4 ms·

The moment

60 points by dabent 17y ago

wallflower 17y ago
"When you take dancing lessons, you learn steps and you learn steps and you learn steps. It can go on for a long time. And then one day, you just learn to dance, and it is so different." Bill Austin
etherael 17y ago
My moment was playing with "digital toys" all my life, exploring, looking around in wide eyed power mad wonder at all the things I could do with them, and the gradual ascent to mastery of all the various aspects involved with this, achieving satori through technology. Staying there, for a fairly long time, watching the rest of the world with exasperation and contempt, wondering when they would figure it out. Finally realising that this was my part, this was what I could handle for everyone else and make sure they got what they needed from this vast, critical piece of the puzzle that despite constant popular opposition and attempts to pretend like it doesn't matter and would eventually all be handled by swarms of desperate unfortunate identical fleshy automatons in a dark room in some hell hole on the other side of the world. Grasping all of that, understanding that people are what they are and are probably not going to change. Understanding that I am different, and I need to take advantage of the ways in which I am different, and parlaying those abilities to my own advantage. Letting go of emotion.
RevRal 17y ago
My moment happened while I was trying to explain how the statement "all movie critics are stupid" is not true. It occurred to me that no matter how well you write, or how articulate you are, that a good portion of people simply don't have the capacity to understand something as it is. So my Aha! moment came when I realized that communication is like a game of catch. Not only does the speaker need to throw the ball well, but the listener needs to be able to catch the ball well. So, I adjusted my throwing strategy -- instead of repeating the same thing with minor modifications. I explained the similarities between an NFL commentator and a movie critic. That both have experience that makes them credible and respectable and that is why people feel safe reading criticism. And then the person understood! It was amazing. This was a huge moment for me.
frossie 17y ago
The point being made is not bad, but the example of the barmaid is awful. It is not a sign of adulthood or leadership to show compassion to somebody earning pennies to your dollar. It is a sign of improvement in character, which is not the same thing.
- jwhitlark 17y ago
  Hmm. I saw it as a sign of adulthood (fully understanding another's situation), which is required to truly have character (how can you make a truly moral choice if you don't fully understand the situation), which is required for real leadership. Perhaps I'm reading too much into it, though.
  - bootload 17y ago
    "... Perhaps I'm reading too much into it, though. ..." That's a pretty good insight. Understanding someone else requires you get "theory of mind" ~ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_mind http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_mind By understand how to get the best out of somebody by seeing from their point of view. Punishing them for making a simple error would show poor judgment. Owning their failure, leadership. Now if the person didn't learn from this, that's where things get interesting.
jac_no_k 17y ago
The "moment" for me was when the computer turned from a toy to a tool to get things done. No more technology for technology's sake. Now it's which components is best to get to an acceptable solution. There are of course a lot of other "moments." Moving on from being a snobby technical person to realizing it's better to be an enabler for getting things done. Trying to view the world from my child's eyes, to make her world better. Finding that time is very valuable.
philk 17y ago
This seems like a bit of a nothing article. He's just taken a standard thing "when things fall into place", given it a catchy name and then added an almost unrelated anecdote from his life. There's no effort to explain how to achieve "the moment". It's probably quite well received because positive, empty generalities are upbeat and tend to attract kudos. That said I can see the following ways to actually achieve those moments where everything falls into place: 1) Unconscious competence in something - for example leading troops - requires a long period of practice. Hence focused practice on a field of interest should help. Note that in the military example in the article the guy had been spending a lot of time dedicated to learning how to lead troops. He wasn't dabbling and having a go for an hour every month. 2) Focused practice needs to target weak points, or at the very least different things - if you keep doing the same thing over and over you're unlikely to make any progress. 3) A willingness to make mistakes advances you towards competence faster (I recall a previous article on here arguing that people learn and retain much more from their mistakes than from rote learning). Also a fear of making mistakes will keep you from trying new things and hence retard your progress. 4) The ability to accept and get through a long period of incompetence, keep motivated, and keep practicing.

