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http://jezebel.com/5902718/creepy-finance-guy-with-spreadsheet-of-matchcom-prospects-says-he-was-just-trying-to-be-organized http://jezebel.com/5902718/creepy-f

http://jezebel.com/5902718/creepy-finance-guy-with-spreadsheet-of-matchcom-prospects-says-he-was-just-trying-to-be-organized http://jezebel.com/5902718/creepy-finance-guy-with-spreadshe... if this guy's only creepy, what does it make the person who tracks punctuation marks, runs linear regressions, and trains learning algorithm using data collected on dates?

bitwize 12y ago
It's only creepy when men do it. When a woman does it she is just being meticulous about her own interests.
Blackthorn 12y ago
Assuming this is an honest question, the guy is creepy because men preying on women is much more common than the other way around.
- beachstartup 12y ago
  how exactly is going on dates preying?
  - normloman 12y ago
    Nobody's saying that this guy is preying. But the fact that other guys prey makes unusual behavior like this more suspect. Women have to be more careful than guys, since they are more likely to be abused. So naturally, they are more sensitive to unusual behavior. You and I see this spreadsheet and think "this dude's just awkward, but probably harmless." But some women might think "serial killer alert." This is partly because of the media (watch enough dateline and you'll think every man's a kidnapper). But partly because of reality - some men do sick shit, and women are scared. My wife has some stories about past dates she's been on that would repulse you.
    - beachstartup 12y ago
      uh, women also do sick shit to men. it's 2015, being a twisted, terrible human being is now an equal opportunity phenomenon.
      - Blackthorn 12y ago
        It's almost like you didn't even read the thread you're replying to. One of these is much more common than the other.
- tsotha 12y ago
  In what way? What do you mean by "preying"?
majormajor 12y ago
A few differences that seem pretty big: * after-the-fact tracking and analysis vs a sorta in-progress playbook for trying to score * not sharing personal information, and not coming off nearly as judgmental in commenting on individual people—especially in the "not sending it to someone you're interested in and seeing" category, jeeze * sarcasm and jokes are a pretty well-established way of treading on could-be-creepy ground in a less off-putting way Even the Jezebel post itself, with its tracking down and interviewing people in the spreadsheet, is more creepy than this blog post...
tsotha 12y ago
You have to understand what a woman means when she labels a guy "creepy". It just means she's getting attention from someone she doesn't find attractive. If spreadsheet guy looked like Benedict Cumberbatch instead of being "creepy" he'd be, you know, innovative. The kind of guy who thinks outside the box in new and exciting ways. Particularly if he had money.
- normloman 12y ago
  No, he'd still be creepy. Lately, a lot of guys have repeated this misconception about "creepy," -- that it just means you're unattractive, and not genuinely unsettling. I'm sure that shields a lot of guy's egos. And maybe, in some cases, creepy really does mean unattractive. But creepy still has it's other meaning too. That spreadsheet thing would be creepy no matter who did it. Because the guy is trying to approach dating like a math problem (is he socially awkward?). Because he's keeping detailed notes of everyone he's met (who does that?). Because he probably sees women like entries in a spreadsheet.
  - tsotha 12y ago
    Nope. If he were attractive all those things would somehow be positive traits.

bitwize 12y ago

It's only creepy when men do it. When a woman does it she is just being meticulous about her own interests.

Blackthorn 12y ago

Assuming this is an honest question, the guy is creepy because men preying on women is much more common than the other way around.

beachstartup 12y ago
how exactly is going on dates preying?
- normloman 12y ago
  Nobody's saying that this guy is preying. But the fact that other guys prey makes unusual behavior like this more suspect. Women have to be more careful than guys, since they are more likely to be abused. So naturally, they are more sensitive to unusual behavior. You and I see this spreadsheet and think "this dude's just awkward, but probably harmless." But some women might think "serial killer alert." This is partly because of the media (watch enough dateline and you'll think every man's a kidnapper). But partly because of reality - some men do sick shit, and women are scared. My wife has some stories about past dates she's been on that would repulse you.
  - beachstartup 12y ago
    uh, women also do sick shit to men. it's 2015, being a twisted, terrible human being is now an equal opportunity phenomenon.
    - Blackthorn 12y ago
      It's almost like you didn't even read the thread you're replying to. One of these is much more common than the other.
tsotha 12y ago
In what way? What do you mean by "preying"?

majormajor 12y ago

A few differences that seem pretty big: * after-the-fact tracking and analysis vs a sorta in-progress playbook for trying to score * not sharing personal information, and not coming off nearly as judgmental in commenting on individual people—especially in the "not sending it to someone you're interested in and seeing" category, jeeze * sarcasm and jokes are a pretty well-established way of treading on could-be-creepy ground in a less off-putting way Even the Jezebel post itself, with its tracking down and interviewing people in the spreadsheet, is more creepy than this blog post...

tsotha 12y ago

You have to understand what a woman means when she labels a guy "creepy". It just means she's getting attention from someone she doesn't find attractive. If spreadsheet guy looked like Benedict Cumberbatch instead of being "creepy" he'd be, you know, innovative. The kind of guy who thinks outside the box in new and exciting ways. Particularly if he had money.

normloman 12y ago
No, he'd still be creepy. Lately, a lot of guys have repeated this misconception about "creepy," -- that it just means you're unattractive, and not genuinely unsettling. I'm sure that shields a lot of guy's egos. And maybe, in some cases, creepy really does mean unattractive. But creepy still has it's other meaning too. That spreadsheet thing would be creepy no matter who did it. Because the guy is trying to approach dating like a math problem (is he socially awkward?). Because he's keeping detailed notes of everyone he's met (who does that?). Because he probably sees women like entries in a spreadsheet.
- tsotha 12y ago
  Nope. If he were attractive all those things would somehow be positive traits.