing of checking to see who is going to beat their ass every time they speak and they intentionally formed their own society so they didn't have to. Most nerds will apologize if someone reminds them that other people near by might not feel comfortable hearing certain discussions, but don't be surprised if some of them ask why that someone was listening in the first place. tl;dr Generalization: Nerd withdrawal is rarely directed at anyone, it is a defence mechanism. Responses to nerd withdrawal or nerds expressing themselves (in their blithely unaware way) are often direct attacks on the nerd. This asymmetry is what drives me nuts.
hueving 12y ago
Some scumbag got a guy fired by publicly shaming him on twitter for making a joke to his friend in a private conversation. That is one of the most hostile, weird, and hateful ways I've ever seen someone behave. It's a perfect example of counter-productive, oppressive behavior that was outlined in this article. Do you think getting that guy fired is going to suddenly change his sense of humor? Not likely. If anything, it's going to poison his view of feminists in the field by coloring them all as psychopaths willing to do anything to push an agenda rather than focus on the actual technology the community was originally built around.
- Potando 12y ago
  Hold on. The only scumbag that got the guy fired was his employer. Will your boss fire you if you get harassed on Twitter?
  - hueving 12y ago
    Yes, if someone launches an Internet lynch mob of social justice warriors at me that threatens the business, of course I would be fired. No company wants to be perceived as "the place that employs the most-hated sexist in the world" if they depend on selling to regular people. An Internet lynch mob can ruin SE rankings, launch DDoS attacks, etc. Anything that attracts one is a liability.
    - throwaway9324 12y ago
      It would never have reached the proportions it did if it wasn't for all the people "defending" the guy and then keep bringing it up time and time again to make an argument.
      - reitanqild 12y ago
        You got it kind of backwards. He was already fired by the time the "East side of Internet" reacted. As for this being brought up again and again: it is a very good example and I can't recall the person in question ever coming up with a real apology.

by arrrg 12y ago

moonshinefe 12y ago

Speak for yourself, it was clear to me what he meant and you're putting words in his mouth.

amirmc 12y ago

I feel there's a lot of 'no true Scotsman' in the article and throughout the comments here.

hyperion2010 12y ago

I can't tell if your last line is flagged with /s but all I will say that it perfectly illustrate the lack of tolerance that drives nerds away. I'm going to generalize here. The description of nerd withdrawal that you give actively implies that the nerd has aggressively attacked someone by TRYING NOT TO BE SEEN. The nerd is trying to avoid conflict because it is a giant waste of time and frankly is pretty depressing. This behavior is the interpreted exactly as your last line reads as "hateful" and "weird." This interpretation leads to a personal attack from the afflicted whereas the nerd was simply trying to avoid any of this. It is like saying that nerds should know better when the stereotype that is forced upon them (often correctly) is that they are often utterly unaware of their affect on other people. That the afflicted does not have the empathy to recognize the crippling social ineptness (in the eyes of appropriate society) of the nerd leads to directed attacks (often call bullying in the rest of the world). When a nerd withdraws it is directed at no one. I am NOT giving the nerd an out for bad behavior. I am saying that nerds often speak their minds without stopping to check who is listening because they don't do the primate thing of checking to see who is going to beat their ass every time they speak and they intentionally formed their own society so they didn't have to. Most nerds will apologize if someone reminds them that other people near by might not feel comfortable hearing certain discussions, but don't be surprised if some of them ask why that someone was listening in the first place. tl;dr Generalization: Nerd withdrawal is rarely directed at anyone, it is a defence mechanism. Responses to nerd withdrawal or nerds expressing themselves (in their blithely unaware way) are often direct attacks on the nerd. This asymmetry is what drives me nuts.

hueving 12y ago

Some scumbag got a guy fired by publicly shaming him on twitter for making a joke to his friend in a private conversation. That is one of the most hostile, weird, and hateful ways I've ever seen someone behave. It's a perfect example of counter-productive, oppressive behavior that was outlined in this article. Do you think getting that guy fired is going to suddenly change his sense of humor? Not likely. If anything, it's going to poison his view of feminists in the field by coloring them all as psychopaths willing to do anything to push an agenda rather than focus on the actual technology the community was originally built around.

Potando 12y ago
Hold on. The only scumbag that got the guy fired was his employer. Will your boss fire you if you get harassed on Twitter?
- hueving 12y ago
  Yes, if someone launches an Internet lynch mob of social justice warriors at me that threatens the business, of course I would be fired. No company wants to be perceived as "the place that employs the most-hated sexist in the world" if they depend on selling to regular people. An Internet lynch mob can ruin SE rankings, launch DDoS attacks, etc. Anything that attracts one is a liability.
  - throwaway9324 12y ago
    It would never have reached the proportions it did if it wasn't for all the people "defending" the guy and then keep bringing it up time and time again to make an argument.
    - reitanqild 12y ago
      You got it kind of backwards. He was already fired by the time the "East side of Internet" reacted. As for this being brought up again and again: it is a very good example and I can't recall the person in question ever coming up with a real apology.