60 points by dabent 17y ago

"When you take dancing lessons, you learn steps and you learn steps and you learn steps. It can go on for a long time. And then one day, you just learn to dance, and it is so different." Bill Austin

etherael 17y ago

My moment was playing with "digital toys" all my life, exploring, looking around in wide eyed power mad wonder at all the things I could do with them, and the gradual ascent to mastery of all the various aspects involved with this, achieving satori through technology. Staying there, for a fairly long time, watching the rest of the world with exasperation and contempt, wondering when they would figure it out. Finally realising that this was my part, this was what I could handle for everyone else and make sure they got what they needed from this vast, critical piece of the puzzle that despite constant popular opposition and attempts to pretend like it doesn't matter and would eventually all be handled by swarms of desperate unfortunate identical fleshy automatons in a dark room in some hell hole on the other side of the world. Grasping all of that, understanding that people are what they are and are probably not going to change. Understanding that I am different, and I need to take advantage of the ways in which I am different, and parlaying those abilities to my own advantage. Letting go of emotion.

RevRal 17y ago

My moment happened while I was trying to explain how the statement "all movie critics are stupid" is not true. It occurred to me that no matter how well you write, or how articulate you are, that a good portion of people simply don't have the capacity to understand something as it is. So my Aha! moment came when I realized that communication is like a game of catch. Not only does the speaker need to throw the ball well, but the listener needs to be able to catch the ball well. So, I adjusted my throwing strategy -- instead of repeating the same thing with minor modifications. I explained the similarities between an NFL commentator and a movie critic. That both have experience that makes them credible and respectable and that is why people feel safe reading criticism. And then the person understood! It was amazing. This was a huge moment for me.

frossie 17y ago

The point being made is not bad, but the example of the barmaid is awful. It is not a sign of adulthood or leadership to show compassion to somebody earning pennies to your dollar. It is a sign of improvement in character, which is not the same thing.

jwhitlark 17y ago
Hmm. I saw it as a sign of adulthood (fully understanding another's situation), which is required to truly have character (how can you make a truly moral choice if you don't fully understand the situation), which is required for real leadership. Perhaps I'm reading too much into it, though.
- bootload 17y ago
  "... Perhaps I'm reading too much into it, though. ..." That's a pretty good insight. Understanding someone else requires you get "theory of mind" ~ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_mind http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_mind By understand how to get the best out of somebody by seeing from their point of view. Punishing them for making a simple error would show poor judgment. Owning their failure, leadership. Now if the person didn't learn from this, that's where things get interesting.

jac_no_k 17y ago

The "moment" for me was when the computer turned from a toy to a tool to get things done. No more technology for technology's sake. Now it's which components is best to get to an acceptable solution. There are of course a lot of other "moments." Moving on from being a snobby technical person to realizing it's better to be an enabler for getting things done. Trying to view the world from my child's eyes, to make her world better. Finding that time is very valuable.

philk 17y ago

This seems like a bit of a nothing article. He's just taken a standard thing "when things fall into place", given it a catchy name and then added an almost unrelated anecdote from his life. There's no effort to explain how to achieve "the moment". It's probably quite well received because positive, empty generalities are upbeat and tend to attract kudos. That said I can see the following ways to actually achieve those moments where everything falls into place: 1) Unconscious competence in something - for example leading troops - requires a long period of practice. Hence focused practice on a field of interest should help. Note that in the military example in the article the guy had been spending a lot of time dedicated to learning how to lead troops. He wasn't dabbling and having a go for an hour every month. 2) Focused practice needs to target weak points, or at the very least different things - if you keep doing the same thing over and over you're unlikely to make any progress. 3) A willingness to make mistakes advances you towards competence faster (I recall a previous article on here arguing that people learn and retain much more from their mistakes than from rote learning). Also a fear of making mistakes will keep you from trying new things and hence retard your progress. 4) The ability to accept and get through a long period of incompetence, keep motivated, and keep practicing.