If this is the way you feel I do highly suggest focusing on counseling, seeking an additional counselor for a second opinion, possibly seeking medication (thing

If this is the way you feel I do highly suggest focusing on counseling, seeking an additional counselor for a second opinion, possibly seeking medication (things that can make you feel less depressed, anxious, etc). Unfortunately as others have stated the majority of hackers are going to know logical responses. Since yours is that of irrational fear, it becomes difficult for anyone but a trained professional to help you. Unfortunately I don't think this is an avenue except for people that wish it to be, but have you considered reading scripture? Sounds a little crazy but having faith can really change your perception on things. I don't think it's necessary to have a positive outlook on life, but it might help you to gain one. If faith means anything to you the story of job comes to mind. Some people have a knee-jerk reaction to the suggestion of religion so if I've offended you in any way I apologize. I hope you do focus on your counseling and make an effort to focus on friendship or perhaps pursue finding people like you. It may help an order of magnitude just to be able to converse people battling issues similar to yours. I'm not sure how much this forum is frequented but I bet if you dug hard enough you could find something similar to this that may help: http://www.phobias-help.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=21 http://www.phobias-help.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=21